The drop into despair and the darkness that I had built around me, and set myself up for, crashed over me like a wave. I reached out for help, but could the hand save me, or would it be slapped away as the depth of my sorrow, and anguish overcome me?

Again this has comments on suicide and pretty much my first-ever anxiety attack. So, again if you cannot emotionally read about that stuff, I would suggest missing this story.

Warning on Grammar. While I have really tried to correct a lot of stuff, however, the email was real (in fact all the chapter is how it went down), and I didn't want to overly change the content too much. In saying that, reading the old email again now, .... Jesus grammar can be shit in email communication!! :D

*****
During the years after WWII the Raven family, while in many ways typical for the era, was anything but normal. The backstory began in the early spring of 1944. Then 20 year old Chuck Raven’s unit had just completed paratrooper training, allowing him to come home on leave before shipping out to Britain. Lorraine Rees, a stubborn and feisty 17 year old high school junior, had been forbidden to go out with a grown man. After arguing and sent to her bedroom, she locked her door and climbed from her bedroom window to the front porch roof, then eased over the edge to shimmy down a porch column to go out with him. Lorraine dropped out of school at the start of her senior year, giving birth to a son, Leroy, in January 1945. Since Chuck had been sent to Europe, a shotgun wedding had been impossible. Chuck’s parents lived on a farm a mile outside the town of Grantsport, 8 2/3 miles north of Reading, where Lorraine lived. When the weather turned warmer in the spring, she’d bundle her baby and walk the mile long dirt road out to the farm so the infant could meet his grandparents, 2 uncles, and a great grandmother.

What have I done? I simply got so excited about the dresses I found in the closet that I totally forgot they were not mine and that the owner, Alice, my new roommate, would maybe strongly disagree that I took the dresses and tried them on without asking permission.

“So?” Alice asked, seeming very angry and upset.

The continued story of my dive into my gender-fuelled mental break down. Again, this touches on emotions that you might feel upset about if you are not stable yourself, so be sure to feel safe before you read this.

In this part Daniel and I chat on IRC (yeah ancient Discord :D) and in my emotional imbalance the whole situation causes more emotions to run out of control and confusion to take over.

This does have some very mild cybersex type scene.

Also, if you are interested in the book I talk about in this "Nearly Roadkill" you can find it: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/207201.Nearly_Roadkill

Also want to add that a long time ago, Dana Short also helped me a lot on this chapter (in fact the whole story, but this one the most).