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009) The Final Notch

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I'm now 30" waist circumference, 38" hip, 0.79 ratio.

The body hair is continuing to become reduced, though it seems to have slowed down for now. I think it's directly linked to my growth cycles, instead of growing normally though, it's reverting. One time when I was working, I could swear I'd felt a ton of needle pricks all at once along my arms, and when I looked, everywhere that I'd felt that, the hair had turned pale and thinned drastically.

No change in the boob department.

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And now I am all alone in this world

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I was born on January 22nd 1975, the first and only son of Keith and Vivian Leonard. I was named after my father and the connection with him pretty much ended there. From what I pieced together, he left when I was 6months old. I think the very next day my mother decided that she didn't want to stick around either. So there I was, 6 months old and unwanted. Maybe not completely unwanted, because there was Aunt Rosalie, there was always Aunt Roe. She took me in and raised me the best she could. When her husband got up and left us, we took on life together.

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Re: Through the years

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I know I went from posting daily to big stretches of nothing. Been a little hectic dealing with the former job and trying to figure out what I want to do in life.

I am also stuck on what I want to do with the story. I'll try to get what I got written so far finished soon and try to get into a better schedule.

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008) It's Official: Bra == Wristwatch.

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And that happened danged quick too.

It got quite warm at work today (at least 80+), so I took off my work uniform t-shirt and since my bandeau is plainly visible through the thin fabric of my tank tops, I took it off too and wrapped it up in the work t-shirt and put both in my gear bag to hide it.

Only the Friday before last, I wore my tanks without any thought, today, I felt extremely exposed not wearing a bra.

And yeah, I get uncomfortable when I'm not wearing my wristwatch too, always have ever since I first started wearing one. I'm weird, I know.

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Curls

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What are those curls that you see on some women right in front of their ears called? They aren't called sideburns. Do they even a have a special name? Sort of like this picture of Kristen Stewart.

http://www.bellasugar.com.au/Photos-Kristen-Stewart-Hair-Up-...

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almost passed out at work

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Well, I've been pushing myself too hard, apparently. Just after 3 am last night, my body decided it had enough, and I nearly collapsed. I caught myself at the last moment, but it was a wake-up call in more ways than one. I'm going to take it very easy the next couple of days, and be as good shape as I can for my appointment with the endo doc on Wednesday. Hugs to all.

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Should I carry on with Football Girl and other stories?

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There are number of reasons why I write, the main ones being because I enjoy doing it and giving pleasure to others. I also love getting comments that reflect that people are moved by my stories. I get a fair number of kudos too, which is the icing on the cake.

But, and there always is a but; increasingly, it appears that I am upsetting some readers. In particular, at the moment, Susan in Football Girl is going through a hard time and things are happening to her that are unpleasant, to say the least.

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2011 - Gabycon

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I think it's fair to say that despite less than perfect weather, those who attended enjoyed themselves. The weather became damp, windy and finally sunny before reverting to wet again over the weekend though we neither allowed it to dampen our spirits or blow our enthusiasm away.

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Gabycon Over

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Well I'm on the way home from Gabycon, where did the time go?

There will be a report midweek but it turned out to be a great weekend, those of you too shy to come missed some excellent food, great company, brilliant sightseeing and loads of brand new Gaby!

Put it in your diary for 2012 so you don't miss out next time!

ttfn

Maddy

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Hatred as a Virtue

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There will be no commenting allowed on this post, I just need to say this.

There's a bill in the legislature here in California that would extend the same protections and presence in educational curricula to sexual orientation and gender variation that are allowed and mandated for religious affiliation, ethnic origin and sex.

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The Family Girl #010: Waiting for the other shoe

The Family Girl Blogs
(aka "The New Working Girl Blogs")

Blog #10: Waiting for the other shoe,
Or, "after 9-11, what next?"

To see all of Bobbie's Family Girl Blogs, click on this link:
http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/book/28818/family-girl-blogs

Since last month, I have been dreading September.   I was informed by the bosses that, because of my recent work, I was put on a short list of middle/upper-middle managers that were supposed to be part of the company's so-called "flying squad."

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extra Gaby

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Well we are all having a great time at Gabycon, Ang has already posted the Con special and there's another Book 7 chapter posted too!

