It's perhaps a bit early, but I just received confirmation from Social Security that I will be receiving retirement benefits starting next month. Actually, this month, but they won't actually pay me until April.

It's kind of a bittersweet situation. Those with whom I've shared know that I have been out of work and looking for about three years now. It's frustrating for someone with my experience to be passed over. My resume (CV) is impressive, perhaps too much so.

There are occasionally, stories one shouldn't read in certain moods. I loved it, but Randalynn's story "Case Closed" hit me hard. The trouble i have is how much I feel like Paul:

"what do I have to look forward to? Years stretching ahead of me, all alone and in pain, tormented by all the real people? That’s the clarity you gave me this morning, by the way. I know now that I can’t be anything but what I am — the human joke. It’s not going to change.”

“You could — ”

Story in "Mail Online" Maybe this could apply to Transgendered Women too? http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1370138/Childless-...

Well, down I go. I'm right on the edge of a major depression, and I don't know how to stop it. My emotional reserves are dry, I'm having flashbacks, and my job situation gets worse each day. Pray for me.

Well, writing is going well. I wrote over ten pages on 300 Rains just today, so that was good. This post is just an FYI for all of you, things are coming up that may cause some sensitive readers some emotional upset. As they get closer to Brazil things get crazier and crazier. Like I said, this is a storm warning, so make sure that when the storm hits you you are emotionally prepared. So in the immortal words of Samuel L Jackson, "Hold on to yer Butts!"

When the chapter in question hits I will just put storm in the extra description. Just saying.

Well, I should know better than to get my hopes too high. I had gotten a call from the manager at the restaurant that is in my old work, and made the assumption she was interested in hiring me. Since she had talked about it before, and already said she would have had no problem with me being Dorothy if it was up to her, I started to have dreams of being able to be a waitress. Of course, I was wrong, and she just wanted to pass on a lead she gotten from a customer. Nice of her, I know, but not what I was hoping for. Ah, well.

Winter's Quiet

Hey, all!

Sorry I haven't posted stories lately, but I'm a very seasonal writer, and go quiet in the winter (or dormant, or into hibernation, or whatever...)

Since Spring is here and I'm writing again, I'll be posting soon.

-A

I saw a nice car today. It had lovely curves, and a very slight hint of chunkiness. I got the impression that the chunkiness was the result of a severe manufacturing defect, that had been mostly corrected.

...And the last three letters on the registration plate? = )

Well, yesterday was a full day. I picked up my check from the telephone sales job (I made 300 dollars in 3 days, so not bad)

Yeah I had a car accident and yeah I lost my job, but we have just found out that aside from paying for it, we now as good as own our French property.

I'm totally stoked and so is Pen.

It's scary shit, but so exciting I can't find the words - whaddya mean, that's a first?

So now I just need to get this insurance thing sorted to call this somewhat stressful part of our lives over.

I can distinctly remember a time not so very long ago, when I had myself utterly convinced that I was absolutely incapable of writing short, one-shot stories. I guess, in a way, I was incapable at the time, but not for lack of ability.

In retrospect, I think it was more a combination of facts. One of those was that I was just so laser-focused on writing my novel/serial. In the past, writing has been my therapy. I wrote for the exclusive purpose of writing what I needed to write, what I needed to get out of my system.

Nearly two weeks ago, I told you that Penny and I would be going to go on a lightning trip to France to look at a couple of houses.

The history is that we've been wanting to buy a house in France for years - literally and after the global financial collapse, the change in value of the Euro, life seemed to say that we weren't going to do it. This was after having been to Normandy and Poitou Charente to look at houses and being disappointed at what was really available.

Before shutting down here, I decided to upgrade to the Firefox 4. That was an hour and a half ago. Mozilla really screwed the pooch this time! Lots of cosmetic crap that wasn't necessary and really screws up the layout. Several of my most used apps won't work with FF4 It took me less than 5 minutes to decide to go back to the previous version. That's when the fun begin. Uninstalling FF4 did not roll back to the previous version, and no matter what version I tried to download I always ended up with FF4 again.

As of the 18th of April, three days after my birthday, I will be officially and legally, Catherine Linda Michel!!!!! I never thought, for real, that this day would ever come, due to financial restrictions, but it's here, it's real, and I am ecstatic!!!

Yes, there'll be a buncha stuff I'll have to do AFTER the 18th, to change all my identification and stuff, and of course, learn to sign a new name... LOL, but I can already feel a new peace within myself and a renewal of my goal, full SRS. That however, can wait til I can find the funds. This step will suffice until then.

