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Happy 70th Birthday

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Today was my 70th birthday and I admit waking up remembering what day it was and then thinking that being 70 was a new experience and wasn't I supposed to feel old? I didn't I I felt the same, despite my stroke back in May. My daughter was visiting with her hubby and I had arranged three roast beef dinners, 'Denis dinners', which those who have visited me in Dorchester for things like a Gabyfest will have experienced and named from the owner of the cafe where we ate.

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Looking for another old story

I'm looking for a story that had a guy moving from the British Isles to the US. He had a name that is male there, but female here (maybe Shannon?).

There's an issue with his luggage and he's stuck with a suitcase of female clothes (I think they are even close to his size).

He's got long hair and everyone in the new town (except the relative he'll be living with thinks he's a girl.

I *think* he's high school age as well.

It's *not* Texas Two-Step. I just re-read that because the synopsis seemed close.

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Never Give Up

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This only affects a small select few here on this channel with most of this info. Some may be informative to most trans. I still wish to share. If the VA you are going to doesn't full fill your needs then check with another one. Three years ago Amarillo informed me I had aged out of TG care. They would treat me as a vet but not trans. Switched to OKC and received more support than I knew what to do with. Keep in mind I was supplying them with forty years of knowledge about the mental and medical knowledge of trans in return. Most my doctors knew, some they didn't.

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a streak comes to an end with a whimper

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Some time after I had been on this site for a while, I realized I had managed to publish at least one story, poem, or essay each calendar month with one exception.

Being the kind of individual I am, it became an obsession to keep this streak going, and honestly, I think the quality of my stories suffered for it.

Well, as of midnight tonight, the streak is over, as I have not been able to produce any content for the month of November.

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Pete's Vagina -25- Backfield in Motion - Patrons Only because 18+ Rated

Maybe I was really in a bad accident, lying in a hospital bed, out of my mind on painkillers.

PV1-cov-001_3_0.jpg
Pete's Vagina
25. Backfield in Motion
Erin Halfelven
Read on Patreon - Patrons Only
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advice needed

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I really need advice.

I think my ex is taking advantage of me because I have a car, and she often will ask for a ride, only to add 2 or 3 extra stops, or want to spend much more time somewhere than she mentioned before she got into the car.

I put up with a lot because she is the sole caregiver of my disabled daughter, but then today she spent part of the trip insulting both me and my mother and claiming we were going to hell.

I really want to set a boundary here, but I don't know how to without it hurting my daughter.

advice please.

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Working on sequel to a book. Gas-lighting question

I spent a lot of yesterday trying to piece together a “meeting of the minds” between Jennifer Monroe and Travis Miller. Travis was one of the guys who left her for dead on the side of road in Missoula, Montana. Three years later, she returns to Missoula to confront her past tormentor:

I want to know if this is a good example of “gas-lighting”:

“It Can Only Go Up From Here”
Chapter 8 “Not Just a Girl” (snippet)

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Sparky Is My Hero

Originally posted February 13, 2000 on Original BigCloset

Warm Snoopy Hugs
"Sparky Is My Hero"
by Joyce E. Melton
February 13, 2000
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Daddy issues

I really ... really wish I could have a father/daughter relationship with my dad. When I first came out to him, I wasn't especially surprised when he had issues with me saying I was his daughter. But ... it's been a few decades since then. I'm pretty lucky, when compared to others, because my dad is willing to see me, and tells me he loves me. But, deep down inside me, there's still a little girl who wants to be held and cuddled by her daddy. I guess that may sound silly for a 58 year old woman to say, but that's how I'm feeling right now.

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Kaitlyn Jenner on Fox News……

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I just read an article on Fox News - and yes, I know, it’s Fox. Don’t kill me for reading Fox, but the only way to be truly informed is to read multiple news from multiple sites and from multiple perspectives. Yes, I am a Republican - but I am also not a Trumper (God, how I hate that man and his ilk!), and do not vote the party line. I am a fiscal conservative, and became a Republican because I believed in small government and what the REAL Republican Party stood for decades ago. So please don’t get on me for reading something that Fox posted as I also read MSNBC, CNN, the BBC, etc.

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Urgent DIRE Need. Please

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Urgent DIRE need. Please

Would my friends here please consider this? Samirah Johnson - known here as Violetfyre and on Facebook as Meave (Her primary FB account was hacked at the same time as mine)

Samirah lives in the Richmond area and has had virtually no help from her family The note below references her circumstances.

