Vilastis

Not TECHNICALLY Crossplay | Chapter 1 of ?

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Alex stared at the mirror, trying to size up his potential cosplay.

I think having my hair like this should work. And I think that plucking my eyebrows helped. I should probably watch some makeup tutorials though.

At This Rate I'll Never Turn into a Girl! 3 [End]

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The next morning I had a bit of a headache. I went to the bathroom and took some of my sister’s pain medication. For some reason, they came in a little foil pack with individual pills labeled with different days. Strange!

I showered, using Sarah’s body wash because I was out. As I applied it to my skin I felt a strange tingling! I checked the label to see that it had a special exfoliating formula.

At This Rate I'll Never Turn Into a Girl! 2

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After my all my disappointments last week, I was sure that it was finally my time.

“I’m sorry, I think you’re a little too short to play Romeo,” the drama teacher told me. “Maybe try out for a different role.”

“I know. I’ll try out for Juliet! I’m sure I’ll make the perfect female love interest.”

The teacher looked at me strangely. “I was thinking something more… appropriate to your talents. Maybe Verona Citizen #1.” I was crushed, but I tried to remain firm. I could always try again next year!

Impetus Chapter 2

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Impetus

“Yeah, k’know, I just want to do everything I can to help our community!” the teenage girl said perkily, pouncing her foot up and down, her black and purple suit fitting snugly to her thin, lithe frame.

“I love you, Impetus!” someone shouted from the unwashed throng, fortunately held back by a barrier of police tape and news vans. Behind the mask, Adam held back a wince.

The Confession

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“Hey, I have something to tell you… I’m sorry I didn’t mention this earlier. I really hope we can still be friends once you know… but if not and if you’re weirded out I can understand...”

“...I think I’m a girl.”

Ian laughed. “God, I thought that you were actually going to say something big there, Allie. You had me going for a little. I was genuinely nervous.”

“...what?”

This was not at all the reaction Allan—Allie to friends—was expecting.

“...uh, maybe you heard me wrong? I, uh, was coming out to you… y’know… as a girl?”

Blog blog

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Alright first blog. Blog blog. Sorry I left some stuff unfinished and may not have responded to messages, I was feeling bad about my writing and was avoiding logging in for a while because of anxiety. Plus I'm pretty busy with school.

Honestly, with some of the stuff I posted I was hoping it being posted would motivate me to work on it, but nope. So some of the stuff I just have no ideas of how to continue while remaining interesting.

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Real Life 2

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Liz sighed. She hadn’t seen her grandpa in years, and he really wasn’t in the best of health. She realized she should probably go see him, but she also just really didn’t feel like it. But she finally got around to it. At least one last time before he died. Honestly, she was incredibly selfish and really should have done this before now.

Jugs

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Charles Edward Fitzgerald, CEO of Jugs (America’s #4 casual dining restaurant) slammed his fist down on his desk. “What do you mean, you told them I would do their moronic show? I gave you very explicit instructions.”

His secretary Francesca shuddered. “I’m so sorry—sir,” she hastily added.

“Don’t apologize, just fix this!”

First Impressions

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Mac was—well, “obsessed” would be to put it unkindly—interested in a rather particular art: the vocal impression. Since he was eleven he had been practicing voices: cartoon characters, celebrities, even his parents. But there was one wall he always ran up against: he couldn’t do female voices. It didn’t help that his voice had changed at a relatively young age. But it wasn’t just that: he also just felt too embarrassed. It felt like he was doing something… wrong.

The Imitation Game

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The Imitation Game
By Vilastis

“STOP IT!” Cassie yelled at her infuriating younger brother Caleb.

“STOP IT!” he yelled back.

She really hated when he did this kind of thing. And her parents didn’t fucking care. Even though he was fourteen now they still saw him as a cute little kid.

“Seriously, stop it!” She clenched her fist.

“Seriously, stop it!” He clenched his fist.

Gold Digger

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Gold Digger
By Vilastis

Marcus sighed. There was no way he was going to manage to make his rent this month.

Women had it so easy. They just had to flutter their eyelashes and some asshole with more money than sense would throw cash at them.

He had come to a decision. He opened a dating site and created a new profile. “Marcia.”

Impetus

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The world was so unfair. So wrong. How could someone like her become a hero? If anyone deserved to be famous…

But he was going to do it. Finally, he had overcome his natural ennui.

Impetus


By Vilastis

Impetus Chapter 1

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Impetus

Chapter 1: Impetus

Adam’s dream had always been different. While all the other kids around him played with their Overman and their Glory action figures, and chattered about how great it would be to save the day, his thoughts were full of darker things: swirling capes, shadowy figures, spinetingling cackles… You could leave those so-called “heroes,” saving the day with their fists and muscles, to the populist masses. Villains were the idol for the truly discerning, for the intelligent man.

But it wasn’t until he was a teenager, full of self-righteousness and hormonal rage, that he finally received the impetus to act.

At This Rate I'll Never Turn Into a Girl!

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At This Rate I’ll Never Turn Into a Girl!
By Vilastis

This story was basically written as an excessively long joke. The entire point is that there are constant jumping-off points for a fairly standard premise but it doesn’t take advantage of any of them. Side note: AJ is my best attempt at an underwritten stereotypical female friend.

Think Like A Girl

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Think Like A Girl
By Vilastis
Two friends make a strange bet that goes off in, well, a pretty predictable direction considering what website this is.

A Pack o' Parodies

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None of these parodies are meant to be of the work of specific individuals. I hope none of them seem too meanspirited. Poe's Law may apply. Typos may or may not be intentional.

The Implausible Cheerleader

by: Anastasia Lynn Walker

To think I was a normal boy two days ago... but let me start at the beginning.

Catfish Part 3

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catfish, noun: a person who sets up a false personal profile on a social networking site for fraudulent or deceptive purposes
—Merriam-Webster.com

So apparently things could get more awkward between Mark and Jason.

Catfish Part 2

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catfish, noun: a person who sets up a false personal profile on a social networking site for fraudulent or deceptive purposes
—Merriam-Webster.com

Jason's prank doesn't go as planned, and he finds himself dragged deeper into things than expected.

Catfish Part 1

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catfish, noun: a person who sets up a false personal profile on a social networking site for fraudulent or deceptive purposes
—Merriam-Webster.com

Jason's prank on his roommate goes terribly wrong... or terribly right.

Real Life

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She was living in her parents' house. Not earning nearly enough money. She sometimes felt that the pronoun was undeserved, she hadn't done enough to earn it. Hormones for a year and her appearance basically hadn't changed. People in stories always changed extremely. Transformed beyond recognition. They got desirable female figures, dyed their hair blonde, wore makeup and dresses. Even the nonfiction stories the press seemed to pick up, the people they seemed to be interested in, were like that. Look at these before and after pictures, it's amazing how much the person changed.

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