Jem… Chapter 138

*Angel………………..

We get the raisin bread out and I look at the girls. “The thing with this and the brown bread is a little bit of molasses on some paper towel and as soon as it’s out you just sort of polish the top with it…. (I’m doing it to show them.) and then just like a few minutes later do the same thing with some butter. It adds to the sweet and the butter will actually keep it from getting sticky because the bread will suck up the molasses really fast because it’s well bread.”

It really smells amazing in here and we made a lot of bread but we made a lot of rolls too and those are cooled and I have them bagged up.

It’s going to be a good day.

Carmen and Molly are eating rolls and peanut butter and I’m just doing the finishing touches on the rest of the loaves and I make up a whole bunch of spread for my raisin bread.

Raisin bread is a lot like hot crossed buns it’s a very close taste and they do an icing sugar icing for those but I’m making a Gladware dish full of the icing sugar and cream cheese stuff that Jenna used for cinnamon rolls.

Why because just that…on raisin bread toast.

I called the girls and texted them and we’re actually pretty good to go with all of them actually doing a vine on their phones and sending it in and all we sort of need in to get Molly to hook it all together and then us to talk to the people at the Chapel Street Shelter.

I’m bagging it up and I see Carmen checking her phone a lot.

“Parents?”

“No Adam and his crew.”

“You think it’s starting?”

She nods. “What the hell should I do?”

“Well assuming he doesn’t freak out about you giving me the card and me sending it off with the flash drive I think he’ll try and bully you into getting back in line.”

She looks at me. “Angel I can’t go back to doing that, I can’t…I’ll just.”

“Lie your ass off.” I look at her.

“Huh?” She looks confused and so does Molly.

I look at her. “It’s Adam he thinks people are worthless except him and he’ll like you saying that you’re here with us to spy and to find stuff out about Jason.”

She’s looking at me and she gets this look on her face. “How do you know that I’m not?”

“One you’re in love with Molly I think.” Carmen ducks her head and she blushes and covers her face and she’s actually crying into her hands and she’s nodding. “And two you’re my friend and I trust you.”

She’s looking at me and she’s sniffling and wiping at her eyes with the backs of her hands and Molly’s looking at her with this shocked awe.

“You love me?”
She nods and cough-laugh-cries. “Oh fuck yes…didn’t you notice us with the u-hauls?”

I laugh and they kiss and the phone rings again.

Molly and I shut up and Carmen answers the phone.

“Yeah Justin stop fucking bothering me.”
“You can go buck a fufflao for all I care put Adam on.”
“Because I heard him in the car with you, you goddamn dick.”
“………………..”
“Yeah, hey.”
“Yeah I can talk they’re downstairs doing laundry.”
“Yes I’ve been out of the group.”
“What do you think I’m doing I’m doing what all those assholes at the motel can’t do and finding that little shit.”
“Yeah that’s what I’m doing.”
“Oh…oh well I really do intend to get something out of this actually.”
“I want out, I want out after you have him and do whatever. I want to never hear from you again.”
“You know I’ll be quiet because who’d the fuck believe me and anyone I might tell would be like owned by you anyway. And besides.”
“I trust you Adam, I trust you simply because you have all the juice between us and I think that I’ve played ball enough to have you just let shit go.”
“I don’t care what my folks want or my mother wants Adam I’m so fucking done y’know…I’m broken, you did that, the johns did that…I just don’t have it in me to do this anymore…I don’t and the only way I can get out is to give you what you want…something that you want and this…Jason is something you can’t buy.”
“Yeah I’ll update you but stop fucking calling me it’s getting them looking.”

Carmen hangs up and she drops her phone like it’s burned her hand and she looks at me and she just loses it and there’s this huge broken sob that comes out of her and it bends her over it’s that bad and I go to her and Molly goes to her and she’s sobbing and she’s crying and she hangs onto Molly for dear life and I help them make it to the couch.

I just rub her back and say. “It’s alright.” Over and over and it’s not, there was way, way too much truth to this for her to be hit like this and she’s losing it…god this is like someone throwing poison up to get it out of her system.

Molly’s looking at me and there’s this look in her eyes like she’s just getting why this is hurting Carmen so much.

Molly’s looking at me like she’s expecting or looking for me to do something, like to maybe freak out because she gets what Carmen did or what she was going to do.

Why she was here when she first was starting to hang out with us.

I sink down to my knees on the floor in front of the couch and I lean over and I kiss Carmen on the cheek. “It’s okay, I knew…I knew when it was happening and it’s okay.”

Carmen holds on harder to Molly’s waist but she cry-screams.

“How!? I was going to betray you…that was like the entire fucking plan1 I was going to you all of you to find Jason and if I couldn’t find Jason then I was going to help break up the band so that Adam could like come to your rescue!”

