Jerry awoke in his own bed that morning, not quite sure how he'd gotten there. All he seemed to remember was being at Queen Anne's Revenge one moment, and waking up at his place the next. Whatever happened in between was a total blur. What's more, he seemed to be wearing mens clothing that was not his own. Navy blue Adidas shorts and a bright yellow 'USC Banana Slugs' t-shirt adorned his body. He looked like...a dork.

My maternal grandmother and I had a very close relationship from the moment I was born. My father was beside himself with joy at finally having a son to pass on his name . Mother was just happy that 9 months of being fat and bloated were over. She figured that Dad would finally shut up and quit pestering her about having another child. My sister Angie was two years older and he pretty much ignored her. Grandmother told everyone that I would grow up to be a very special child. Dad came off with some snide remark to the effect of "Just as long as he isn't a sissy".