Today we've got more readings for attendees and as the weather is looking good this morning we'll be hitting the beach later - well Chesil isn't exactlty Skegvegas but there's sea and er pebbles!

Bye for now

Maddy

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Oops

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I began writing a new story fleshing it out as I go along. Fifteen pages into it the mother board died. I think it is the mother board. Either that or all four 1 gig memory sticks went bad at the same time. As that is not likely the finger points to the mb. Any way there is a new machine a week or two away. But the story is not backed up. Which means no story because I could not, ever, manage to reconstruct that puppy. The good news is if it was the mother board I can rescue the stuff because the hard drive should be intact.

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The Children of 9/11

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I read a nice article story this week in a UK Newspaper that I access on Line. The Daily Mail.
It was called the Children of 9/11 where the mothers who were pregnant lost their husbands or partners in the horrors of that day.
My hope is they all have happy lives and that they never forget the fathers they never met many of whom were in the wrong place at the wrong time and some who were called upon to save lives.

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Three Years and Still Going - But Not so Strong

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Three years ago, I finally got up the nerve to post the novels I had written up to that point on BCTS. Frankly, I was a bit apprehensive. September 2008 was a big month in many respects. About the same time I started posting The Heart of the Beholder I found out that I had prostate cancer. The night before I went in for what proved to be a horrible ordeal of three weeks in the hospital and three surgeries, I posted the last chapter of The Narragansett Fork. That one is still one of my favorites because that's where I found Fanny.

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Link to the first chapter of IN PLAIN SIGHT.

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I have updated my website and added the Prologue and first chapter of IN PLAIN SIGHT with links to the various Amazon sites.
Tanya's Website Page - IN PLAIN SIGHT
Tanya

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The Family Girl #009: The shopping excursion of death

The Family Girl Blogs
(aka "The New Working Girl Blogs")

Blog #9: The shopping excursion
of death! or  "Killing your credit card
with kindness"

To see all of Bobbie's Family Girl Blogs, click on this link:
http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/book/28818/family-girl-blogs

Last weekend was Labor Day Weekend, as you all know,  which as most know is when sales usually happen.

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NEW TITLE ON AMAZON KINDLE - IN PLAIN SIGHT

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Hi all.

I've please in announcing a new title on Amazon Kindle. I shall be placing a taster on my website later today, but in the meantime check out my page on Amazon here: Tanya's Page

Check out Amazon.com here: In Plain Sight

Check out Amazon.co.uk here: In Plain Sight

Check out Amazon.de here: In Plain Sight

Tanya

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007) OK, which ancestor typoed the last name!?

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I've always told people I'm not a bird, to help them remember how to spell my last name right... Well, apparently my changing hormones are deciding to make a liar of me.

I've been noticing that I've been eating less and less, more and more often. I recently went to 4 "meals" a day, a bagel for breakfast, a sandwich around 11am, another sandwich around 2pm, and a light dinner.

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Katia, my dear Katia

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Katia dear, please behave yourself won't you?

At first when Hurricane Katia came on the scene, I thought for sure that someone at the National Weather Center was a reader on BCTS, and that may be so, but upon doing some more research, found that I did not originat the name at all, but some Greek dude. :(

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Dormice

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Hi,

Anybody know if there who to notify if I've found evidence of dormice? I'm in the West Midlands and was helping my partner sort out our new alotment next to the canal when I spotted a hazelnut, at first I though it was a snail but on closer inspection I found it was a hazelnut that had a hole nibbled in it and the inside was hollow.

I brought it home and looked online and found it looks exactly like the chewed hazelnut of dormice.

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Homecoming, so to speak

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Yesterday was just a little bit rough, with the combination of medicines having an adverse reaction that both made my stomach turn, and dropped my blood pressure to a dangerous level. Both of those issues were resolved safely and without need for a visit to the E.R. thankfully, and this morning I have to admit I’m feeling pretty good all in all. It probably has to do with this being the first time in two months that I’ve truly been able to “feel” like Zoe inside and out. Let me explain. :-)

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housekeeping

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You folks may not have noticed, but I've been doing a little housekeeping on my stories. I've but my "E-girl" universe stories together, and created folders for my essays and my autobiographical works. I'm not entirely sure why I felt the need to do this, must be a touch of OCD .....