I look at her. “Because along the way of all of that and the stuff we’ve been through we became friends. And friends, real friends are there, we love and we forgive even when we right royally fuck things up.”

Okay…okay I’m trying to be strong too but it’s not working and I’m crying and she’s bawling and Molly’s crying and we’re doing that for a while.

Until I get a hold of myself and (Sniffle-snerk.) “Buck a fufflao.”

And that’s when it kind of turns into that emotional laughter that comes after that level of stuff that we just went through.

I let out a sigh and sort of let my legs do that sideways out girl slide until I’m sort of sitting on my butt. “Well that should hold him for a while hopefully at least until that evidence gets looked at.”

The girls nod and I look at them. “I need to wash my face and then get our stuff. The way that I’m feeling right now I thing that I need to get out of here and do something.”

Carmen nods. “I just…I need to do something to make me right…god I feel so not right.”

I nod. “Yeah I totally get that and just getting through stuff like this we can use something really good to do.”

I head off and get my things and I call Jimmy to come and pick us up and by the time that we’re all ready and cleaned up he’s here and he even came to the door. I open the door when he rang the doorbell and he smiles and he even takes off his cap when he sees me.

“Hello Angel how was your Thanksgiving?”

I lean over and kiss his scruffy cheek. “It was great and yours?”

“Can’t complain it was nice.”

“Good, you deserve nice.” I look at him. “You free for the afternoon?”

“Sure thing what do you have in mind?”

“I have some running around to do but we’re doing a bit of charity from the band for The Chapel Street Shelter.”

He looks at me and he looks at the girls. “That’s a damned good idea; you got me for the day no charge.”

Molly’s looking at me and she has that face as I pass Jimmy my Keytar and some of the other things. “Do you do that to all of them?”

“Who?”

She gestures expansively. “Everyone…”

I chuckle and so does she and I shrug. “Jimmy’s a friend and he’s a really good man.”

She nods and she actually gives him a smile. “Y’know I actually think I will trust you on this…you just seem to...”

Jimmy takes some of the bags with the bread. “Shine, angels like Angel are real and their people and they still shine.”

Okay I’m blushing.

The girls get a good laugh out of that as we pile in and I pass Jimmy a plastic grocery store bag with two loaves in it. “These are for you.”

He holds the bag open and he does that old guy pure pleasure smile as he takes a big inhale. “I’m a happy man now, these and some tea and make some toast in the mornings it’s just be right.”

I smile and he does the door thing for all of us and we start to go and I ask. “Can we stop at Rick’s a moment?”

“Home Hardware?”

“Yup I have some stuff for him too.”

Molly rolls her eyes. “Did you bake for the neighborhood?”

“A little bit, I’m just down the road and it is my local hardware place and it’s just a good thing y’know being a good neighbor.”

Both girls are looking at me.

I smile and laugh a little as we stop and I get the bag for them and I head inside and rick’s dad sees me and he gets this great big grin on his face. “Angel!”

I hold up the bag. “I came bearing gifts.”

He hollers. “Rick! Angel’s here!” and he comes over to the counter and rick comes out from the back and he looks at me.

“Angel, hey how was Thanksgiving?”

“Great but busy too things are really coming together with the band and the jobs and our website plus the whole thing that we’re all thinking of for the town.”

He looks at me. “Okay that is busy what thing?”

I highlight the idea I have and he’s nodding. “Sounds good actually sign us up we’ll buy ad space on the site.”

“Oh that’d honestly be cool and we could use the backing too.” I pass him the bag. “There’s two loaves of white and a loaf of brown bread, and multi-grain in there.”

Both of the guys do the same thing as Jimmy did and undid the bag and they smell.

Rick looks happy and he looks at me. “You want a coffee?”

“No I’m on my way to do a charity thing for The Chapel Street Shelter.”

Rick’s dad looks at me. “Hang on a minute and he goes over to the cash and he has one of those spin displays with the gift cards on it and he takes down some and he writes on the back of them with a marker the name of the shelter and he scans them in.

I look at him as he passed me five fifty dollar gift cards and I have a lump in my throat. “Guys…I didn’t come here with hat in hand.”

Rick shakes his head. “No you don’t and that’s the thing you’re not like that and you’re doing something good so I know it’s going to go to a good thing.”

I blush but take them and I say. “You got to do something for me then so I can like make this right.”

Rick looks at me. “Okay…”

“Say a little bit about the shelter and how Home Hardware is close to home?”

“Uhm okay…” He’s blushing and I call Molly in to tape it and it takes a couple of things and we get this commercial clip thing.

*** Angel is at the counter and she’s looking at the camera and smiling in her make-up but in just a sweater and jeans.
“There’s a few places that you can go to and they’ll make you feel right at home and then there’s places that help you make a place a home. Harper’s Point Home Hardware’s one of those places. We were really grateful we have such a place that gives back to the community.”

