A Mississippi River Romance Healing Happens by Andrea Lena DiMaggio   You might as well have been tied down… tied down to a rail road track You might as well have been pushed off Niagara Falls in a paper sack You might as well have been locked out pushed down or held back You might as well have been subjected to something that you could not hack

Previously…

“Daddy’s dead.” The boy’s face changed from fear to shock to relief in a moment, only to be replaced by sadness. Vinnie put his head back on his pillow and began to sob. Danny didn’t want to tell him the next part, but he’d find out somehow by the end of the day. He stood up and grabbed Vinnie’s hand and patted it.

“My fault…it’s my fault.” Danny couldn’t take it anymore. As much as he cried all that day, he was the strongest member of the Pearsons, but he couldn’t sustain it any longer. He sat down; nearly falling into the chair again as he began to weep. He grabbed Vinnie’s hand and squeezed as the two wept as one; fearful that things would never be the same. They were right enough, but they would find out that different in this case was not only acceptable; it was just the thing the family needed.

“Mr. Pearson?” Natalia La Rue, the night nurse, called from the nurse’s station as Danny walked on the ward.

“Yes?” He shuddered as he noticed the urgent and disturbed look on the nurse’s face.

“We had a problem last night with your brother.” She said, touching his arm. He turned quickly to face Vinnie’s room and she grabbed his wrist. “He…started having memories…” She looked over at the room before continuing.

“He’s okay...Dr. Jacobs ordered a sedative and the neuropsych doc and he are going to be dropping by about nine or so." Danny started to step away and she gripped his arm, but her tone was soft; almost soothing as she spoke.

“Vinnie told me a bit about what happened to him…and you and your brother. I’m sorry to have found that out for the sake of your privacy, but I know what you and your brothers are going through…you know?” She glanced down at herself quickly in indication before continuing.

“Last night he started calling out in his sleep; very agitated. When I got to the room he was lying flat on his back asleep, eyes closed with his hands outstretched as if he was trying to fight off something.” She bit her lip as Danny winced.

“There’s more….he kept yelling ‘Daddy…Daddy.’”

“You know that my father was murdered…my brother is the chief…the only suspect at this point.”

“Yes…but that’s what I want to talk to you about.” She kept looking over at the room. She pulled Danny sideways so they were still a distance from Vinnie’s room, but could look into it from the side hallway by the family area; almost as if she was keeping a vigil or even more so, being a sentinel.

“He stopped for a few seconds and began to cry…then he said…’” she stifled a sob.

“’Daddy…he’s hurting me!’”

“Yes…I know…my father…you just said that.”

“No…not my Daddy is hurting me!” She shook her head in frustration. Danny looked once again into Vinnie’s room. Natalia shook his arm and said finally,

“NO…not ‘my Daddy is hurting me’ but Daddy….HE’s hurting me!’”

“What?” Danny knew what she was trying to say, but his words begged for her to be wrong,

“He was crying….over and over…I’m sorry, but it wasn’t just your father.” She led Danny to the family room to sit down, but kept an eye on the room.

“He was awake by then, and started crying to the point of hysterics. After he got the sedative, he calmed down. Dr. Jacobs felt…” She sighed and nodded.

“Dr. Jacobs felt a strong enough sedative to keep him calm and sleeping through the night was necessary. We tried to reach you, but your cell didn’t receive any messages.” Danny quickly pulled out his cell phone and noticed he’d run out of minutes.

“I’m sorry…I just lost track of everything.” He shook his head before looking through the glass back at Vinnie’s room. At that moment he saw a tall man dressed in scrubs enter the room.

“Isn’t Dr. Jacobs coming later?” Danny said as he stood; the hair on his neck started to rise.

“Why yes, he’s taking a break since it’s his long shift.”

“Son of a bitch…” Danny brushed past her as gently but quickly as possible. As he approached the room he heard Vinnie screaming. Picking up the pace, he sprinted to the door, finding the man standing over the bed with something in his hand.

“Hey, what the fuck are you doing?” He yelled as he halved the distance between him and the man in a single stride. The man turned and a look of panic crossed his face. He had a syringe in his hand, which he quickly dropped as he tried to push past Danny. He had at least seven inches in height on Danny, but his adrenaline hadn’t kicked in and Danny’s had. A second later Danny was on top of him, hitting him in the face with his fists.

“Mr. Pearson…Mr. Pearson…Danny!” He heard someone calling from behind as if out of a fog. A moment later two large hands pulled him gently off the unconscious figure on the floor.

“We’ll take it from here,” the Security Officer said as he and another officer picked the man off the floor and bound the man’s wrists with zip-ties. Natalia stood behind the man, breathing heavy and crying. The day nurse stood next to her holding her and talking softly in her ear. Danny stepped back and saw Vinnie lying sideways on the bed, throwing. He rushed over.