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Hatbox Negative - Need Help for the Weekend

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We're broke until Tuesday, negative by about $20, actually.

Contributions from our members are how we keep BigCloset operating.

Please, If you can help, it will be appreciated.

Paypal contributions come straight to our account.

Hugs,
Erin, Piper, Jamie, Cat and the rest of the crew

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Amy Did It Again

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Amy Schnieder won the Jeopardy Tournament of Champions. She outplayed a formidable field to win the $250,000 prize.

She has become the most successful female Jeopardy contestant ever, and is Jeopardy's first trans champion.

Jill

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Thankful

Thanks

I am thankful for all of you, readers, writers and supporters. And not forgetting our staff and helpers. Or absent friends like Bob Arnold.

This month marks the 23rd year I have been privileged to help present BigCloset/TopShelf as a friendly place to read, write and discuss TG fiction.

Thank you all,
Erin

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Happy, happy Thanksgiving!

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It's Thanksgiving in the US, and still 5 AM in the Northwest, so I'm laying in bed, thinking of all I have to be thankful for.

So many things are good! Even when things look bleak, I find that when I turn them around and examine them from all angles there's something good there. Even the death of my dad earlier this year got my sister and me working together, something we hadn't done for a long time.

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Wishing everyone a very Happy Thanksgiving!

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I have much to be thankful for this year - I have survived yet another year, it appears that my immunotherapy has been successful in that I have been cancer free for over a year and a half, the reaction which I had to the immunotherapy seems to have settled down and I am no longer in constant pain from my joints, my mobility has returned to very nearly 100% of what it was previously, and I am still surrounded by my family.

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Fact more disgusting than fiction

I have just posted a story based on fact entitled "Discharged - Female"

I had heard about these forced sex changes in South Africa and so I researched it a little and discovered more about the whole horrific thing, and that the number of mutilated victims was larger than I thought. Some stories have been told but many more have been buried. I did not access the findings of the "Truth and Reconciliation Commission" but I do understand the reasons why the post-apartheid government would want to bury the sins of the past in a bid to move forward as a mixed society.

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got some encouragement yesterday

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so yesterday, I went to the endo doctor's office, and ran into the doctor who had been treating me when I was part of the bariatric program, and she complimented me on the growth I've had since then.

I really needed to hear that.

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I had a productive day yesterday

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I had a productive day yesterday.

Got laundry done, picked up some groceries, and most important, managed to take a shower.

The last may not seem like a big deal, but it had been more than a month since I'd been able to work up the courage to actually shower.

so a good day.

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Mockreet Pocket Guide

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Okay, so here's the breakdown of The Mockreet. I can't believe I have to type this out, but here we go:

Timeline 1(Faedrye): Lyra appears in the body of Micah Lavoric, she lives in Auglire with her sister Sheena Rossi. She's been abducted due to Calliope's idiocy and now Sheena is searching for her. Lyra is now hiding amongst a group of would-be revolutionaries led by Quinn Mallory in their fight against both the High Landy and a smuggler named Old Jaf.

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I’ve got spurs that jingle jangle jingle

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I remember proudly singing that song on stage at Main Street Church kindergarten, beating sticks together while dressed in a tiny red vest, string tie, and cowboy hat. I don’t remember now if I had boots, or what girls got to wear.

Jangle, hats, what am I thinking? The hatbox donation link https://janglewood.com/one-time-gift/

Please help keep this site going if you can.

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The Anthropology of Desire

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I just finished reading a Wiki piece on the Eroticism of Islamic thought. The gist of it is that men are sexually attracted to a covered woman. And, generally women like being sexually attractive. In my years attempting to be a practicing Muslim woman, I liked being covered and really felt secure in the full face covering. The article strips the mystery away for me, not that I think there is anything wrong with being modestly covered. I think that being Muslim or not, generally men like to be in power over women. The Quran and Bible reinforce this. It's a funny funny world isn't it?

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Home Contracting

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As usual with home improvement projects, installing a new shower, and adding a sink and commode in the basement is taking longer and costing more than anticipated. The contractor is currently in the basement with a concrete saw, cutting out the floor.

Clay pipe under the floor is a good choice (in this case made in 1940) if you assume never having to excavate. It doesn't corrode. However, it is fragile. Argh. Tying modern plumbing drains into it is also a problem. Oh, and none of this is vented, so they have to add that.

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'32 trans people killed this year.'

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'At least 32 transgender and non-binary people have been killed in the US this year, the Human Rights Campaign said yesterday in its annual report.

