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The Family Girl #098: Rambling About Dad

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The Family Girl #098: Rambling About Dad
      - Bobbie Cabot


 
I've taken a few days to get back. Things are not yet right for me after my dad died. I think I will never be right. This is my first time to lose family. I don't know if things will ever be like it was again, but Mo said something: why did I expect it to, because it can't - the key is to learn to accept it, and move on. That's not easy, of course. But, nevertheless, one has to. I'm afraid I'm not as strong as others who are able to do that, but, as Mo said, I don't have to do it alone.

For now, it's about putting some distance, and living with it. And also taking joy from our time with our dad. That may take doing since all I can feel at the moment is the loss.

Anyway. This blog is about my dad, and the people I love.


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Things are getting worse here in Alberta

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Things are getting worse here in Alberta.

The provincial government apparently announced that it will no longer cover SRS.

Now, this won't affect me directly, as my health isnt good enough for the surgery, but I feel for any Albertans who were hoping to get it.

But that's not the worst of it. The ruling party is having a convention right now, and one of the ideas being debated is bringing in a bathroom bill, basically banning someone like me from the using the lady's room.

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Duplication

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Not been around much due to health issues, so excuse me if I've missed something. I noticed that the duplication of the front page is still happening. What's up with that?

KJT

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BigCloset TopShelf's October 2024 All Hallow's Eve Contest Winners!


I am posting this up early since I will be unavailable tomorrow. Grats to Everyone ahead of time!
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Discord

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I joined the server, but don't have permission to post or anything. Is there someone I need to message? I'm very new to Discord and only understand some of it so far.

Thanks :)

Frank
@blackcatsdaddy

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Still Homeless but Updates…

So as the headline reads, we are still homeless and living in a 1 room hotel. For those that need a reminder, we prevailed in Family Court a few months back. The judge ruled that our beautiful child should remain in the custody and care of his Mothers.

Now for the latest update. My wife and I just accepted Pre Trial Intervention on a 4th degree (instead of 2nd degree) charge. I’m not going to put the details here but at the end of our probation we will be able to have all the records expunged.

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End of Month but not of Bills

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Bills are due and funds are very low. Ad revenue is way down since BFS has had to cut back on advertising. If you can give their ads a look, some of their merchandise might be what you're looking for.

Any financial help will be appreciated.

Thanks to everyone who has sent money. We really depend on you, more than you know. :)

Thanks for any amount you can send. All contributions are very welcome. Thanks a great deal to all who have previously contributed here or paid for a membership at Patreon or Hatbox.


Many thanks!

Hugs,
Erin, Piper, Jamie, Cat, Ashly, Rasufelle and the rest of the crew

Below are versions of the PayPal links.

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surviving being triggered

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while the term Triggered has been co-opted, I can think of no other word to describe what happened to me today.

I was doing laundry, and reading a book, when a particular passage in it set off memories of what happened to me as a child.

It took me a while, but I managed to get through it.

That said, I am accepting all hugs right now.

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Chat is fun

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There is a link on the side bar to a discord chat. Free to join just read the rules carefully so you can type.

That said there is a common theme, of sorts, lately.

I can’t write….

My stories seem too short
I can’t write longer.
I wanna write longer chapters but they always end up….

I may not be able to help you unjam yourself but I can help you write fuller stories.

DESCRIPTION!

Just painting a picture can take a sentence and make it story all on its own.

Here’s a common sentence used many times in many stories.

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Being treated like a woman.

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Today, as I sat in my car after grocery shopping. It occurred to me that once again, I had an offer of assistance from a man as I was hoisting 40# box of kitty litter into my cart. I already had it lifted to the top of the basket so that it rested there as I braced to put inside. I said, "I've got the hard part done, but thank you anyway."

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The October 2024 All Hallow's Eve Contest has Ended

The contest officially ended on Friday morning Eastern time at 3 am / midnight Thursday Pacific time. I went ahead and added Su Shi's and Marianne G's Late entries to the list and voting module, but a ton of people have already voted :/ I am hoping that for my Christmas contest you will enter earlier perhaps? To let people vote on your entries? I thought I had written the rules clearly :(

I am crossing my fingers and hoping for both of you.

Sephrena

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Parts are parts!

Parting is such sweet sorrow...yet a party can be great fun! What a difference just one letter makes...

Anyway, I remembered that I'd promised to indicate when the different 'parts' of the new book Hope's Light had been posted, for those readers who prefer the previous posting method of many chapters at once which allowed binging the story in larger bursts. As such, yep, Part One is indeed completely posted! It completes with Chapter Four: Enemies.

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Something for Halloween

So I've been asked and because its not on either here or Kindle anymore, I decided to do a little treat for Halloween.

https://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/book-page/32478/fairest

Enjoy some good old fashioned Werewolf fun in a small town called Ravencrest :D.