I wanted send out a public thank-you to Beth W., who spent time on the phone with me yesterday, on her dime. Bless you, sister. Sadly, I am fighting a fever, so its going to be a while before I feel 100 %

According to my account, I've been a member here for four years and three hours. Earlier on I'd noticed it was three years and fifty two weeks--that's like being five feet twelve. I suppose the 'puter decides it's four years when the same time of day is reached as the original enrolling time.

Goodness, four years, I was young and innocent then - now I'm old and innocent, ho hum.

well, the door to my old job has closed. No chance to go back. To add to my stress, I got an email from my brother that really set me back. Its hard to keep from being discouraged with all these setbacks.

Well, Monday, I go grovel for my old job back. Dont have a lot of hope, but need to try. Pray for me, if you are the praying type.

I've concluded that my chapters of Angry mermaid might be too long for some and that's why they get bored before the chapters are concluded.
I've been a little bit disappointed by the lack of comments recently and I suspect many readers just switch off before they've finished the chapter.
I'm therefore going to try a new tactic by shortening the chapters to about 25 kb instead of the normal 50-ish.

After Chapter 25 the chapters will run about roughly 25 to 30 kb's.

Just have to wait and see if people prefer it that way.

Bev.

There is a project I've been working on for some months now. It's going to be postponed. See, my entire life is pretty much a pile of GNORT, the Living Spleen -- and the reprieve I had for a short time seems to have ended. I have my lovely partner, but the rest of things... losing my job, being faced with the revelation that I really am as reprehensible a person as I always thought, the still-raw loss of my baby brother three and a half years ago, has resulted in my ability to write being pretty much admitted to the psych ward for awhile. Sure, I can write some...

A report in today's Guardian about a gay character in a Malaysian film who has a sex-change to please his/her boyfriend and then regrets it before falling in love with a girl.

See for yourselves: http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2011/mar/18/malaysia-first-f...

Well, I am trying to keep a positive attitude about my brief experience in the workforce as Dorothy. It was good for me to be me in a RL situation, something I can try and build on if I find another place accepting enough to let me be myself. I just don't know how realistic that actually is. I have so few skills, I feel like some grunt job is my best option, and those are not usually flexible. Ah, well.

Hi

Just thought i'd share this free shipping offer to those of you in the UK.

go to http://stores.lulu.com/store.php?fAcctID=192079, select your books then quote 'GROUNDUK' when you check out to get free ground shipping within the UK.

valid until 21 March 2011

ttfn
Maddy

Some of BeverlyColleen's posts have reminded me of a not-so-pleasant experience while I was doing my RLT.

I thought I would share what some of that was like for me.

It seems, by caring too much, I've inadvertantly hurt someone. So...from now on, I am staying OUT of other people's lives completely. I'm not answering questions, or offering advice, or anything else remotely like that ever again. In fact, consider this my withdrawal from the "community" et al!

Every fucking time I let my feelings get hold of me and I care too much, I end up with someone being hurt! Well, I'm done. Carry on without me!

Catherine Linda Michel

Please refrain from commenting on this blog, as I will answer none of them.

Danielle J told you about her Racoon , well my day stared at 7:20 AM when a deer jumped out in front a my car I hit it going about 50 MPH it bounced over my engine hood then slid about 30 or 40 feet and got up and ran away can't say as much for my car. The left front fender, headlight assemble, bumper has a rip and the engine hood is rippled so it cost $500.00 dollars as a deductable and the loss of the car for a few days.I am OK just a very fast heart beat. Oh and 1 of my dogs was so frightened he threw up. What a way to start St Patricks day-----------HUGS and KISSES RICHIE2 P.S.

We're having ribs! See you there!

Hugs,
Erin

I've added the data to Odyssey locale info to update for the current chapter 16.

OK here's the deal. I am taking a break here; rethinkin what I am gonna write, and I am sort of tired of the ideas that some people are pushing at me. No drama here, I'm just standing up for myself. I am finding that certain things I do just retraumatise me, so I'm not gonna do them any more. That would be dumm. I'm not answering any more calls that are unlisted.

I'm gonna finish Lt Katia and write an end to Ms Frankenstein. After that I don't know what I am gonna write. And no, I am not on skype all the time anymore.

I have come to the realization that writing from the perspective of a serial killer is bad for my health as a writer.

The first time I wrote an episode of Obsession, I was gone for four months.

This time, being better prepared, I was able to get back into writing after only a week.

That being said, I am so far behind with 12-String that I kick myself constantly. I am writing it, though, and am about 2/3rds done with the current chapter, and have already had the first third proofed for the first time.

