Sneezy Calling Snow White.
by: Angharad & >^^<
part: 345

We entered the health centre at two minutes to four, and Sophie signed in. I went and sat in the waiting area, picking up a two year old National Geographic as I went.

“Will you come in with me?”

“I’m not sure if that’s appropriate, Sophie.”

“Oh please, Cathy, I won’t hear half of what he says.”

Why do people always know how to push my buttons so that I comply with their requests? This child needed a mother, I was at best a poor substitute. “See what the doctor says, if he objects, I stay out, okay?”

“He won’t.”

“We don’t know that yet, do we?”

“He’s nice.”

I put the magazine down on the chair next to me, it didn’t look like I would need it as Sophie was intent on chattering all the time. I suspect it was nerves–and it was certainly getting on mine.

About ten minutes later, she was called. She grabbed my hand so I had little chance of evading the issue, and we trooped off to the doctor’s room.

“Is it all right if my friend comes in with me?” she asked the doctor, a balding man in his forties, who’d eaten a few too many dinners.

“Sure, come on in.”

We followed him into his lair, and he positioned himself at his computer. “Hmm,” he said to himself as he clicked through several screens, “ah, here we are. Oh yes, abnormal pap test.”

Sophie squeezed my hand and I gently squeezed back to acknowledge her. “What does that mean?”

“The Pap test, oh it stands for some Greek, Papanicolaou, or something similar, he devised it,” said the doctor.

“No, the abnormal test result?” asked Sophie.

“Oh that, yes. It’s a CIN1.”

“A CI what?” gasped Sophie.

“A Cervical Intra-epithelial Neoplasia. In other words odd cells, however, they are relatively few, so it’s low risk at the moment. Because of your family history, I shall however, refer you to the gynae clinic for a colposcopy exam.”

“A what?”

“A colposcopy exam, they have a microscope thing which they use to have a peer up your cervix and see what’s happening. They may well be able to treat any abnormality there and then.”

“Oh, I see. So I don’t need to worry then?”

“No, not at all. You’re obviously at a slightly greater risk given your family history, but as long as we keep an eye on it every six or twelve months, we shall minimise that risk. You’re not getting any other symptoms, are you?”

“I don’t know, what should I be looking for?”

“Dyspareunia….”

“What’s that?” asked Sophie, and I must admit, I was curious too.

“Pain during sex?” He looked at her, and she shook her head. “Good, watch out for genital warts, they have been implicated in cervical dysplasia and cancers.”

He finished the interview and we left. Sophie gave a great sigh as we left. “Phew, that was better than I expected.”

“Good, lets get back, can I drop you off somewhere?” I asked and was able to drop her at her house–she shared with a couple of other students. As she left I said, “Don’t forget to watch out for genital warts.”

At this she pretended to grab something roughly and pull it up and look all around it. “Nah, it’s clear.” I laughed at her antics, if she handled her boyfriends like that, they’d all need hernia repairs on the second date!

I drove home, not sure if I was glad I didn’t have a cervix or not. Certainly, I wouldn’t like the extra risks it could entail, but then it also meant I couldn’t have kids and that was an even bigger pain. So by the time I got home, I was sad I didn’t have one. However, I suppose I could still get prostate problems although the ‘mones meant that was pretty minimal, and let’s face it the risk of testicular cancer was now zero. Ah, the joys of modern medicine!

I was home first and started the meal, which was in the final stages when Tom arrived. “Hello, daughter substitute,” he said winking at me.

“Hello, surrogate dad,” I responded.

“That smells good, what is it?”

“Liver and onions.”

“Oh boy, I haven’t had that for ages, I’ll go and wash.”

“Don’t take too long, it’s nearly ready.” I drained off the potatoes and veg while he was cleaning himself up and by the time he returned five minutes later, I was dishing up.

He poured himself a glass of Guinness, I settled for one of water and we dined. “So what was all that about one of your students needing some mothering?”

“Oh it worked out alright in the end.” I explained what had happened.

“Why do they always come to you? We have a student health system on campus which costs a fortune to maintain.”

“I don’t know.” I continued eating my dinner.

“You’re too soft, that’s why? They know what a pushover you are.”

“No, I think she needed a mother substitute. I was the best she could get at short notice.”

“And you’re how much older than her?”

“About four or five years, why?”

“Yeah, real maternal syndrome. You can’t mother them all, they’re supposed to be human, I mean adults when they come to us. It’s not our job to change their nappies and replace their dummies.”

“You did some of that with me,” I said quietly.

“I did not, I only supported you because you were an outstanding student and didn’t want to see your career go tits up.”

I looked down at my chest, he saw me and laughed. “Okay, I might have chosen a better expression,” he conceded.

“Do you think people ever talk, because I live here with you?”

“I don’t know nor care a jot, besides, they all know you’re engaged to Hooray Simon.”

“I’ll tell him you called him that,” I said jestingly.

“Go ahead, I’ve called him it to his face.”

“You haven’t?” I gasped.
“Look, Cathy, I fear for you as a scientist if you don’t listen properly and then ask questions.”

“What do you mean?”

“Exactly that.”

“I don’t understand.” I felt confused and I wasn’t sure if he was teasing me or being serious.

“I just told you, I called him Hooray Simon to his face. So you ask if I had, when I just told you I had.”

“I’m sorry, I was just confirming, running parallel tests.”

“Very good. I asked for that.”

“Tom, I don’t claim to be a good scientist, but I do the basics reasonably well.”

“More importantly, you’re a good person and we can train you to be a better scientist. Sadly, we don’t seem to be able to do the reverse.”

“Oh, the woes of society,” I said with mock emphasis.

“No it’s true, we can teach these so called adults, that we get , how to measure and record things in a scientific way. Sadly we can’t teach them to think for themselves, nor can we teach them how to distinguish right and wrong–all that should have been done before they came to us. We should be polishing off the rough edges, not trying to mould them, their parents should have done most of that, helped by the schools. Instead, the parents are too busy with their own issues and then prevent the teachers from controlling them enough to educate them. None of these kids have any self discipline any more, it’s all just self gratification.”

“What, like me?”

“No, you’re much better.”

“They’re contemporaries of mine, okay a few years younger, but that’s all. Remember, I took someone four years younger to the doctor today. Four years, I’m one of them, Tom. We’re not all a waste of time, so full of ourselves so as to be ignorant of anyone else.”

“I told you, you were different. You are.”

I shook my head and cleared the table, I wasn’t going to win this argument, the generation gap was just to big to leap across, for both of us.

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To the best of my knowledge all the medical information used is correct, however, if you have any medical problems, always seek advice from your doctor(or vet where appropriate), not rely on fictional representations. >^^<