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October Contest

I only just go back on the weekend so I hope that the story I have just posted gets into the contest - does it close tomorrow?

I know that the stories are supposed to be horror tales, but "Planter's Moon" is really only a horror to the lead character.

Please post any thoughts under the story.

Maryanne

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Another Mental Health self-help resource

Through the recommendations by the YouTube algorithm I “stumbled” upon another self-help resource that can help me with my mental health challenges. And I want to share that resource with the rest of our community here, since so many have expressed their personal struggle with mental health challenges.

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Coming out

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A thing happened today. After screwing, glueing, nailing my courage to the sticking place, and procrastinating like a pro, I came out to my wife of 40 years. She took it well. We still love each other, and she declared my feminine side irrelevant to our relationship, though she reserved the right to take the piss at any of my antics.
Hands still shaking.

Love to all.

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Letter to an Absent Friend

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Bob,

I have no idea where to send this, but I have to write it anyway.

You did so much, for so many people. You took care of so many things and yet you forgot one thing. Dammit, why couldn't spare a bit of that for yourself?

But that wouldn't have been you, would it? You always were one of the most giving, unselfish people I'd ever known. You helped people you barely knew and asked for nothing in return.

Dammit again, why, why couldn't you just spend a little of that to take care of yourself?

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Anti-Trans

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To date, in October, the Trump campaign has spent about $60 million on ads, a full third of which has been spent on anti-trans ads.

The ads largely accuse Harris of supporting the US constitution when she was an attorney general by supporting inmates' rights to needed surgery. The ads fail to mention that gender-affirming surgery was performed for federal inmates during the TRUMP administration's time in Washington.

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A “Touch Starved” person in Germany

Today one of the “Random Solo” recommendations was Touch Starved by Bailey Summers (her main story content page is here). We would all do well read this powerful, raw and painful story. Despite the “Adult Oriented” rating this story is absolutely NOT erotica, graphic sex or porn, but just pure emotional pain and desperation, that fortunately ends in a glimmer of hope.

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A shift in my dreams

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Okay so for some reason I have noticed a change in my dreams, in terms of where they take place.

See a lot of my dreams have taken place at or near my old high school in Calgary, but lately, I have been having dreams set on my grandparent's farm, which was just north of a little town called Redwater, which was itself just north of Edmonton. I dont know if this means anything, but it is kind of interesting.

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Blogging the log tables

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I grew up in the Imperial Valley, the southeast corner of California. Big farming area in a desert.

My dad worked for the Imperial Irrigation District as a zanjero, a ditch rider. Farmers and other water-users like cities and industries buy water, which is delivered through a series of canals, originating in the Colorado River 70 to 100 miles away. They have done this for about 100 years.

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To shoe, or not to shoe……..

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I was perusing some older stories this evening - as I often do. A comment by another reader at the end of a current story got me started looking at an older story I had not seen before, which in turn led me to going through an author’s previous works. As a coincidence, it was an author whose work I had read quite a lot of before, but I decided to go through some of her solo work I had not previously read. I tend to be attracted more to multi-part stories or serials rather than solo stories, and as such I had ignored her solo works for the most part, much to my loss.

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Yesterday was my 39th wedding anniversary……..

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Yeah, 39 years……… probably 38 more than I deserve, lol.

I fully expected that my marriage was over a decade ago when my spouse and I had our first discussion about my gender dysphoria. And then again multiple times after that, but especially when I told her I was going to transition.

We had gone through a lot, between my time in the service and the ensuing issues it left, to my civilian career which kept me away from home about 75 to 80% of the time, and then eventually due to my gender issues.

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PB's Notes of A Journey Trilogy +1!

PB, whom way back in 2008 posted Notes of a Journey Trilogy over on Maddy Belle's site, has had their pages here on BCTS recently updated to reflect that their sales, no longer with LULU.com, are now with Amazon.com! I had to redo every page! ><

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Interview: Hilary Cass 6 months on

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Six months after her report into gender care for children, BBC Women's Hour interviewed Hilary Cass
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m0023q2z

What I hear in this interview is not what I expected after reading much of what I read about the report.

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Hope's Light - Dramatis Personae

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Considering the complexity of this saga, readers earlier requested a listing of characters. So here's an update for Book 6! Thanks all!

 

Warning!

If you have not read Books 1-5 (Into The Light, Light's Promise, Call of the Light, Light and Shadow, and The Light Between) then the list below will contain spoilers!!

 

The tale starts here: Into The Light. Hope you enjoy!

 

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Done

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I'm grateful to so many at BCTS. Giving it a try at never returning. I'm not Transgendered.

