Easy As Falling Off A Train
by Angharad
part 226.

The next morning we were all buzzing with the prospect of Stella coming home. I cleaned her room and changed her bedding and Tom came home with some flowers for her. I got the job of arranging them - why? 'Cos I'm a girl! The logic of men sometimes drives me crazy.

Anyway I did arrange them and was very pleased with the result, now it was only a question of getting her home before they died!

Tom and I went to the supermarket and bought another chicken. "You don't think this is tempting providence?" I asked him.

"About what?"

"Well, we don't know for sure she's coming home today, do we?"

"It's friday."

"I know that."

"She will."

"How can you say that?"

"How can I say what?"

This is the man who accuses me of being obtuse! "That she'll be home today."

"Because it's friday."

"Aarrrghhhh! We've been here before. What has friday got to do with it?"

"They kick 'em out on fridays if they can, reduces staff need over the weekend."

"Oh, I hadn't thought of that," it kind of made sense.

"That is obvious, women, ha!" He walked on down the aisle of the supermarket.

One of these days Tom Agnew! I turned around and suddenly realised he'd gone plus the trolley, damn this icecream was cold!

He was in the dog and catfood aisle stocking up on tins of food for Kiki.

"You spoil that dog."

"Of course I do. She's my pet and she doesn't talk back."

"When I get a place of my own, I want a cat."

"So it can kill all the dormice?"

"Very funny. Cats are very unlikely to do that, the dormice are more at risk from stoats or even rats."

"Bloody things!"

"Which?"

"All those bloody buck toothed things. Da, What's up Doc?"

"Very funny. How did you manage to get the funding to lead this mammal survey, you're not even into field biology?"

"No but I know a woman who is, plus I'm a better bullshitter than the others."

"You got the contract because of...."

"I have two, well one good and the other reasonable field workers."

"Who's the other one?"

"You are."

"What?" I stopped in my tracks.

"So who is the lead one?"

"She isn't now, she went to the States, but she was when I put in the bid."

"Oh!" I felt very dejected, I thought I was on the payroll because I was a competent field worker, surely my dormouse survey had shown that.

"Cathy, sometimes you are so gullible. You are my lead fieldworker, now dry your bloody eyes and lets go pay for this stuff."

"Sometimes you can be quite horrible, Tom agnew!"

"I'm the grumpy professor, got to keep up my appearance, so stop sniffing. Women!"

"Make that, sometimes you aren't horrible."

He looked at me and shook his head, "What's the difference?"

"Baseline state."

He rethought about what I had said. "Bitch!"

I smiled my response, even more so when he paid for the groceries.

"Simon's car has gone," I announced as we turned into the drive.

"I can see that, there's actually room to park now."

"I thought there was room before."

"For a diddy little thing like this there is, not for my Landrover."

"Maybe some people are better parkers than others."

"I think everyone is compared to the Camerons, couldn't park a flea on a dog's back."

All I could do was laugh, though sadly it was true.

Back in the house, we saw Simon's note, he'd gone to collect his sibling. I continued putting the shopping away. It suddenly struck me the drive had looked empty.

"Where is Stella's new car?" I shouted rushing out to the drive.

"Round the back," said Tom, "Do you have to shriek in my ear like that?"

"I'm sorry."

"Women!"

"Tom if you say that once more I am going to stuff you in the chicken!"

"Ho ho, fighting talk!"

"Yes. I can't help what I am anymore than you help being a grumpy old git. I know what I am, I don't need reminding."

"Only a woman would say that."

"Aaarrrrggggggggggghhhhhhhh!" I screamed and banged my head on the door, several times.

Once I had calmed down, I got on to prepare the lunch, parboiling the potatoes for roasties and preparing the chicken with my magic anointment. Then I popped the spuds in the oven, stuffed an onion inside the chicken and put that in the oven too. Then prepared the other veg, carrots, broccoli, mange tout,celery and some parsnips. I can't stand the latter, but the others seemed to like them.

Simon came back with Stella and Tom trotted out to help her in. It was near enough mid day so the chicken had another hour to do. I put the kettle on, I knew Stella would like a cuppa.

We hugged and she said she was glad to be home. Simon carried her bag.
"Hmm, something smells good."

"That'll be Cathy's chicken, she's doing Christmas dinner, the practice on Christmas day was quite good." Simon kept Stella between us so I couldn't hit him.

"Cuppa?" I asked her.

"Oh yes please." I went off to make it.

We drank our tea and by then it was time for the veg to go on and I was kept busy for the next hour cooking. Then I called Tom to carve the fowl while I put the veg in dishes on the warming tray. I'd laid the table earlier. Simon went off to get some wine and came back with two bottles of Moet & Chandos which made a loud noise when they popped.

"Here's to Christmas and to being all together," said Simon when we all had a glass of the champagne.

The dinner was okay and so was the champagne, or it was to my uncultured palate. Stella grumbled, but Simon's sharp glance shut her up. To me champagne is champagne, it's fizzy and over rated. We cleared the meal and got the dishes in the washer. Then it was present time.

I gave Stella her mirror and she was delighted. Simon loved his socks and even more the pen. Tom loved his wine, so all in all I felt quite good.

Tom gave Stella a bracelet and to me he gave a silver bangle. It was diamond cut and very pretty, I put it on my wrist immediately, the safety chain tickled my skin.

Tom gave Simon a bottle of port and Simon gave Tom a bottle of single malt whisky. They both seemed very pleased with their presents. Then Simon took Stella outside to her new car, she squealed with delight and hugged him.

When they came back in, she said, "What about Cathy, didn't you get her anything?"

"What for?"

"Christmas, you dipstick!"

"Nah, she said she didn't want anything."

"I don't believe you."

"Okay, it's in the garage, she's seen it once."

"Well I haven't," she said, "Come on Cathy, come and show me."

"It's only a complete bike workshop outfit." I said, "Worth a small fortune, many shops have worse set ups."

We put on coats and went out into the cold, I unlocked the garage door and opened it, the switching on the light saw my bike on the main stand and a second bike on the other stand.

"What the hell!" On the second, portable stand was a Specialized S Works Ruby.

"I didn't know you had two bikes," offered Stella.

"Neither did I. SIMON!"

"It came with the set," he said shrugging his shoulders.

"Don't be stupid, that's near enough four thousand quids worth of bike."

"It's the same size as the other one and we have the same pedals and everything. The chappy from the bike shop set it up for you."

"But why, the tools and things were enough." I was crying with a mixture of emotions, including frustration.

"I thought you might need another bike to ride if you have the one in pieces."

"Oh Simon, I don't know what to say." I hugged him and cried all over him.

"You'd better give it a ride tomorrow or it might be a while until you can again." Trust Tom to get to the nitty gritty, but it made us all laugh.

We went back in and Stella reached out some small packages for the boys. Tom got a ride on a steam train from London to York, he was pretty pleased with that, especially as it included a guided trip around the railway museum and a flight back. Simon had a day trip to Brands hatch and a driving lesson in a F1 car. His eyes lit up.

Then Stella gave me mine, a small envelope. I opened it and inside was a voucher for a weekend pampering at a spa, with a whole list of treatments included. "Don't worry, I'm coming too," she said and we hugged.

I suddenly remembered my father had given me an envelope before I left the hospital. I ran up to my room and fished it out of my bag. It was a cheque for a thousand pounds. This had to be the best Christmas I had ever had and with my day of judgement just three more days away, it was going to be the most eventful for some time.

########################

Feel free to carp, I mean comment.