America's largest LGBT political lobbying organisation found that transgender people of colour made up 81% of known victims, with more than half (59%) of victims being black. Trans women accounted for 81% of the deaths.

The report said the number of fatalities was likely to be an underestimate because deaths of trans people often go unreported or victims are misgendered.' (Associated Press)

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some good news about Sam

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So, we went to Sam's doctor today and got some good news.

Her CT scan showed no problems, which means whatever is wrong with her, it's not being caused by a tumor or a stroke or anything of that kind.

Which means that as was suspected at first, this is a psychological issue, or possibly a chemical imbalance, or maybe a bit of both.

We're a long way from a cure, but I think this was a major step forward.

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Gender Switch Channel

Found this Ikea commercial on Beverly Simmons' Youtube channel (she curates short video clips of gender transformations in movies, TV, and other media).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTAFWOU9vyw.

As far as I can tell, the channel has only been active for several days. She's been posting multiple clips each day. Magical transformations aren't my particular thing but I know there are lots of besties on this site who would enjoy these little video snippets.

Hugs,

Sammy

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my dreams keep getting better

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Okay so last night I think I had one of my best dreams ever.

I was an officer of the law, chasing a dangerous criminal in the mountains of British Columbia.

And I was amazing.

Strong, smart, and above all fearless, I overcame obstacles in my way with ease.

Sadly, the dream ended just as I had the bad guy cornered, but I have no doubt that version of me would succeed.,

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The Genesis of Scratch!

The Genesis of Scratch!

This little amusement created itself while we were away for a few days in East Anglia. The hotel had been booked before Her Majesty died, which meant that we ended up with two days (Sunday and the Monday of the funeral) when almost nothing was open. Stuck in a hotel room with only sandwiches bought the previous day and kept chilled in the room mini-bar, the idea slowly matured...

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Family traits

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Things to look out for.

Something that happened to me today…again.

When my hackles get up due to a perceived insult I become defensive. If it moves to a direct insult on me I get mad.

When I get mad I get very stubborn.

At that point I try to hurt the person that hurt me just as much or more than they hurt me. All reasoning with me goes out the window, along with any common sense apparently.

This is a family trait. I know about but can’t stop it from happening.

Makes me feel very bad afterword but the moment of apology is long gone.

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Define: Finished Story

I've been wondering about two stories, and what happened. Anastasia Allread wrote Healing a Princess, and Admiral Krunch did Christina Chase. Both have lain fallow since the last chapters were written, though neither story felt finished to me.

Penny Lane's Somewhere Else Entirely seems to periodically get charming carry on chapters.

I suppose HAP could have ended with one more chapter? It is not said what happens to Christina Chase though there is a strong implication that something would follow.

I'm thinking of reading all three of these stories again.

Gwen

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Plagiarism

Did Laurie S. publish her great story Transcending Marilyn -- about a Marilyn Monroe mimic -- under the new name He Is Our Girl by Melissa Raquel, or has someone stolen Laurie's story?

I ask because other novels by Melissa Raquel don't seem to be written in Laurie's voice.

Jill

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Beware of Old People and Kids

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One must love watching and talking to old people and or kids. Many have no disconnect on what they are thinking and what comes out of their mouth. To put the encounter into perspective I counsel those like myself. Too many take themselves too seriously and demand others don't make any errors in talking to or addressing them. Most little kids six or under seem to find me fascinating as they stare at me while holding their mother's hand or sitting in the shopping cart. Not my fault. Although I don't have her curves, I'm like Jessica Rabbit, I was designed this way.

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Paranoia about going out in public

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I went away for my last "fishing trip" of the year this weekend. I do actually go fishing, but the main reason I go is to have time as Leeanna. The memories I have let me cope with not being who I want to be.

After my mother helping me and pushing me the last time. She wanted us to go into the bar on the site. I refused. I just went for a short walk in the dark with her. She told me not to wear red lipstick and keep my makeup understated. She also told me not to use the red wig I have.

I went for a plain look. I just wanted to look like an older lady out for a walk.

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Nods and shakes

There are numerous differences between UK and USA English.

They're often subtle and usually relatively transparent. One of them is the US convention of referring to the ground floor of a building as the first floor whereas in the UK (and Europe generally) the first floor is reached after climbing a flight of stairs. In other words the US doesn't recognise a floor zero :).