I've used the names Ahabidah and Gwen Brown. Some of you know my dead name.

Should anyone wish to contact me, my real email is: [email protected]

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I need to be alone, but get sick from being lonely

I have been struggling for a long time on how to formulate this post on a deeply personal issue. While sharing this personal struggle that is affecting my own mental health, it is also a request (maybe even a cry) for help to members of this community located towards the north-west of Germany.

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Excerpt From _Angel of Peace_

"You're writing a book?

"Many newspeople do. Most don't get published."

"I doubt there's much about me you don't already know."

"What about your time in the First World War?"

"That didn't last very long, and in most ways was unremarkable."

"You did fight in the trenches, though."

"For a short period."

"What do you remember about that? Does anything stand out?"

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TBFS & AACD -- What's Your Big Idea

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For many years The Breast Form Store and more recently, All About Crossdressers have sponsored BC.

What they pay in fees augments and supplements the donations. Their sponsorship has been essential.

Joanne, Emma, and I have been talking about holding some sort of writing event to thank TBFS and AACD. We would like to raise awareness and ultimately drive more customers to them.

Do you have any ideas about what kind of event we should sponsor?

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I Watch Too Much TV

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Lately, there have been a lot of PSAs regarding getting your vaccinations updated.

The ads involve celebrities who have multiple vaccinations during the same visit to a pharmacy.

Perhaps to show "knucklehead" solidarity with my governor I had my annual covid, flu and RSV yesterday afternoon.

Based on how I feel today that was not one of my better ideas!

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The September 2024 AACD Caption Story Contest: Poll Results!

The results are in!

First of all, another big thank-you to all of our entrants. it means a lot to us that you would all take the time to do this, and it helps not only us, but also our friends at The Breast Form Store and AllAboutCD.

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Concerns for the Future

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I have had health issues for a long time having heart and diabetes concerns. I recently have had another heart stent put in. I am doing well, but in case my stories should stop or writing problems creep into my stories more. I want you to know this community is important to me.

Since I have limited support from family, you will not likely know if something happens.

Love,
Jessie C/Bruce

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A Question for Commenters

Comments and feedback.

I want to ask a question:

Commenters, guests, authors. What are the things that make you WANT to comment on a story? What kinds of things do you need to see, need to be able to talk about, to make commenting worthwhile?

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A different sad state: NC

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Asheville, North Carolina, is a tolerant and artistic town. I can imagine that there are BC readers or authors who were there or nearby and are now struggling. Let us hope they are alive and able to recover, and if we learn of anyone, do what we can to help them.

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Sad State

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You know, since I began here at BCTS, I have seen a gradual changeover of the readership. It's in the tastes of the types of fiction that they like. We went from one day being a site that had readers starved for fiction, to one where now something barely even gets read much less commented on.
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Now that "Charlotte' is done...

It was a relief to finish Charlotte Had A Boyfriend. It was a lot more work than it may seem. For many weeks, writing it was my full-time job. Seriously. I've never worked this hard on a story before. Something changed in my approach. I'm not going to quantify or explain it, except to say that my writing method or strategy or technique has gotten more defined. Easier in many ways, but it takes longer.

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October Story Entry: The Code is Veronica

I am going to throw my proverbial hat into the ring with this year's October contest...
A girl is cast into the nightmare world of a new high school and the terrors within.

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"The Green Fog" by Susan Brown.

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I have always thought that "The Green Fog", was an absolutely riveting tale. Today, I started to wonder if any movie Producer had taken up the torch and decided to make it a Movie? If I knew someone in that business, I would most definitely approach them. Is "Hallmark" still doing movies. It would make a great children's movie despite it having adult content once or twice.

It is absolutely heart wrenching. I only wish....

Ahabidah, Gwen Brown.

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Hope's Light Teaser!

Well folks, the editing and proofreading of Hope's Light is going great, thanks to our very own Kimmie going (again!) above and beyond while her Inbox gets filled with updates! One proofreading pass has completed, and we're doing (well, Kimmie is doing!) the second round!!

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The September 2024 AACD Caption Story Contest Poll is Live

My apologies on how long this took folks! Not to say too much, but there's been some Personal Stuff in my life that's gotten in the way of us getting this taken care of this past week.

That said, without further ado, the poll for the winner of the September AACD Caption Story Contest is now live over on the Patreon page. Anyone should be able to vote, so we hope people take the time to let us know what their favorite stories were!

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Open Arms Chapter 2: Someone

I apologize not working on any of my ideas in a timely matter...
I have had a little bit of inspiration to work on "Open Arms", a prequal to "Circle in the Sand" and "Release Me."
I may be able to post it later on this week, or at least by the weekend along with the last chapter of "I Don't Like You".
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gender euphoria

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Since yesterday was my laundry day, and most of my non-winter pants were already in my laundry basket, I pulled out a skirt, and because it was a bit cool, I also put on a pair of pantyhose.

