I am not one of those people who thinks that "big boys/girls dont cry".

In fact, I think there some times when crying is exactly what you should be doing, and that crying can be good for you.

That said, I prefer to have a reason to cry, so what happened on my way to work last night was frustrating.

Out of the blue, for no reason I could figure, I was suddenly enveloped by grief, and it was all I could do to keep my car on the road until the feeling passed.

Ah, well.

I don't blog normally, because I honestly feel that my problems are miniscule compared to so many on this site. The fact is however, it is a fact with most of us that being transgender is affects our whole being, and sometimes I just want to quit thinking about it!

Today on Fox News an article has come out bashing the state of Oregon for its attempt to help gender dysphoric children with severe issues.
http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2015/07/09/oregon-allowing-1...

This is my list of the best movies ever (in categories):

For several years I have been limping along with a desktop computer that is now 13 years old. That will soon no longer be true. Thanks to the incredible generosity of a fan of my writing, a two year old laptop is on its way to me! I am simply blown away by this act of kindness. It's the kind of thing that makes you realize that, even with all the bad out there, the human race isn't a lost cause. We have a truly amazing family here, and I'm going to try my best, each and every day, to be worthy of it.

Hugs and love to all!
Bree

Yup, after the excitement of Gabycon you get a new chapter today too!

Yes, I use the punctuation version quite frequently.

But I didn't know about the tattoo ....

http://www.upworthy.com/have-you-seen-anyone-with-a-semicolo...

Then they put this crown on your head and turned on the power… it made your eyeballs bleed

The cry rings out, far and wide! I am looking for an artist/illustrator to initially do some character design for my Novel "The Enhanced: TRI" that I am currently posting to BC. If things work out, I would love to adapt my novel into a graphic novel. RSVP here or by PM if you wish.
Cheers,
Diana M. Howe, Moongoddess at Large

Where can I find an explaination, detailed if possible, of what all the stuff is under the "Activity Settings" header in My Account. I don't like settings I don't understand. What I want is to find out how to set that so nothing has changed from the way things were before.

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/petition/executive-order-re...

I have no idea if this will come to fruition, but one can hope, right? I signed. If you're a Vet, or you support Vets, please sign?

Catherine L. Michel

Hi. If anyone has any way of reaching Bek D. Corbin please pass along my desire to see the ending for "Foxglove".

Just posted Chapter Two of TRI. Chapter Three Tomorrow,
Cheers!
Diana M Howe, Moongoddess at Large

And Chapter One is live. Hope my pitiful attempts at formatting don't break the site...don't laugh... i've managed it in the past.
Diana M. Howe, Moongoddess at Large

There is a story I read sometime ago about a teenage boy who was always trying to find out where the cheerleaders where going so some how he was dissappear into the school basement so he followed them he found out that there was a cave under the school there kneel before a goddess and pray to her. So he did the same thing some how he was turn into a girl. The thing is don't know if was here or on another site.hope someone can help thank you

It is my happy duty to inform you that the author known as Scott Ramsey is no more. He has been replaced, by me!

As I've been telling everyone who will listen tonight, this online community is the only place I will ever be me, so it's just plain silly to not have MY name on my stories. I hope you all are as happy for me as I am. I feel ... reborn. Maybe it's silly, but hey, I'll take it!

I usually remember stories pretty well but this one has something to do with a special forces type who rescues a girl from druggies somewhere in central or south america. He kills one (the leader?) on an old stone altar of some kind and the sacrifice/blood awakens a god who changes him....

I wasn't going to blog about this because I know some people get upset at me whenever I do anything, but others have encouraged me to say something and not let the naysayers steal my joy.

The Dress Punishment has just hit 50,000 reads. That's a lot. That is more than I would ever expect, especially on a story that is such a departure from what I usually do. It's humbling, because I didn't think anything I produced could have such a draw. I want to thank the people who read and re-read the story. I'm glad you like it and thank you.

Sorry these didn't get up yesterday as planned, stuff happened. :)

If you've won, let me know what you want done with your prize money. If you got prize money in the earlier version of this contest, I'm sorry but that was it. :)

Oh, and all entrants get a free 3 month subscription to Hatbox. That's probably going to be a feature of ongoing contests.