She holds up the gift cards and turns then around to show the name written on the back of the cards and the camera turns to Rick.

He’s nervous and he’s standing with his Dad who’s leaning on the counter from behind it. “Sometimes you have to give back, We’re help is close to home even for those that don’t really have one sometimes. Please follow the links from this to The Chapel Street Church’s Shelter and donate or look at the lists on their webpage and help if you can.”

*Angel…

We get done and there’s tight throats and some tears and there’s some hugs too and we head off and Molly’s wiping away tears as she’s doing stuff on her tablet and Carmen has her pulled over so she’s sort of leaning on her.

I can hear Molly sniffling all the way there and I look back into the mirror at her. “Hey you too started this.”

She nods. “I know, I know but it’s just…I went to a church and had a really religious family and all it was for me was just layers and layers of bullshit. It was what we could do for the church and then it was what the church sort of did for the congregation and it was pretty much screw the rest of the town…I’ve never really actually seen this Ange, I’ve just seen it on TV and it’s always been that way.”

I smile. “I guess it’s a family thing Remy always went out to help people like with dozers and tractors or even their semi-trucks and a whole lot of the time it was just pay as you can. And it was trading a favor for a favor, he still does that.”

We pull into the shelter and we get out and Jimmy comes with us and we ring the bell and this older lady looks at me and she has a wimple on but she’s dressed pretty normally. I think she’s a nun?

Jimmy hugs her and she hugs him. “Jimmy it’s good to see you are these girl in trouble?”

I shake my head. “No Ma’am we’re here to help.”

She gestures at my face and at the girls. “I was just thinking with the state of your make-up and everything girls. And that’s sister dear I’m not an officer I don’t get Ma’am’d.”

There’s this shared smile and laugh between her and Jimmy. “Girls this is Sister Beth, she’s an old friend.”

We’re blushing at the comment on how we’re looking and all say. “Hello sister.”

Molly asks. “Is Jan here I’m Molly.”

The nuns face lights up. “Oh you’re the girl that’s going to help us with our computer page! Come in come in all of you!”

I smile and look back at the van. “We also baked some bread; I had to make some for the house anyways so it was no trouble.”

She gives me this smile. “That would be lovely and most welcome dear.”

She calls some girls out and calls for Jan and we carry things in and Jimmy carries things in too and the Sister looks at me. “Had to make some anyway?”

I grin at her. “Actually yes, there’s six of us girls in the house plus two bikers and two grown men and a teenaged boy that eat with us sometimes.”

She looks at me. “Are you running a shelter too honey?”

“No but we’re a local band and we’re all housemates and family. We sort of call it Starlight house it’s a sort of a playoff of things with my last name and my stage name.”

She looks at me. “Oh my word you’re Starlight Butterfly, You’re Jem!”

I look at her surprised. “You’ve heard of us?”

She takes my hand. “I’ve been to two funerals child that they played Oncology.” She sniffles and she hugs me. “God bless you girl.”

(Sniffle-sob) “It’s not just me Sister.”

She pats my back and says with some humor in it. “It’s never just us dear.”

Okay that makes me smile.

We head inside and there’s some of the women and some of the kids and they’re already into the bread and the rolls and Molly’s at their computer and she has her external hard drive and some flash drives and she’s doing stuff that I aren’t too savvy on and I pass her the cards and give her a nod and she smiles at me.

No it’s more than that like Jimmy said she sort of shines.

Carmen is taking me off to the side to clean my face again and re-do my make-up and there’s some kids that are there and they’re looking hopeful too and I look at the kids.

“You want to help me set up or have Carmen do rock band make-up for you too? I mean as long as it’s alright and everything.”

The mom’s there are nodding and some are watching me set up and some are watching Molly and most are eating the bread and rolls that didn’t make it into the shelter’s freezer and the raisin bread with Jenna’s topping is getting swoons.

I will have to send her e-mails about this.

But I can see girls and women and kids with really, really very little some are moved out and some just don’t have a place and this place is stuffed really, I mean we’re not a big town or a city but it’s just.

I’m not Jenna, I’m not a person of any strong faith but I’m not saying no either but that whole phrase but for the grace of god goes I…I get that I’m lucky.

The girls at the computer are looking at me and I’m hearing Rick. There’s a lump in my throat still hearing this and I say. “Molly filmed it and she’s the one that put it up on our stuff.”

They’re thanking her and she’s so not used to this kind of praise and not this close and that chokes me up pretty hard until Sister Beth brings me a tissue and a cup of tea and that helps I’m getting things all hooked up for the bit of video that I’m going to do here and Sister Beth looks around and she’s smiling.

“This is good for them; people send things sometimes but people taking an interest well that’s just not as common.”