“Vin…Vinnie?” Danny shouted as his brother turned over, his face white and crusted with vomit. He looked up and saw Danny and began to sob. Danny strode quickly to the bed and pulled Vinnie up into a hug. The boy was limp and sobbing softly,

“Why, Daddy…why.” Danny looked at his brother’s face and finally lost it; every bit of hurt and anger and sadness and pain came flooding back to him and he began weeping alongside Vinnie in a horrific duet of shame and hurt.

The day nurse motioned for yet another nurse and mouthed, “Call Dr. Jacobs…” while she handed Natalia over to her. She then walked over to Danny and Vinnie, putting her hand on Danny’s shoulder.

“Mr. Pearson…why don’t you sit down next to the bed, okay?” She lowered the safety rail and Danny leaned over onto the bed and wept harder than he had ever as the nurse just shook her head and blinked out her own tears.

But you’ve been rescued, rescued from the dark of the night
You’ve been rescued, taking heed of the light
It ain't no accident when you repent
You get rescued!

St. Louis County Jail…that evening…

“Are you okay?” It was Rick’s turn to be concerned, and he was; likely the result of the wake-up call he had received from his conscience.

“I’m…I’m alright…not great…but alright.” Danny said, blinking back the remainder of the tears he cried on the way to the jail. Things would get better over time, but all three brothers and their mother would be dealing with the horror that had visited the family.

“How’s Vinnie holding up?” Rick actually decided in mid-sentence to say ‘Vinnie’ instead of ‘little brother,’ wanting to be serious and caring. Something so small and really unnecessary for anyone else was a huge step for Rick who was becoming more human moment by moment.

“The doctors are encouraged. They think my being there when he was attacked will help him feel safer, but it’s so…I mean what did he ever do to deserve this?” Danny put his head down and began to weep. Rick tapped on the glass, earning the glare of the correction officer by the door. He pointed to Danny’s downcast figure and the guard nodded.

“Danny…it’s not just him…or me….look at what he did to you…The bastard drove you to leave…we had it easy.” Rick shook his head and bit his lip. If merely meant merely getting molested, then he was right, since Danny took more beatings than the other brothers combined from where Rick sat.

“You would have never enlisted. Fuck…you were going to go to fucking college….” Rick looked down thru the plexiglass partition at Danny’s leg; the prosthesis covered by some jeans.

“I’m such a fucking waste of flesh…at least you were there to save him.” Rick began to cry. Too much guilt and shame shared by too few siblings over acts committed upon them by someone who was supposed to take care of them…treasure them. Danny looked up and sighed.

You might as well have been hanging
upside down from the treetop of a broken branch
You might as well have been chased down
a mountain by an avalanche
You might as well have been turned off
stepped on or held back
You might as well have been shipwrecked
shot down by a surprise attack

“No…Rick, please. We all need forgiveness and we all need to love each other…and Mom…now more than ever, okay? I love you, and we’ll get you out of here…I swear it.” Danny looked away, trying to gain some composure.

“Oh for Christsakes, Danny…my lawyer called. The fucker confessed. The fucker caved after he got caught…couldn’t argue with a fucking syringe with potassium chloride and his fucking prints. He and …I’m not going to say it…I’m sorry.” Rick’s eyes began to tear once again; his own memories of betrayal and hurt reaching into his heart.

“Rick…I…It’s okay…he’s fucking dead and gone…he can’t hurt us anymore!”

The guy and…they hurt Vinnie…and two other kids in their neighborhood. The bastard owed the fucker money and he got popped for it…they matched the prints on the magazine to the guy…I’m getting’ outta here as soon as they process the papers.” Rick stopped and started to shake and weep.

“Danny….if he hadn’t killed Daddy…I fucking would have…I would have killed him if I had to do it with my bare hands…I’m so sorry….I’m so sorry.” Rick put his head against the glass and began to sob.

“Ricky…please…I woulda been there right next to you….I hated him…not for what he did to me…fuck…after Afghanistan? You lose a body part and things get clearer. I hated him for what he did to Mommy and you and Vinnie…especially Vinnie…” Danny thought about Vinnie’s talks with him and the whole issue of gender. Did he have a baby brother or a baby sister? He thought better of it; Vinnie needed to sort that out, and if Rick was to know anything, it would have to be from Vinnie, not him.

“I am so sorry, Danny…please forgive me…I couldn’t bear it if you hated me still.”

“Ricky…no…don’t I don’t hate you…I love you…You’re my brother, okay?” Danny put his palm against the glass and Rick did the same; almost but not quite touching, which ironically paralleled their real life.

“Hey, Pearson…get your hand off the glass…we hate to have to clean it.” Rick shuddered at the remark by the Correction Officer until he turned to see the man pointing at the door where his lawyer stood with a paper held above his head; smiling a very toothy and satisfied smile.

But you’ve been rescued, rescued
From the dark of the night
You’ve been rescued, rescued
From the dark of the night
It ain’t no accident when you repent
You get Rescued!

Next: Life Takes a Turn for the Nurse!

Rescued
Words and Music by
Marty McCall
As Performed by
Fireworks
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gXqnuhuIiY