Hugs,
Erin

Last night was “one of those”. I had an unsettling nightmare that led to me tossing and turning in grim reflection of my life. At my age (67) and given the tumultuous and very public life I’ve had I had plenty to think about. After due consideration I was not surprised that each and every problem I’ve had in my life could be laid at the doorstep of my transgender nature.

Each flaw in my four children sprang from my cross-dressing.

Every set back in my business was due to me being less than 100% male.

I could see her. Plain as day I can see her. At first I thought it was the shadows playing tricks on me or that I was very tired and my mind was conjuring images to keep me from falling asleep where I sit. I could see her, I would stake what little remains of my reputation on it. I could see the one I have seen before but I quite don't know where. I could see the one I know but can't place the name.

Check it out at http://bigclosetr.us/hatbox

Hugs,
Erin, Piper and Cat

P.S. The old hatbox link here: http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/page/21977/hatbox-gateway-page still works for those who subscribed in the past.

E,P&C

Theres a big ole hole in my heart where Buddy Boy used to be.
I miss him so much it hurts. my 17 year old weenie dog went to the happy hunting grounds June 29 2015

May all your bacon be crispy, your pancakes be fluffy and over flowing with maple syrup, your beers be chillin, the poutine be hot and gooey...and a beavertail for dessert.

I looked back but zilch the last few days?

When I was in college, I used to make a play on that old Navy recruiting ad by telling people, "It's not just an adventure, it's my life." These days my life is more of a comic Greek tragedy than an adventure.

Hi
I was reading what was looking to be a great story on BC called Being Diane it was on site for two days and now it's gone (sniff sniff). Does anyone know what happened to it as I was hooked and halfway through.
Regards
Dangling fish

This is for those who can appreciate my devious nature.

So for a long time I have been juggling two theological balls and none of you have realized what my intentions were. I practice as a Muslim and a Mormon and am fairly sincere in my beliefs in both faiths. If you don't understand this, don't worry about it.

I have something to share, but its a little complicated, so please bear with me.

I had ... an experiance? a vision? a stray thought? Not sure, but to explain it I have to do a little history first.

In 1980, Mt. St. Helens erupted in one of the biggest volcanic eruptions in North America in my lifetime. Lava and hot ash burned a huge area and the sky turned grey as far away as Calgary.

But 30 years later, life is returning to the area, and slowly the mountainside is turning back to green.

Only in Japan - 3000 attend funeral of Tama the only feline stationmaster. Next door in China, they eat them - go figure.

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/jun/29/tama-the-cat-30...

I thought the world was a crazy place when I came, but this makes more sense than many of the news stories we see.

This week's PBS Frontline program is titled Growing Up Trans.
Synopsis: A report on transgender children and their parents. Included: medical interventions that are increasingly offered at younger ages.

For me it's on Tuesday 6/30 9:00 PM - 10:30PM CDT. Check you local listings for the night and time in your area. The program will also be available online beginning 6/30 per the preview I just watched.

A story of mine, "The hem of His garment" has been published in an online magazine for LGBT Christians called "Created Gay".

Here is the link:

http://www.createdgay.com/files/magazinejuly2015.pdf

Someone told me that 80% of us who transition regret it, and many return to their old gender. I think this is a lie and am only asking this because of their professed religiosity. I am actually quite happy living as me, the only issue being that I do not look as much of a babe as I would like. And, of course, as usual, the family are consummate asses, but they can bugger off.

I have never seen or spoken to anyone who has done this, though I have read about a couple and their suicide rate was very high.

Later today for a new Gaby publication - Gaby Character Guide.

It's jam packed with illustrations depicting many of the main characters from the main series, covering the first 13 books. There's also a quick synopsis of the Gaby fanfiction as well as some information on locations and the Bond family tree.

So providing I can get an internet connection i'll post more details latert today.

Mads

Guess what time it is?

Its dream sharing time!

Well, my latest was very different. In the dream, I was invited to a church event at someone's house, and going there, I found no one I recognized. I stayed for a while, but I felt so out of place among strangers that I eventually left and started walking around the city to clear my head.