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006) ROFL... something in my spam box tickled me.

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So I just checked my email as part of my nightly rounds before going to bed, and as I cleared out the spam box, I casually glanced at it's contents, and intermixed were ads for boosting my boob size and ads for "increase your Testosterone"...

...

Really?

How did I even get on the list for two clearly conflicting advertisements?

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005) Tightened another notch in my belt...

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I now have 31" waist circumference, and 38" hip circumference. Interestingly, since the last time I measured, I lost exactly 1" at the waist, and gained it in the hips. This puts my Waist-to-Hip ratio at 0.82. My old masculine pot-belly is almost completely gone. I'm now wearing my pants and shorts between my hips and waist at a point where the circumference is 32".

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Some Problems

A persistant problem of mine is when I feel bad, I retreat into myself. Depression itself seems to be a forced retreat from the outside world. It makes sense, in a way; depression can come from injury, problems with others, etc. (This is excepting biological/genetic based depression, which actually is just a tendency to become depressed more easily.) When one has health or interpersonal problems, it might be better to withdraw and heal or let group tensions ease.

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Road to Myself 21: On the Road Again

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Road to Myself - 21: On the Road Again
Annette MacGregor

After only being on the road (with work) three weeks out of fifteen months it seems my luck has changed. All of August (except for the week of Vacation) was spent at a client in Pennsylvania. Now, I find myself commuting to the DC area. Working out of town has it's ups and downs!

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Comic book blather, DCs New 52

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DC comics shipped the second week of the ‘New 52’ titles and out of 13,
I picked up seven to give them a shot after being underwhelmed by Justice League #1 last week. The titles available were:

ACTION COMICS #1, ANIMAL MAN #1, BATGIRL #1, BATWING #1, DETECTIVE COMICS #1,
GREEN ARROW #1, HAWK AND DOVE #1, JUSTICE LEAGUE INTERNATIONAL #1, MEN OF WAR #1,OMAC #1, STATIC SHOCK #1, STORMWATCH #1 and SWAMP THING #1.

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Bizarre complaint...

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Imagine you're visiting a coastal town on holiday. This town has a working harbour, so you decide to have a walk along the quay. Now, what would you expect to find on the quayside? Fish, perhaps? This tourist apparently didn't think so...

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"Fleshing" out a story.

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I am trying to get back to writing; reading a few of my old stories to see what I liked and thinking. The first story I published on this site, drew a comment that said something like, you have a nice little story here that needs fleshing out. Another said that my story rambled a lot.

So, I decided that before I forged ahead on finishing my last story, I would try to conduct a little "self seminar" to try to tune myself up. Who knows maybe I need a book called, "A Tune Up For Wanna Be Writers"? :)

Suggestions please?

Hugs

Gwendolyn

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My knees ain't wot they used t' be

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Okay folks, I'll keep this short and sweet ...

As usual, I have good news and bad news. The bad news first to get it out of the way ...

The pain from my neuralgia has flared up again and the doc's doubled my dose. Carbamazepine can cause drowsiness, so if it has any side effects on me, then I'll have to give up my car - bummer. I really love driving, despite the accident.

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The Luck Of The Damned

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Whoo, boy!

Well, in the last month or so things have been cah-RAY-zee for me.

About 25 days ago I turned in my two week's notice at my job at the hotel. I'd just, well, I'd had enough of everything, and of being stuck where I was, and so I decided to push the issue and set myself a date to move back home -- Monday, the fifth of September.

Thinking ahead, I decided to go ahead and fill out an application or two online ahead of time so I'd already have some prospects brewing before the end of my time at the hotel.

This is where things got weird.

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one of my friends at work got hurt last night

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One of the few people at work who is kind enough to call me Dorothy got hurt last night. She's been struggling with back pain the last couple of days (She missed Sunday night because of it), and I guess her back went out again, and she went home halfway through the shift. I hope she'll be okay.

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My Aunt Passed.