Due to your work load Erin, I did not send this directly to you in hopes that someone else can help me with this. There are a few of my stories that I don't feel good about and I would like to either unpub them or delete them. I thought there was a place that I could access to just unpub them but have not found it. Can someone help me.

Much peace

Khadijah

I am in need of a good pic for the title page for 'the princess and the Jock. If you have suggestions please pm me with them.

Thanks
A.A.

WARNING: This is going to be long, and perhaps a little nonsensical/cyclical. I'm pouring it all out into text to get it out of my system, but I promise it has a happy ending.

Depression sucks. I know that's stating an obvious fact, but I ended up giving myself a swift kick in the rear today, so I needed to write about it because that's why I started blogging in the first place, over two years ago. I want to be able to look back at this and laugh someday. Call me conceited, but I also want to stand as another reminder to others that no one suffers alone.

I was living a lie: The 16st bodybuilding Father who is now a glamorous FEMALE model

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1366032/Transgende...

I found this surfing the net and was on the UK On-line Paper: "MAILOnline" She also has a 9 yr old daughter that fully except's her, interresting story! Richard

Apparently this week is the 100th anniversary of the Cheltenham Festival, so a betting company commissioned some designers to create some appropriate footwear to auction off for charity.

Apparently they feature an imitation hoof made from carbon fibre and up to 5,000 individual horse hairs. And have a guide price of  £1,300.

Definitely for those with more money than sense.

I'm freakin crazyly happy, of course its last minute but hell if i ain't smiling...the long wait for my first appointment with my endocrinologist is here friday afternoon, I am so syked I have been waiting since february 2010 and livin fl time (without name change)(family doc retired just before i went to book the appointment needed to sign a section in the application) :( since April or May woot woot hormone train is just around the bend i can't wait :)))

Well, I finished my 1st day of work as Dorothy. The good news is that my trans status mattered not at all. After the morning meeting, nobody failed to call me Dorothy, and a couple of girls walked with me to a coffee place for lunch, and obviously had no problem being seen with me. The only bad news is that the job is rather stressful, insofar that you are under some pressure to make sales. Keep praying for me.

Well, last night I got a chance to celebrate my upcoming job with the local tg group. Everyone was, of course, thrilled for me, and several took the time to calm my nervousness by telling me they can see my growing confidence in terms of portraying a run-of-the-mill woman. (As opposed to me feeling like a I looked like a man in drag) Still got a lot of butterflies in my tummy though. A prayer for me about Monday would be appreciated.

A slightly odd story idea that came to me in a dream...

A group of teenagers arrive at a disused holiday camp (in the dream it appeared as a pair of linked islands, the North containing a mini-mansion designed for group leaders, the South containing deteriorating simple log platforms and structures designed for use for camper accommodation) determined to 'do it up' as they enjoyed their times there and didn't want it sold off to a developer.

Japan has experienced a most devastating earthquake and tsunami. Hundreds are confirmed dead, and thousands are still among the missing. It might not be over yet either, as reports coming out of Japan seem to indicate that a damaged nuclear plant might be in meltdown.

The quake is the 5th biggest EVER recorded and the tsunamis spawned by it have already impacted Hawaii and the east coast of the U.S. Please say a prayer for those who have died, for those who are missing, and for a country that will have a horrible time recovering.

in sadness, I am,
Catherine Linda Michel

And remember, this is Spring Ahead night in the US and CA switches from Pacific Standard to Pacific Daylight Savings Time at 2 a.m. Sunday morning.

A somewhat mild one, to be sure, but panic nonetheless. Reality has just come crashing down around my ears, what with the name change now being in the hands of the court and everything else. I've spent the last few days, surrounded by workmen who are doing stuff around the house thats needed done forever, and either none of them have twigged to the fact that I'm not a GG, or they just don't give a damn about it.

Well, I got a call back from the call center. I start training Monday morning. Going to go as pretty as I can. Here is hoping I can do the job well enough.

If you are on a Pacific Coastline please move to higher ground. For those in Japan, I hope you are safe.

There was a monster earthquake in Japan. 8.9!

Please get to a safe area.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110311/ap_on_re_as/as_japan_ear...

I was originally going to write my Green Arrow sequel next but it looks like my Red Devil story was a little more popular than I thought and numerous people have asked me to continue it. So I'm going to write a few more chapters of ot until I find a satisfying conclusion. After that I'll move onto the further adventures of Olivia Queen. I've already created a Title Page for the story and am hard at work on a next chapter and changed some of the perimeters on my first part to match. It should be up soon, maybe in a day or two.

Now I've got to get back to my game and finish playing :)