Now, despite what my friend Jaci says about me being a girly girl, I do this far less often than you might think, but yesterday I found myself wondering why that is.

Because I felt good.

Tension I didn't even realize I had left me.

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Computer woes

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I was just about to work on a new story, at 3 am PDT (USA), I think about 11 am GMT. Suddenly the computer went dead. At first I thought it was my wireless mouse, but after I mucked about for nearly an hour, I found that unplugging it all, letting it sit, and re starting everything, it is all fine.

I did order a new mouse since the led in my present one no longer works.

Ahabidah, Gwen Brown

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Unspecified Blood Infection

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I simply can not say how this happened. All the Medical Provider will indicate to me is that I have a Blood infection of of unspecified origin. What with all the different strains of Covid mucking around it is not surprising. For years doomsayers have been preaching the end of Earth through various means.

This isn't surprising to me. There are three major hospitals near to me and a half dozen others.

It's gotten to the point that any time I go out, I wear a mask. Thankfully, I found some pretty flowery masks that do not look quite as awful as most.

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Google mucking about with updates

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I woke up this morning with needing to deal with SOMEONE, Goofle once (again ???). Perhaps what happened is merely a minor disturbance in the force. Their little ARMY was simply "Being All They Could Be". I'll get over it.

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Will and Harper

Will Ferrell takes a road trip with a longtime friend who has recently come out as trans.

When I first heard about this movie on Netflix, I cringed.

I visualized a combination of Ron Burgundy and Elf riding across our country with Priscilla, queen of the desert.

What I saw last night was a thoughtful discussion of our shared predicaments.

The documentary presented an elderly transwoman who had suffered greatly for absolutely no reason other than willful ignorance and bigotry.

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Deep thoughts at the swimming pool.

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So I went swimming today, and while in the pool, I found myself thinking about 2 moments from my childhood.

The first involved a time when I was high school, I was curious about the name for the pants worn by Madonna (they were Capri pants, in case you were wondering) and had asked a gaggle of girls, when one growled at me and asked if I wanted to know so I could buy a pair to wear.

I was taken aback by her anger, because I didnt know why at the time.

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Julio and Roomiette by Erin Halfelven on Patreon

I looked up from the computer when my roomie came in and closed the door behind him.

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Julio and Roomiette
A Seduction
by Erin Halfelven
On Patreon for Paid Members
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Rethinking strategies in a relationship that changes

Many of us who struggle with gender identity also struggle with many other emotional issues and even neurodivergence. There is PTSD, ADHD, OCD, autism spectrum, depression and anxiety, to name some of the heavies. That list is most definitely not exhaustive, but it contains the issues that are most prevalent and/or that cause the most collateral issues for us.

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Transgender Suicide is up Seventy Percent

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When all hope of living the life they are driven to find and live, there is only one final solution.

Nothing I can write will make this go away nor make it better. The transgender suicide rate already was more than all other classes of people combined. We need understanding, we need support, we need to be able to live our life the same as anyone else. God give me guidance what I need to do to support these girls. What more can I do to tell the world they don't chose transgender. It is not a choice for them.

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I am sorry everybody

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I was really hoping to have an entry for the Halloween contest, but my brain has decided to douse me in depression, which has cut off my writing spoons.

maybe I will get lucky and it will lift in time for me to finish the story, but I just dont know.

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Just Be Aware

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Much of the so-called "News" items being published at the moment is being sourced from The Dailly Mail. You should know that this paper is no friend to the LGBT+ community and is politically extremely right-wing, including backing the UKIP party at recent elections. That is Nigel Farage's organization.

They are posting a lot of "news" about the USA elections. Treat with a very large grain of salt.

I hope this doesn't contravene the site's restrictions.

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It's not my place to tell people what to do

But someone took the time to write an homage-sequel, or an homagequel if you will, to an old forgotten story which was poorly written by an amateur writer and expertly revised by a talented and kindhearted editor.

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A very unBruish Bru story coming up

Think about what you believe characterizes a Bru story. Now forget that. This story is not anything like that. For one thing it’s > 22 000 words long.

I will post it within the next few days when I have looked at the feed-back that Jill (Angela Rasch) very kindly has given me.

Otherwise it’s really Sephrena that you have to thank (blame?) for me finally completing this story.

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Funding this site

It seems that hardly a week goes by without a request for money.
Come on people, open those purses and wallets. Erin and her team need our support.
I've donated $200 this month. I've had to put off getting a replacement tyre for my bike until next month.
If we don't support the site then it will go away and will be a huge loss to the community.
Dig deep people.

Please...

Samantha

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