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So I just need to get this off my chest, because I absolutely loved her. My Aunt Sandi just passed about 5 minutes ago, unfortunately I wasn't able to say my goodbyes, but I am going up to Washington to attend the funeral this weekend. She has spent the past 20 some odd years battling cancer and tonight it finally won, when she was first diagnosed they gave her 6 months to live and she put up the fight of a lifetime, I am grateful I was able to spend time with such a wonderful woman.

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Feeling better, and about "The Big Mall"

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Well, I'm feeling a touch better today. I'm trying to not look too far ahead, nor worry about the stuff beyond my control, and that's helping.

Meanwhile, I wanted to take a sec and talk about "The Big Mall". Its one of those stories that had a life of its own. My original idea was simple - a woman like me meets the Wizard,, little bit of magic, and a satisfying ending. But my lead character had her own ideas as to what she needed, and finally I had to concede to her wishes. I think it worked out rather well, dont you?

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Discount at LULU

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Lulu are offering 20% off any order delivered to a UK address up until the 9th September, just put code SeptemberUK in the voucher box before you checkout for your savings.

Watch out for more offers for US and EU buyers.

Go to http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/scaramouch to start saving!

Maddy

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Almost the end...

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This is the formal end of our journey into a possible future, although there’s a tiny epilogue still to come, already written, which will be posted at about this time tomorrow. This ‘last’ chapter is a long one, 15,000 words or so, but the epilogue is very handily short, so they shouldn’t be too dreary if one thinks of them as a unit.

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All fine now... and coming to California!

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Hello, Everyone! My heart is singing - once, because the Surgeon did his work well and it's all running smoothly now.... and twice, because I'm well enough to make a first visit to California....... This Friday, arriving at L.A.'s Hollywood Heights Hotel - I hope to audition (joking!) for "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert 2" - oh! if only!!

Love you all! xx Ginger

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Just Say No....To suicide

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There seems to be some "controversy" and concern regarding "Fade to Black," especially the concern for the author. In reality we who are transgendered are more prone to violence, including that which is self inflicted. If you're even thinking about ending it all please make a pledge that you won't. I thank G-d every time I remember those who have made that pledge to me. The violence against us is bad enough without adding to it.

shalimar

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My first short story is posted... caution, very dark

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Just posted my first standalone short story... it is dark but it's been rattling around my brain for some time... re reading Evolution sorta lit the fuse... i'd say enjoy, but this one even creeped me out a little
Diana

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Re: Wren Phoenix

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I just wanted to take a few minutes to let people know the Wren Phoenix is in the hospital and having surgery, I am not sure how long they will be keeping her there but for those that know her it would be nice if you send her a message to let her know that she has friends here that are thinking about her. She can't login to the bigcloset at the moment because of the firewall at the hospital but I sent her a list of web proxies and maybe using one of those she will be able to access the site but either way I am sure she would like to hear from all her friends here at Bigcloset.

Cain129

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Beyogi, Darkice, Slicersv, Anyone! Help, need input!

Fellow beings, Hello. As you may or may not have noticed, i'm a little behind on part 5 of Magnetic Personality. this is more or less because i paid little attention to hard science in school and more attention to science fiction and comic books. well... I've really been trying to understand the fundamental science involved... I've wiki-ed, I've Googled and even asked Jeeves... the basics are making for brain aneurysms in my poor button head, but i want to be fair to those who have, well despised (smiles) my lack of scientific knowledge.

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My little SRU story is nearly ready

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I'm just about ready to publish my little SRU story. Its very different (I think) than anything that has been done in that universe. I rather hope you like it.

By the way, I want to say I'm really proud of all the people who commented on "Justice?" We got a good range of opinions, all well thought out, and yet stayed civil with each other as each person stated our views. Well done, one and all.

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Why cant I just be ME?

For those of you that don't know, Let me start off by stating that I am part of the "AgePlay" or "Littles" or to segregate even more, "LG" and even "AB" communities. For those that don't know, LG stands for Little Girl, or is sometimes known as ALG = Adult Little Girl. AB on the other hand, stands for "Adult Baby".

Within the Age-play/Littles/LG community there are many segregations like LG, for those that feel older than Toddler aged, and generally don't have a need for "padding".

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Cataracts and me.