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Revisions

I had received some good technical suggestions on writing from a couple of the experienced authors on this site (which, by the way, is one of the really wonderful things about this community!) and decided it was worthwhile going through and fixing some of my earlier postings. The suggestions had to do, primarily, with paragraph breaks and nuances relating to punctuation, not substance.

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Should my Drow/dark elf twins apply for this job?

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Should my Drow/dark elf twins apply for this job?....yes its a real job!

Just spotted this on my job feed and thought "hey they should apply!"

Entertainment HIP Park Elf Character...at some 'local HUGE name brand theme park'

JOB SUMMARY: A seasonal team member position with the responsibility of keeping the illusion of The North Pole and Santa Claus while portraying a Christmas elf.

ACTIVITIES INCLUDE:

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I've posted the revisions, last time, I promise.

If anyone is willing to re-read them, I would love to know if it is an improvement. I will post chapter 4 as soon as my early reader gets back to me on it, tomorrow, I hope. If anyone else wished to be an early reader, let me know please.

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a better type of dream

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So last night, I dreamed I was a freshman in university, and unlike a lot of my dreams, I was prepared. I had my schedule, a map, and a notebook where I wrote down where each class I was taking was located.

I'm hoping that dream means I am becoming less a victim of circumstances and recognizing I can do things to make my situation better.

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I'm taking a bit of a break on "Joining a club?"

I've noticed that I am not consistent in tense, the story wants to be written in first person, every time I try to write in past tense, I end up having to go back and make changes to try and keep it that way, as I change tense part way through. Please be patient with me, I'll have these corrected soon and I think the story will be much improved in the process. I've also become aware I was rushing through it too fast, in spite of knowing where the story is going, I need to take my time to be a better writer.

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Pete's Vagina -23- Return on Patreon for everyone

"I got something for you, well, for us," Megan said, giggling again.

PV1-cov-001_2.jpg

Chapter 23

I hit Number Seventeen around the hips, putting my shoulder into his belly, using my momentum to bear him backward, falling on top of him. I dug at the ball, but he didn't let go....

Football is a rough sport. Is Pete still tough enough to play?

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Some Fiction Isn't

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Remember the story of the little boy who received his wish and became a girl? Her own parents didn't believe him. She was kinda taken in by her best friend and her friends mother until Child Protection Services, FBI and others got into the act. Only her best friend and her friends mother believed her and yet CPS glomed onto the girl. The women in charge of the CPS was trafficking the children who came into her clutches.
Sadly, not that far into fiction.

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My Rainbow Mountain Camp Report

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This is a report I wrote up a long time ago, about a real life camp I'd gone to, that was specifically for adults (both male and female) who felt like little girls inside. I hope it's okay to post that memory here. It's very special to me, and I just wanted to share it with my friends at BCTS.

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Rago Open Bottom Corset with Garters

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Once in awhile I need to go out to something a bit more formal and have been wearing pantyhose. I hate them, hate them! So I got the bright idea to wear stockings with a garterbelt, and finding a garter belt with real garter fasteners is a trudge. So, instead I got an open bottom girdle with real fasteners and serviceable stockings. They were quite nice except the girdle is torture. I reasoned that I would buy one a size larger than my 38 4x. The sad part is the seller does not have a 40. ?x. It is amazing to me that genetic women are able to tolerate such punishment.

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good news, bad news

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Well, I just got a bit of good news. the social housing (reduced rent) agency has approved our application, and now we are on the wait list.

might be a while before we're near the top, but since we have a lease here until next June, that's okay.

Unfortunately, I also got a bit of bad news last night. The last few days Sharon, sick and exhausted, has had to phone me to get me to help persuade Sam to eat or drink anything at all.

That clearly cant go on for very long, so we're preparing for the possibility that Sam will need to be hospitalized.

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What's the Julie-verse?

Every once in a while, I'll come across a story that's set in the Julie-verse by Julie O, but I haven't been able to find any descriptions about what this universe is like. Does anyone know where I could find a description of this universe?

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My baby passed away.

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My just over two year old baby cat Willow passed away Thursday night Friday morning. He got into something he shouldn’t have, not the brightest cat, and after five days of not eating I gave him to vet. He died that night at vet.

I tried really hard to get him to eat but it didn’t work. I can’t seem to stop crying at odd times.

To make matters worse my uncle passed away as well. Yet another family member dead and funeral.

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Forces of Romance, by Maryanne Peters

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Attached is a link to me latest collection on Amazon, which is a collection of stories based on change of sex by force. Perhaps curiously for a writer of TG fiction, I have not written much in the sub-genre, so I surprised myself that I had enough for a novel length volume of 19 stories (63,300 words). Please follow the link and take a look.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0BKR64DFG

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If you can, but have not yet ...

