Autobiographical

slowly recovering and being a delivery girl

Blog About: 

Author: 

a health update: most of my flu symptoms have ended except I have a runny nose, and its hard to complain about that when I have felt so bad the last couple of days.

I have also started working on a new story, which has started out being something more appropriate to Halloween than now, which has me thinking once more that I am not the creator of my stories, they just arrive, and my only job is to be a good delivery girl and pass them on.

Anyway, that's my update for now..

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

not a stellar day today, I fear

Blog About: 

Author: 

I am suffering from déjà vu today. I feel like I'm stuck in a loop doing the same things over and over.

you add in the fact I threw up last night, my joints are killing me, and I had a head cold, today is not looking like a stellar day.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

I am doing it for the right reasons?

I wonder if I am going to be doing my SRS/GRS for the right reasons. My friend mentioned that if you are not doing it for the sex, then why do you do it?
No I might hope that I could have a sexual relationship, given my age and my social awkwardness, it seems unlikely to ever happen.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

I became disoriented yesterday

Blog About: 

Author: 

well, yesterday was a scary day. I was helping Sharon do some running around, and suddenly I had no idea which direction we were facing or what avenue was closest.

Sharon helped get me reoriented, so all safe, but its one more sign my brain has serious issues

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

there went my good mood

Blog About: 

Author: 

Well, my good mood has gone pop. after I posted on Facebook about the gift I got this year, I got this reply from my sister in law: "It's a shame that after the love and grace received thought your brother deserved no card, nor gift but a black lump of coal. It's even more a shame he expected no better treatment."

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

my Christmas miracle

Blog About: 

Author: 

Well, after listening to all the advice I was given, I will share my Christmas miracle.

To give some context, before my transition I was terrified that I would lose the people I loved if I came out, and of course that did not happen.

Despite that, there two people with deep concerns about what I was doing and why, my brother and sister-in-law.

Honestly I was just glad they were not actively trying to stop me.

Which brings us to Christmas.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

I have a dilemma and I need your help

Blog About: 

Author: 

I'm facing a moral dilemma and I need everybody's help.

See, I had something very good happen to me yesterday, and originally I planned to come here and share it at full volume, but then I started thinking.

I'm already much better off than a lot of the people here, at least in terms of how accepting their loved ones are of the gender stuff, and I started to wonder if me sharing would make those people feel worse about their own situations.

And since I don't want to hurt anybody, should maybe I just . . . not share?

Advice please?

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Jingle Bells

Blog About: 

Author: 

I needed a bit of cheer, December has been a bit 2nd rate so far, and remembered that I should have had the cheap Christmas earrings out this week. (digs the box out) Well, they had the desired effect. Wife, Mum, and work are getting used to my little eccentricities now, for which I am grateful and appreciate that I am lucky in that respect. Anyway, jingle jingle! Frequent head shakes to hear them :-)

xmas2021.jpg

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Comments on Moments of Madness - a reach out to give support to others.

I wanted to comment on my story, "Moments of Madness", and offer some support to people who might feel similar, even if different, to how I felt at that time.

I am reposting the story mainly because I needed to fix it up and get it out there again. This is mostly because it is to help me and my feelings I have now, but maybe someone who reads it might feel a connection, and it might help them, perhaps.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Military dream

Blog About: 

Author: 

Okay so last night I dreamed I was one of a group of teens at a day camp studying to become cadets so they could enter the military after high school.

We studied military history, specifically Julius Caesar, and at the end of the camp all the cadets were in dress uniforms for the trip home.

But their uniforms included what I can only describe as a skirt. Not a kilt, but a plain red skirt with white stripes on the sides. Yes, boys and girls were in this outfit.

Wish fulfillment, maybe?

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Bad day

Blog About: 

Author: 

But today was a bad day.

After a nice Saturday with Sharon and Sam, including a gift exchange, we were surprised when Sharon called us and said she'd left a bag at a drug store.

So this afternoon we went down there, picked them up, took them to the store, and got the bag, and then Sharon said she needed to go to a local mall. I assumed it was some last minute shopping but when we got there she asked how long she and Sam could take in the mall, and feeling slightly boxed in, I said they could have an hour, and mom said they could have an hour and a half.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

New experience

Blog About: 

Author: 

I'm not really hundred percent sure of this it was pretty incredibly strange. As an American living in the UK, it was something I'd heard a little about but not seen before. I'm of course talking about what I guess can only be called a British theatrical tradition the British pantomime. My family tried to explain it to me but I guess didn't really know where to start especially the pantomime dame. I have to admit a lot of it went over my head probably a lot of that was due to being deaf.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

a change in my dreams

Blog About: 

Author: 

I had a really crazy dream last night.

It started with me being at a university, and one of the students, a young black man, gave me his coat. I put it on, turned a corner, and suddenly I was the only white person I saw in the halls. I went back and found the young man and gave him the coat back, and then I "jumped" into a new situation.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Good King Wenceslas looked out...

on the feast of Stephen. there were all sorts of exotic goodies, Stephen really had pulled out all the stops, blackbird pie, crab apples but he must've of misread the recipe for pigs in blankets - the swineherd was fighting a losing battle trying to keep his charges wrapped!

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Double Dream

Blog About: 

Author: 

I'm sure you've seen enough TV to know what I mean if I say a show is a "doctor show" or a "lawyer show".

But what about a show that's both?

That was the dream I had last night. In the first half of the dream, I was a lawyer fighting to get a client a fair trial.

And then without warning I was suddenly in a hospital listening to a lecture on a new surgical procedure.

Don't ask me folks, I just do the dreaming.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Very Ill.