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Bringing you all up to date. About 8 months ago, I noticed a "blurriness" in my left eye. It went away, but then came back, and for the past few months has been coming and going resulting in moderate fogginess to outright total loss of useful vision in my left eye.

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12-String: Ch-ch-ch-changes

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So, I've finally let one of the people I know in the real world read 12-String. I respect his opinion, and for some reason I can't quite fathom, thinks I might actually be 'good enough.'

We'll have to see, but in the short term that means that I will be making a different form of the first eleven chapters for publishing.

By different, I mean that I will be altering my references to Sarah.

This is in no way meant as a slight to Megan or her story. It is simply a fact of what can work on it's own, and what can't.

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letter from a lost soul

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This started out as a letter to anyone and no one — I’ve never had anyone I could write a letter like this to - but it turned into something else …I’m not sure what you would call it — an desperate cry — a plea for help — or just an aching heart yearning for love.

Letter from a Lost Soul

I know that you will probably not answer this letter back, but I had to tell you that I miss you and Love you. I had such a hard time accepting that you had gone. After I had spent so much of my life trying to find you, I’ve now lost you.

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Need help, please!!!!?

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As you all know that I have been careing for my 84'year old grandmother with my dad for the past well over half a year. Who has been going altzy, unfortunitely its getting worse, and worse and worse. I am on call 24/7 even with dads help it is literally overwhelming us, especially me. I feel like I am about to blow, not scream or hollar but like some serious mental and emotional breakdown. I can't even take a 15 minute shower without her banging on the door for help. the past 3 days alone i must have gotten maybe 8 hours sleep total.

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004) My boobs are sore.

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Let's see how many hits that title gets. LOL.

So yeah, my boobs are sore and tits extra puffy, have been all day today. No sign of strange lumps though, I have a feeling I'm about to grow some more. I also noticed something else over the last couple weeks: my body hair isn't growing back in as quickly, thickly, or coarsely, as it used to...

Anyone who's transitioned find that they noticed their body hair start to change last, or is this something weird with my particular inadvertent diet induced feminizing?

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07) Drew Pattengale told me something interesting...

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Drew Pattengale told me something very interesting at work today, but I'm not sharing.

Ok, ok, I'll give you a hint. When I first started writing Open Your Heart, I had no idea what was causing Pattengale's hormonal imbalance. He told me at work today what it is. But I'm not telling you any more than that! Well, ok, it's not his diet.

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Karen J. in Hospital

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Hello, I'm Karen's brother. Karen was admitted to the hospital last night after an apparent drug overdose. She is out of danger, but will remain in the hospital for at least a couple of weeks, so she won't be around for awhile. She could use your thoughts and prayers.

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About "Justice?"

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I wanted to talk for a moment about my last story, "Justice?" When I started with the idea, I planned to make it two stories - "The Defense" and "The Prosecution" Basically, first we would see her grief at the rape and death of her sister, and her need for some kind of justice. Then we would see the other side - the insanity of trying to take the law into her own hands, and the horror of the method she used to try and punish them. But the story took on a life of its own, and I was left with her awaking to her own guilt, and making the choice to seek the punishment of the law for her actions.

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This would be my first Blog, eh?

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I probably won't do this alot, and honestly I have never, ever, done anything like this before even when told I should by whatever psychologist I was seeing at the time, I just never felt interesting enough to write about what is going on with me. I kind of am on a last thread here and was like, "I have become more active here and less of a lurker, I feel down, I think I will go to Topshelf..." So I end up here and think about my options from the home page, go someplace else, read a story....blog...maybe I will do that for once. So here I am.

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Bike - Cathy's amnesia

Something which has been buzzing round my head for a little while is what happens to us if we suffer Alzheimer's, dementia or some major head injury - would we still retain our new gender or revert back? I don't know the answer and hope never to find out personally, but hence the recent theme in Bike.

Angharad.

05Dolce_Red_l_0.jpg

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Andrews Dilemma Season 2

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Andrew Dilemma season 2 - Jessica's Journey, should be out in the next few days. I just finished part 1 of the story today.

I have been taking a bit of a break and recharging my batteries while trying to find a new direction to take the story.