I nod. “I’ve never had that mommy ow thing until I saw how happy the little girl in the kitten ear band was when Carmen painted her face to be a kitten.”

She nods. “I have had it and I still have it but that just tells me that there in a place in my heart for children and that even if I’m not bearing any myself that I have that power to care and to help them.”

I nod and smile at her. “I have a song for that one too.”

She smiles at me and I sip at my tea. “Sister Beth do you sing.”

“Oh yes some I was in the choir for a long time.”

“Would you like to sing with us?”

“Us?”

I hold up my phone. “We did some things earlier. The other girls in the band and we’re going to splice it together here.”

“Do you want me to sing or can some of the women and the children sing too.”

“Both honestly.”

Sister Beth has a beautiful smile.

*** The Video…
The room is dark and the curtains are drawn inside a fairly big room and there’s the sounds of a piano playing and there’s a lamp that turn on and Angel is sitting on the corner of an old brown couch playing the piano music on a white Keytar and there’s an amp at her feet.

Then there’s the sound of this young girl singing out in that darkness as she comes out and she finds a place to sit out in the light.

“When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Mary comes to me.”

She’s joined by a group of other kids close to a dozen and they all choirs sing at once.

“Speaking words of wisdom, let it be…”

A native American girl with short cut hair and what looks like fading bruises comes in and she’s singing as she takes a seat on the far arm of the couch.

“And in my hour of darkness
She is standing right in front of me.
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be…”

Then it’s Angel singing.

“Let it be… let it be…”
Let it be… let it be…
Whisper words of wisdom… let it be…”

Then Sister Beth comes into the scene and she leans on the native girl that sang before who has tears in her eyes and she sings.

“And when the broken-hearted people
Living in the world agree
There will be an answer… let it be…”

“For though they may be parted
There is still a chance that they will see
There will be an answer… let it be…”

Then it the scene pans back to show the room filled with people and children and they and Angel and Sister Beth and they’re all singing in unison.

“Let it be, let it be
Let it be, let it be
Yeah, there will be an answer… let it be…”

“Let it be, let it be
Let it be, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom… let it be…”

“Let it be, let it be
Ah, let it be, yeah, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom… let it be…”

Then the scene shifts to Raven in her Wal-Mart things and she’s outside and in this parking lot and there’s employees all coming together getting closer to her as she’s singing. And added in is Kimmie and Brooklyn coming out of their school doors and they’re walking down the steps and the scene flickers to show some of the other kids from their class and the three girls are now split-screen as the three of them are singing.

“And when the night is cloudy…
There is still a light that shines on me…
Shine on until tomorrow… let it be…”

Then Raven is belting it out in that powerful voice of hers.

“I wake up to the sound of music!”

Then Brooklyn is doing it too with.

“Mother Mary, Mother Mary… comes to me!”

And then it’s Kimmie who’s crying and her mascara’s running and she’s singing.

“Speaking words of wisdom!... let it be!”

Then the employees there that volunteered for the choir that their doing are all joining in with Raven and they’re singing and the students gathered with Brooklyn and Kimmie are singing and it’s all together both groups.

“Let it be…let it be…
Let it be… yeah… let it be…
Oh, there will be an answer… let it be…”

“Let it be… let it be…
Let it be… yeah… let it be…
Whisper words of wisdom… let it be…”

And the scene fades out in the shelter with Angel playing her Keytar and she fades out singing.

“Shine on until tomorrow…Let it be…”

The video lightens with Angel sitting with all the girls and regular room lighting and she looks into the camera and says. “Places like Chapel Street Church’s Shelter are always in need of so much help an even a little bit, just whatever can be spare be it donations of time…”

It shifts to Raven and the Wal-Mart crew an she’s holding up a bunch of gift cards. “…or money can make a serious difference with people that have lost everything for whatever reason.”

She switches then to French and says the same thing including what Angel had said and the scene shifts to Brooklyn and Kimmie with the students there and they have a bunch of laptops and phones out.

Brooklyn… “You can find the link to this video on our YouTube and our Facebook pages as well as being able to buy it on I-tunes under the Starlight Butterfly listing.”

Kimmie… “Please look for the Paypal link though on the linked page for the shelter’s site and help if you can afford to and please don’t forget there’s a wants an a desperately needs list there on their page along with their contact information so even if you’re too far away you can send things that are needed if you’re able to.”

Then she actually does what Raven did and said it all in Japanese.

Though every time there was a break in what she was saying Brooklyn was yelling in the background “Hai!”

The students there all held out there phones. “Please help, we did!”

The shot goes back to Angel who smiles into the camera. “Please help, it’s a good cause an we really need places like this in the community. Thank you all so much for taking the time to listen. Peace and Love and Music everyone.”

………………………………………………………………………………………………………

This chapter’s Sister Beth is a shout out to Beth W. who was a pretty cool woman of faith and is totally missed.