okay so yesterday, Sharon called me, and asked if we could give her and Sam a ride to her doctor's because Sam was having some muscle strain issues. I could not go, so Mom went, and when she returned, things were very different.

Sharon was having pain in her leg, and her doctor believed it could be a blood clot, and so had her go to the nearby hospital. Once there, Mom was told she couldn't stay because of COVID, so she took Sam home and then came home herself.

Until recently Covid19 was something that was changing the lives of other people, but did not affect me personally.

of the new, full edition of On The Edge!

So yesterday was a tough day.

I was having such trouble driving while running Sharon and Sam around that Mom had to take over for me.

Mom felt my forehead and noticed I was hot and sweating, which may have something to do with it.

The only good thing is that I've fought off Mr. Nasty who wanted me to feel like a failure about the whole thing.

Ah, well.

You ever have one of those days? One of those days where you can feel things slipping through the fingers of your mind? Where you can feel the wheels just spinning apart? Yeah........

“I’m afraid, Dave. Dave, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it.” Kubrick’s HAL said it for me....... yep Dave, I can feel it and I’m afraid.

Well, after almost 3 months without much in the way of visits by my writing muse, I am FINALLY working on a new story. I'll post something when its ready to go.

On another note, I just wanted to say "thank you" to everyone who suggested a name for my octopus stuffie, and her new name is Calista Octavia Rose. If I figure out how, I'll share a picture.

That's it for now, except of course sending huggles to all who wish them.

I'm taking suggestions on what to name my newest member of my stuffie zoo - a pink octopus.

any and all suggestions will be considered, and appreciated.

Growing up intersex and transgender was tough on me. I looked, walked, and talked like a girl while growing up because of being intersex, but since I wasn't allowed to be a girl, I was beaten, urinated on, had my jacket set on fire with me in it, had my hair set on fire and kids spit on it to 'put it out', and worst of all, I was sexually assaulted by a neighbor when I was only 8.

All the way into adulthood, I was called a freak and an it, and every time I asked someone out they freaked out that something like me would even have the audacity to ask them.

I wish I knew!

So, I was editing my next story on my iPad when I glanced at my writing folder and remembered “Sitting Pretty” was done. I did a fast proof read (too fast, as it turns out, as there are one or two rough patches), and turned it into an experiment on more rapid posting from an iPad. I don’t think it went too badly. Again, if my notes are to be believed, I wrote it sometime before December of 2013, when I was just a lurker here, before I made my account.

how badly am I missing getting physical hugs?

Today I bought a toy octopus plushie.

I'm pretty sure that's on the list of COVID cabin fever symptoms.

so its a late post - again!

Speaking and writing in English can be like opening a can of worms. In recent correspondence I’ve been asked (albeit politely) whether I meant ‘a flu shot’ rather than ‘a flu jab’, ‘careening (a word I’d never come across) rather than ‘careering’ and whether ‘whilst’ (as opposed to ‘while’) is common in British English (yes it is - although its use is gradually declining). These are all matters of usage which changes over time and place and is to be celebrated so long as it does not impede communication. None is more ‘correct’ than the other.

I've had new contact with my estranged Son, something I had given up on. He first emailed me, saying he was thinking of me, and tried to talk about my living in sexual sin. Sorry to drop the Religion Bomb on you, but I shared Matt 19:12 and Isaiah 56:4-5 with him, and later I got an email from him asking for my forgiveness.
He can't speak a sentence without using Scripture or mentioning God.

I'm very thankful but I do not plan on a deep relationship.

Gwen

Yep, the first new Gaby of 2021 is now available!

so to tell this story, I have to set the scene.

when I go to bed, I have a light soft fleece blanket and on top of that a weighted blanket.

So got that image: me, soft fleece, heavy weight.

So this morning, I woke up to discover I had somehow switched the two blankets, and now the weighted one was under the fleece one.

I have no idea how I did this . . .

Okay, so yesterday, after I has an exhausting day running Sharon and Sam around, my mom offered to make supper for me.

And while coming back to the kitchen while carrying a heavy pot with a heavy lid on it, the lid fell off and hit her on the top of her foot.

the top of the joint of her big toe was pretty swollen, couldn't put any weight on the foot, and I started struggling with guilt.

And then the day got worse.

I managed to trip and slammed into the carpet just about as hard as I could

So at this point I was sore, guilty, and worried about mom.

So yesterday, my mom got a new set of dentures, hopefully allowing her to eat more. She also got a pair of hearing aids, which also will help.

Will this mean we get a reprieve, and have her around a bit longer?

I guess time will tell.

its not been a bad week so far.

Because I am A: a nerd, and B: a bit strange, I sometimes picture my body as a starship, and every morning Captain Brain gets into the command chair and gets the status updates for the day.

Well, to extend the metaphor a bit, you ever see an episode of any of the Star Trek shows where the ship starts having a bunch of malfunctions and nobody knows why?

Yeah, that's pretty much me right now. as my balance is off, my PTSD is on red alert, various parts of my body are complaining of pain, and I'm just generally getting all kinds of error messages that I can't track down.

so far!

2 years ago, I had a benign tumor removed from my brain. The surgery went well, and the incision site has healed pretty well, although it still hurts at times. The tumor was squeezing my cerebrum on the left side of my head, causing what, for all intents and purposes, were short circuits in my brain. At times, my memory would completely disappear for several minutes. The partial brain seizures were frightening, and when I told people about them, even my doctor, I received the advice, just get your blood sugar under control.

I finally deleted Kylie from my hangouts contact list and all the emails we have exchanged.

Pardon me if I'm less than cheerful for a while.

has passed, but we're still eating leftovers!