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If you are here, it's because you want to be here.

For you to "Be Here", Big Closet also has to "Be Here".

The only reason BCTS is 'on the net', is because every month, enough people 'cough up' enough money to pay for everything.

And our Admins and core people are way too close to 'coughing up blood'. Every month.

Please think about what BCTS is worth to you.
---
This is only for people who can, but have not yet contributed - let's do a simulation:

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Mockreet 36 - Yes, it makes no sense for now

For those who were confused about The Mockreet Chapter 36 - yes, it makes very little sense right now. Truth is, it's not going to mean anything until the last third of the story, but as I'm winding down, it sort of had to go somewhere. I promise you, when you've done as much acid as I have, it makes more sense.

Speaking of which...

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Question regarding "Joining a club?"

I'm really curious, I am getting to the point of being able to write longer chapters, but I would like to know something. Would you like more frequent, shorter chapters or less often, longer chapters? I am able to get out a short chapter everyday so far, as long as I don't have extreme insomnia like I had the last two days, longer ones will probably be less often. I know when I'm reading I prefer longer chapters, but that is mostly because I read way too damn fast. I will post my next chapter sometime today.

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Oops

Hi everyone. I've been stoned out of my mind for the last week and someone just reminded me that I hadn't updated The Mockreet lately. Um. I posted a new chapter and tomorrow I'll post another since this one is so short. There's like...a lot written but to be fair the last few days I've been trying to locate the front door of my house with very little success. Anyway.

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Hatbox funds needed - Today

Cash contributions from our members are how we keep BigCloset operating.

Company account was down to basically $0

If bills hit, we will overdraft.

Amazon is supposed to pay us tonight, but my stomach is cramping now with anxiety about this.

Please, If you can help, it will be appreciated.

Paypal contributions come straight to our account.

Hugs,
Erin, Piper, Jamie, Cat and the rest of the crew

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Miss Universe

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It looks like Trump's Project that he started in 1996 and had the rights to until 2015 has now been brought by a Thai transgender activist for an undisclosed amount of money.

What do people on this site think?
Is it something that needs to happen or something that should of happened years ago?

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Thank you!

A quick message to thank you for checking out ‘My Faustian Bargain’. At a time when the economy is wobbly and bills are high, it means a great deal that so many people have chosen to buy my book. Especially given the large (and growing) number of free transgender-themed stories out there. Perhaps there’s life in the writing game yet!

Best wishes,

Bryony

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Sam is getting worse

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so yesterday Mom and I helped Sharon and Sam go to a doctor's appointment, and she has apparently been getting worse.

Sharon said she's sleeping poorly, having nightmares, and she had to fight like crazy to get Sam to take a meal replacement drink.

Sam's brain scan on Tuesday can't come soon enough . . ..

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OK, I get the message

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I'll quit posting song lyric parodies, I get that "My Gender Lament" wouldn't get many reviews, likes or even views. But out of over 600 viewers, I had 2 reviews and 18 likes. I'll quit posting these since so few like them, but I do have a story I'm going to try and write.

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Interesting video about Electrical Arcs

Taxonomy upgrade extras: 

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The Slow Mo Guys just published an interesting video on YouTube https://youtu.be/HDzVD-cqiWM about filming electrical arcs at 1.750.000 frames per second!

Something that the geeky nerds and/or nerdy geeks might enjoy.

By the way, some of their other experiments are plain weird, while others discover some pretty fascinating insights.

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Reason #4,182 I should not try to write

Got a new monitor, an LG C2 42" 4k OLED tv/gaming monitor. Upgraded from a dying 7 year old lcd, no problem, right? 2 year old Alienware, 3060 graphics card, should handle it without a problem, easy-peasy! Off the desk with the old monitor, totally rearrange the desk, piss off the kitties because their bed was moved, and start it up. This was it! The moment of glorious amazement was unfolding. There it was, a loading screen with Alienware logo.

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Big Closet Renovation (Or: What Do You Want?)

First things first: I have no official affiliation with BCTS as a business entity. Outside doing a few stories for Hatbox/Patreon and the occasional cover, I have zero input into the goings-on or function of our site.

That said... I love BCTS, and want it to succeed. I've been an official member for almost 16 years, and I've picked about for longer than that. I've been a member of this community for longer than I've been able to legally drink!

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