A spokesperson of the local NHS trust, said,"This is the first I've heard of this case and I can categorically assure people in this area that those patients who are diagnosed with Gender Identity Disorder, receive the treatment concommmitant with the diagnosis and recommendation of the doctors involved. However, the numbers of genuine transsexual people are relatively small."

Easy As Falling Off A Bike.
by Angharad.
part 202.

I came down to breakfast a little late, having been disturbed by a nasty dream. I was juggling dormice for a living and was being pursued by a nasty tabloid reporter who rode a bike too. He was faster than I was and each time I tried to escape he chased me down. He also threatened Spike, which was when I woke up crying. It sounds silly I know, but at two in the morning, it seemed genuinely scary, especially as his bike was total crap compared to my Scott and he still out rode me!

I washed and dressed and went to breakfast. Tom and Stella were deep in discussion. "Here's our resident expert," said Stella.

"On what?" I asked yawning.

"On being transgendered or however GID people want to describe it these days," Stella sounded irritated.

"I'm no expert on it," I declared.

"Read this," she passed me a short article in the local paper.

'Portsmouth Man Wants To Be A Woman.

Ken Young(46)claimed that doctors in Portsmouth were not taking his desire to be changed into a woman seriously. He claimed that, 'It's okay for young and pretty things like Lady Muck the 'dormouse woman'(We featured a story on this several weeks ago)to get sex changes, but for older and 'uglier' men, the doctors actively obstructed his treatment and right to have the operation.

A spokesperson of the local NHS trust, said,"This is the first I've heard of this case and I can categorically assure people in this area that those patients who are diagnosed with Gender Identity Disorder, receive the treatment concommmitant with the diagnosis and recommendation of the doctors involved. However, the numbers of genuine transsexual people are relatively small."

A spokeswoman for Transgendered Britain, a charity and pressure group for 'trans' people, said, "As far as we know, People in Portsmouth get a reasonable service from the NHS regarding reassignment and assessment, though things could always be better. There are lots of people who feel transgendered but who don't want to do anything about it for all sorts of reasons, not that changing over or surgery are the only options. There are also quite a few who think they are transsexual and are either deluding themselves, because it's part of some other mental problem, or who are failures in their original sex and they think life would be easier on the other side of the equation. They are invariably wrong."

Ken, who wants people to call him Kendra, still feels he's been hard done by and will be writing to his MP to protest.'

"So the 'dormouse woman' is alive and well, I see." Was my only comment.

"He looks about six foot five and the proverbial brick shithouse comes to mind," Stella was very critical.

"Yeah but how can you diagnose someone from a newspaper article?" I asked.

"I've seen them in Casualty, where they start to do the job themselves, see a bit of blood, discover it hurts more than they thought and call an ambulance."

"Well I suspect some might get desperate enough to try a bit of DIY."

"Cathy, most of them were pissed or barking. Surely they realise that someone who tries a self op job is going to be seen as unstable by their trick cyclist anyway. So will probably never be referred."

"I suppose I hadn't thought about that."

"I see one in clinic now, has had three operations since he mutilated himself. He lost one testicle and has massive scarring on his penis, which has now developed a kink to the one side."

"Like the Old Man of Kent?" offered Tom.

"Who?" I said.

"There was an old man of kent,
Whose tool was exceedingly bent,
To save himself trouble
He stuck it in double,
Instead of coming he went!"

"I wish I hadn't asked now," I said after groaning.

"The man from Devizes is better," suggested Tom.

"I think I can live with the uncertainty," I reassured him to prevent more rude rhymes.

"It was a young woman of Devizes we used to sing at the rugby club," said Stella.

"Oh God, these aren't rugby songs?"

"Of course, how do you think Tom knows them?"

"I'm more concerned how you know them," I said to Stella.

"Simon played rugby, he's also my brother, ergo I went to the rugby club as a visitor. Some have women members anyway, some even run women's sides. Remember, there is talk that they are going to make bicycles for women one day."

"Ha ha, okay point taken. Now what about this article?"

"Well he's a waste of time isn't he?"

"I don't know, he may feel the same as me."

"He might, but whereas you pass as an ordinary woman..."

"I object to that, Cathy is a rather beautiful woman," interrupted Tom.

"Okay, Cathy passes better than most real women, that man mountain in the paper won't. They can't lop a foot off his height or make him less wide, and he'd need a head transplant. He looks like a pig who met a bulldozer at speed, head-on."

I was blushing, "I think you're being very hurtful to him."

"Cathy, I'm being realistic. He hasn't got a prayer of making it." She looked at the date on the paper, "No, it isn't April first."

I looked askance at her.

"I wondered if it was an April fool's thing."

"I still think you are being mean."

"He referred to you as, 'Lady Muck', which makes him a toad in my book, he also looks the part, assuming a toad could actually have that much hair on its face."

Tom sniggered. Then he pointed at the sideboard behind me, "Bible," was all he said.

"Make sure you read the King James version, the more modern ones aren't as poetic," said Stella.