What made it really interesting to me was my reaction to this circumstance. I didn't cry, feel sorry for myself, or anything of the kind. I passed it off as some kind of mistake, and basically let it go.

My latest story just fell into the abyss (off the front page).

It was an average story for me, in that it took about two months to write with considerable research. It received what has become my normal reception, with 111 kudos, 6 comments and 2,966 hits.

I assume about half my hits are unique readers since the story ran over 15k words and isn't easily read in one casual sitting.

...but don't be a d**k about it.

http://youtu.be/0la5DBtOVNI

I believe this is by writer and actor Wil Wheaton (For those old enough he is *also* known for playing Ensign Wesley Crusher in Star Trek Next Generation)

Just a thought that popped up in my head today

Terrible at writing blurbs or ideas for covers. Any inspiration?

Okay, I'm starting to feel frustratingly stuck in terms of my transition. For some reason, I cant get over the hump and take care of my legal name, or wear makeup in public, or lose enough weight to get surgery.

Its like somewhere in my brain something is saying "Look, you've been lucky so far, why push it? Its safe where you are, and you could get hurt if you go further."

I guess I'm just a big scardy-cat.

These statistics are hard to believe.

http://www.statisticbrain.com/reading-statistics/

In 2005 I wrote "Renaming a Highway" that came to Big Closet in 2007. I was right about the problems of race and sexuality when I wrote, "Same shit, different decade." I was wrong when I wrote, " There still some embers, but Mississippi is no longer burning," referring to the 1988 movie, Mississippi Burning The flame of hate is throughout the U. S. We are all to blame. In the end the Romeo and Juliet character Mercutio was right, "Don't ask for whom the bell tolls. It tolls for thee."

shalimar

I'm half way through writing the next episode of Bike when I suddenly realise I hadn't heard the central heating/hot water boiler light up. It's old and noisy. On checking I find it isn't working. Up in the attic to make sure the header tank hasn't run dry - it hadn't. Looks like the boiler may have died of old age. After swearing at the cats because they wanted to see what was going on but know even less about boilers than I do - which is minuscule - I try the immersion heater, which I kept despite the assurances of the plumber I wouldn't need it.

Last night, I read the first few chapters of J.K. Rowling's book, The Casual Vacancy. I know I'm three years late, but my stack of books to read is more ambitious than I am.

While I worked through the pages it occurred to me that the book had a LOT of characters and was written to appeal to someone who likes character-driven novels. Being character-driven restricts her audience from the majority who prefer plot-driven books.

Out of curiosity I checked Amazon this morning.

I was gonna talk about funerals and other fun topics, but I'm concerned about my emotional state. I am starting to worry my anti-depressant isnt working very well any more, as I am getting very fragile for no reason I can think of.

Ah, well.

There was a "Think" radio show on transgender youth.

Monday, June 22, 2015 2:30 PM
[2015-06-22 12:00:00] Transgender children are forced to face the challenges of fitting in at school as they struggle with finding their identity. This hour, we'll talk about how these kids are being helped locally with Dr. Ximena Lopez, Medical Director for the GENder, Education and Care Interdisciplinary Support (GENECIS) program at Children's Medical Center; and psychiatrist Dr. Meredith Chapman, who also works the program.
Media files

I got to spend Father's day with my daughter for a few hours today, and as a gift she gave me a little figurine. Its an elephant dressed as an angel, with a pink robe, pink trimmed wings, a halo, and a pink heart as a shield.

Does my daughter get me, or what?

Happy Fathers Day to everyone here that is a father or was one at one time even if your gender doesn't fit that image any longer.

Hi Everyone;

For those of you who have given up on seeing the completion of "Duty Calls"...

A recent comment attached to chapter 40 of "Duty Calls" prompted me to send a PM in answer. After some thought I felt I should also post a blog to let you know where things stand.

The story is still "in the works" so to speak. My own work has sidetracked me for this past year and appears to be prepared to continue that at least for the rest of this one.

I've been struggling for the past hour, I'm just too tired to finish Bike tonight. More tomorrow, I hope.

Angharad