Whoever's birthday was last week, and the person whose birthday is next week and the one who is having one this week, happy birthday!
:)

Hugs,
Joyce

I am having trouble keeping up with all the stories here, but for a good reason. With the stimulus checks we got from Covid 19, I have been modifying my house so I had now have full access to my house. Fact is has I am too busy to do everything I want to do. Last time I went through this I was very depressed, this is the opposite. So if you don't hear as much from me as you used to, it is for the best of reasons. I have typed this using Dragon speaking which I just got yesterday. I am trying to learn new things all the time. It keeps life interesting.

I'm feeling sort of tearful, perhaps without right? It's been years since I wanted a spanking. I thought that was over.

I was talking with my therapist and she asked me if I felt arousal when I got dressed in the morning? That brought me up short. I felt like I'd gotten poked with a stick.

that was

with a Rainbow!

yup, I think summer is over!

so last night I had the closest thing to a nightmare I've had in a while.

I was at a hospital, taking a class, and as I was making my way to the exit, one of my tormenters from high school jumped on my back as I was going up a flight of stairs.

I somehow managed to not fall down the stairs, bit I lay there, seemingly unable to fight, screaming at the guy to get off me.

I'll be okay, just a bit shook up.

After a nice day visiting with Friends!

Okay so today Sharon needed me to take her to the Brick so she could get a new mattress, and because I was kinda gimpy, I fell behind entering the store.

So when I did come in, an employee asked me what I was looking for, and I told him my ex was looking for a mattress.

So a while later, while I was gimping around the store, the same employee asked me if I had "found my husband".

I nodded, but I couldn't help thinking "So, that happened".

I dont know, but I was kinda flattered.

Look around, around - out in the city its just you and me

for those who follow my adventures!

Okay, so that's obviously a blatant lie, but still: I FEEL like I'm an awful person, which is about the same thing right?

Okay so last night's dream was a bit different. I was in a school, and apparently part of the the cleaning crew. I confirmed with a teacher where I was to clean, and when she said I should know already, I told her I'd been away for a while and wanted to have the expectations I was to meet clear.

I went into the room, and started moping, and then someone joined me, and a after a moment of confusion, I figured out she was a trainee I was supposed to supervise. The dream ended with the room clean and me with a sense of accomplishment.

Make of that what you will.

I had my annual health assessment today.

In cautious preparation I made sure to NOT wear panties or thigh high stockings.

that you get to read on Sunday!

ok so yesterday was a mixed bag. First, I finally got a project done that's been bugging me for a while - I cleaned out my closet's floor and sent the stuff I dont need to goodwill.

Unfortunately, I paid for that in the evening with what felt like a strained or pulled muscle in my stomach. Fortunately, a little lie down helped that, but then after I gone to sleep for the night I had yet another dream of confusion and frustration.

well kind of!

from the West Country!

Hi to all the people on this site, when i started writing The Girl inside the boy eight years ago i needed an Outlet for my overwelming emotians , at that stage I haden't come out to anyone about being transgendered. I have now lived as a post op Woman for seven years and have never looked back, apart from losing some famly members life has been pretty normal for me.

There are times I think I should have been born with a much lighter hair color (before anyone gets up in arms, did I say blond?) rather than the bright red I had as a child. Yes, it darkened into a nice auburn when I was a teenager, and then went boring brown as I got older.

I mean, what kind of idiot eats ghost chili potato chips, then (even after washing hands and using alcohol wipes) checks blood sugar levels, then injects insulin?

Ow ow ow!

so, my car's windshield wiper fluid distributor seems to be on the fritz, and my check engine light is on. which means bye bye more of my emergency money..

I'm pretty sure whatever is wrong happened when I accidently went over a high sidewalk, so it's nobody's fault but mine.

Sighs, I'm seriously tired of being a fuck-up, and right now I'm struggling with feeling like everybody around me would be better off without me.

Hey everyone,

So it's that day again and I'm feeling bleh. Things still aren't going great in my life and I'm in the middle of another insomnia/nightmares cycle again so I get maybe two or three solid hours a night once I finally drift off and then I wake terrified from nightmares, ptsd flashbacks, or a mix of both that are so realistic and terrifying that it takes me a good hour to shake them off and realize what reality actually is.

I'm sorry to post again so soon, but I had unfun day, as I got two different moments I could have done without. First, I discovered I have a rather odd PSTD reaction to pain in my leg. It not only sets off my anxiety, I have this terrible sensation that if I looked down at it, it would be a ruin. Then, later I had what I'm gonna refer to as a spontaneous male reaction. If you have (or had) male equipment, you know what I mean. Those always hit me a number of ways - they set off my dysphoria, they set off my PTSD, and they're bloody painful to boot.

Well, I had a rather down day today. It started with a bad dream that left me feeling like I was a pretty horrible person, and I just never really got out of the rut.

Ah, well, tomorrow is another day ...