Blog About: 

Author: 

Probably due to all the inactivity of the last two years from Covid and all, I am very ill with Cellulitis that has gotten quite serious. I'm not hospitalized yet but am on very strong Antibiotics and other strange potions. Not feeling well at all.

Just in case, I wanted to thank so many of you for being so kind and loving to me in the last many years. Thank you.

Merry Christmas and blessings to you all.

Gwen Brown

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Urgent! Need Council.

Blog About: 

Author: 

In about 4 hours, my 54 year old son, a Missionary, will be at my Apartment. We have not been on good terms despite my opinion that I do not agree that my belief does not condemn me. (Isa 56:4-5, and Matt 19:12) . I live as a woman and dress as such 100% of the time. I've even worked out how to ride my electric bike with an ankle length skirt on.

I could wear pants but my breasts are rather nice and too large to hide. I'm XXY and when I started Estrodial my body really liked it.

Pants, or no?

Gwen

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Family update

Blog About: 

Author: 

Well, Sharon has decided to leave her job as a school custodian.

Between her reluctance to get vaccinated, and the fact that her doctor has told her she needs to cut back because of heart issues, she will be leaving Edmonton Public Schools at the end of December.

She has arranged that in the new year she will be working as a cleaner in a home three days a week.

I hope she's thought this all through, and knows how to get extra support if she needs it, as I simply do not have the funds to help.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

NO PANTS EVER !

Blog About: 

Author: 

Here where I live, perhaps 1 in 10 women wear skirts on the street no matter the season. It seems that T girls try harder and usually wear skirts. Why do we clock each other so easily?

In the time I've been out, I seldom wear pants, and if I do, I have Nursing Uniform pants that are very loose in the hips and wide legs. I own a couple pair of Jeans and can't remember when I last wore them. I'm sure that part of my hatred of pants could be owing to all the years I could not wear skirts perhaps.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

HappyThanksgiving

Blog About: 

Author: 

Happy Thanksgiving to those in the US and Happy Thursday to everyone else. :)

I'm leaving for a four-day vacation in about an hour, going to San Diego for Comic-Con Special Edition, first con I've gone to in more than four years. It's just a nearly straight ride down the freeway and I have a hotel only a few blocks from the Convention Center.

I'm fully vaccinated and boosted and everyone else has to be to get inside so it should be pretty safe.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Just an odd question

Blog About: 

Author: 

I have just arrived back from a short break where I got to be "Leeanna" . I was staying on my own for a few days. I dressed for extended periods and even went out for a walk.

Like many of the ladies on here to a varying degree, I realised I wanted to be a girl when I was young. Around five years old in my case.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

I was girl accomplishing things today

Blog About: 

Author: 

well, I accomplished some stuff today.

I got my eye exam done and new glasses ordered, I got my laundry done, and I went through all the paperwork in my paperwork drawer and put what I need to keep in an accordion file and threw out the rest.

so not bad.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Big Blizzard

Blog About: 

Author: 

we had a huge blizzard yesterday, so my brother and I spent about 2 hours between yesterday and today clearing it enough for our cars to be able to get out.

Once again, I'm reminded just how much I depend on him, as I would have taken 5 hours or more by myself.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

learning about my manic phase

Blog About: 

Author: 

Okay so I've been trying to be mindful of my emotional state during my current manic phase, and I think I found out something. I'm more suspectable to anger while manic.

I guess this makes sense, since I've seen people who are normally mild mannered turn angry and hostile after say having a few drinks.

So that's something I'm going to have to watch out for, but at least now I know it can happen.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Remembrance Sunday

As usual in the UK, the authorities, to avoid upsetting business, once more have us 'celebrating' a National day not on the day itself but on the following weekend, today then, the National mourning for those lost and injured in military conflict kicked off at 11.00am this morning. I always try to observe the 2 minute silence, its not always possible but this year a pause in the day's DIY efforts was enoiugh to take part and to see those in power doing their symbolic wreath laying at the Cenotaph in central London.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

I think I hallucinated yesterday

Blog About: 

Author: 

Okay, so I think I hallucinated yesterday.

For some reason I looked at my left hand palm side up, and I saw a bunch of fine scratches. Nothing new about finding scratches, I do that to myself all the time and don't remember when, but then, a couple of hours later I looked again . . .

No scratches. No signs there had ever been scratches there.

I don't quite know what to make of this, folks . . .

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

got some stuff done today, but at a cost.

Blog About: 

Author: 

Well, I got some things done today, but at a cost.

I helped sweep out the grate, and went to try and get my meds. I got the one med, but the blister pack wont be ready until Friday. By the time I was coming home I was crying from knee pain.

Then I had to somehow get things under control so I could drive south and pick up Sam at work.

Ah, well.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

very frustrating day

Blog About: 

Author: 

I have had a super frustrating day.

Sharon originally asked us to come down at 9 AM so Sam could give her boss a direct deposit slip - only to call us just before we left to come down at 11 30 instead, then she called at 1030 and asked if we were on the way yet - it only takes us 20 min to get there.

then we get to Sam's work, and since its a pizza place nobody was there yet so we had to go to the mall so they could kill time until the manager would be there.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Emotional Mindfulness

Blog About: 

Author: 

I've been trying to monitor my emotional state in terms of my bipolar issues, and I think I have discovered something.

I had assumed that my cycle followed a simple pattern - a slow curve up during my manic phase, followed by a slow curve down during my depression phase.

Apparently, its a bit more complicated than that.

During my current manic phase, I've had a couple of what I'm going to call "quick drops" - times when my mood suddenly went way down.

Click Like or Love to appropriately show your appreciation for this post:

Pages

Subscribe to Autobiographical