A Grumpy Old Man’s Tale 62 Hello Dad

Dave laughed and said, “Simmering on the Hobb‽ That’s over the border in Northumberland isn’t it? Small spot no more that six hundred folk live there.”

Tommy Dowerson said, “Nah. You got that one mixed up, Dave. That’s Gravy on the Hobb you’re going on about over in Northumberland. The Hobb river over there is nay mere than a beck. Simmering on the Hobb is on the outskirts of Ross on Wye away down country, Herefordshire way. Ross has about eleven thousand folk and t’other spot has maybe four. Just on the other side of Ross from Simmering is Custard on the Hobb where the custard boreholes are which strictly puts it into Wales. The Hobb is a big tributary, mostly in Wales, of the Wye which eventually runs into the Severn Estuary. There’re some odd town names down that way like Builth Wells and Symonds Yat. I only know because I did a postmasters’ course in Hereford a few years back.” There was just enough truth in Dave’s and Tommy’s ridiculous remarks to cause some confusion in the newer outsiders, but considerable hilarity amongst the locals and regular attenders from outside. Inventing silly, often profanely coarse, place names and equally ridiculous personal names vaguely connected to the satirical comedies of Monty Python, The Goons and Much Binding on the Marsh was an ongoing game they played often at each others’ expense. Their recently invented favourites were the villages of Shaver on the Motte, Hard on the Rod and Whacking on the Edge, the last of which came about as a result of a discussion concerning killing flies with a fly swatter. For some reason he wouldn’t explain Fluff in the Hinge was considered to be particularly amusing by Alf.

I curse you sister and I love you sister for what you did to me.

When for fun when I was 8 you dressed me in a dress.

The touch of those soft clothes, that feeling of I don't know,

excitement or embarrassment will always stay with me.

A Grumpy Old Man’s Tale 58 The Heller of All Hellers

Daphne said, “Most women I know, including me, have an awful lot of clothes. Not Stephen, but that skirt suit is genuine Harris tweed and cost a small fortune. All his clothes are the same, he doesn’t have wardrobes and wardrobes of them but what he does have is all the ultimate in quality. He should have been a woman because his dress sense is far better than mine. However, he’s a hundred percent man. He just likes dressing up in what other people call women’s clothes, but he doesn’t see it that way. He says, ‘I’m a man. They’re my clothes, so by definition they’re a man’s clothes.’ I suppose he does have a point.”

This is a bit of a re-released. I missed the end off of the story

This is a bit of a what if storyline, the start mirrors my own life but makes the choice I never did. I was around 8 when this story happens and as I came out as a trans woman later in life makes me wonder what if.

4.

The next day, the much-anticipated day of Tommy's aunt's wedding arrived. The sun was shining brightly, and there was an air of excitement as the family prepared for the joyous occasion. As the family got ready, Tommy felt a mix of nerves and excitement. He knew that he had an important role to play as the flower girl for his aunt's wedding. Despite feeling a little anxious, he was also eager to take part in the special event.