Cain129

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My (Extra) Ordinary Family -- My Kid Is Transgender" Wednesd

On ABC-TV tonight there will be a show concerning transgendered teen and pre-teens. I have no idea what the bias is or if it is well done. A review can be found at the link below. I also do not know the bias of the review.

The show teaser indicates they will be a MtF and a FtM discussed.

http://jivetalkinmama.tumblr.com/

RAMI

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I'm Not Invisible... Update

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Internet access has been disconnected (along with cable, meaning that, due to a lack of the digital converters, there is a lack of even local programming and effectively no news intake), cutting me off from the larger world, due to a bill payment that someone forgot to make...

>.<

I love life.

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being super hormonal

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I think I've mentioned this before, but I'm a little wigged out by how super hormonal I am - crying one second, laughing the next, total emotional roller-coaster thing. If I'm like this now, what the heck am I going to be like if they let me take estrogen?

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Sorry

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that theres no update again but i'm still waiting on the postman to let me install my new s/h monitor on my PC. (cable in the post)

I will be doing one asap

Mads

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Real Heroes

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Most of you will never have heard of Daniel Morcombe or his family. The Morcombes are a family living on the Sunshine Coast of Queensland...that's about an hour-and-a-half's drive north of Brisbane.

Daniel was a 13-year-old boy who went Christmas shopping eight years ago and never returned. He was last seen at a bus-stop on his way home. His bones and a pair of shoes have just been discovered about twenty miles away from his home in a swamp.

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The Family Girl #008: Blackout No More!

The Family Girl Blogs
(aka "The New Working Girl Blogs")

Blog #8: Blackout No More!

To see all of Bobbie's Family Girl Blogs, click on this link:
http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/book/28818/family-girl-blogs

Power's back on!   Yayyy!

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Totally Bummed; Slightly Optimistic

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I Hate to Cut My Hair!!!

I had two years worth of luscious locks going. It was halfway down my spine.

Sadly, I've been out of work for almost as long. I've got what looks to be a great opportunity coming up. Sadly, I can't even consider going for the job with my lovely coif. Eighteen inches of thick, curly, chestnut hair has been donated to those who might need it more than me.

I just hope it brings as much joy to the new wearers.;)

Love, Hugs, And Blessings,
A Much Shorter Haired Jonelle ;0

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Need help naming some Aliens

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Well, I have introduced a new set of characters into my Katia story and need some help with names. They are about a foot tall, fly, and live in the woods on Malok's home world. So far Malok's race have just considered them to be about the equivalent of mosquitos but have not engaged in an eradication campaign on them, rather choosing to stay away from them.

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Bob

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Im glad that everything has worked out and that Erin has been able to keep Bob's sites up and running this is what he would have wanted. Im glad he touched so many of you and in some way still is. I know he is looking down on us and keeping us all safe. If I know him he probably has heaven with internet access and is keeping an eye on all of his sites.

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Had a nightmare yesterday

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I had a nightmare yesterday. I dreamt I heard a woman's voice telling me to be careful, that "They" were coming close and that I was unarmed. The fear in the voice was enough to wake me, and I found it hard to go back to sleep again. Here's hoping today I sleep better, I don't need to be driving to work drowsy.

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The Family Girl #007: Blackout Bagels

The Family Girl Blogs
(aka "The New Working Girl Blogs")

Blog #7: Blackout Bagels

To see all of Bobbie's Family Girl Blogs, click on this link:
http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/book/28818/family-girl-blogs

Moe hasn't come home yet, which is a good thing, I suppose.   At least she skipped the power blackout.

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Fairytales and you

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For someone who spend almost a year reading books by the Brothers Grimm, I can be dense sometimes. Except for the fact that before I put pen to paper I switched the number from 12 to 16, Fairytale Princess is a retelling of the fairytale The Twelve Dancing Princesses.

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What will they think of next?!

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On the one hand, it's a 16 GB USB flash drive.

On the other, it can also be used in a completely different 'port'.

I'm not entirely sure who'd want to pay $140 for this, and would you really want to use it for one purpose after using it for the other purpose?

Needless to say, there's plenty of joking in the "Best Rated" comments.

Read more to find out what I'm wittering on about: Here's the article (in the Daily Wail, of all places!)

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