A Mississippi River Romance That's Okay; We're All Girls Here! by Andrea Lena DiMaggio   I'm strong But I break I'm stubborn And I make plenty of mistakes Yeah I'm hard And life with me is never easy

Previously…at the Rubio home…Sunday afternoon…

“That certainly was a lovely meal, Mr. Rubio.” Giada said.

“Yeah,” Jerry said,” but for who?”

At the Magliano home…early Sunday evening…

“We’re going over to the Pearson’s to welcome Vinnie home. You ready to go?” Miri walked through Jerry’s open door to find ‘him’ sitting on the bed, undoing in just a few moment what Vi’s and Cindy’s work had done in several hours. Between the two of them, the Rubio sisters had worked magic that afternoon, and both twins looked like models; not the super models you see on cable or in catalogs, but the pretty ordinary girls you might see in a Kohl’s or T.J. Maxx flyer. But no longer.

“Jerry…what the fuck.” Her eyes widened in surprise, which quickly turned angry as her brother sat on the bed, an awkward doppelganger to her newly acquired sister. What little growth had taken place over the past several weeks was lost as Jerry had done a quick number on his head with the clippers, leaving him looking somewhat punk but very sad.

“I’m…I’m sorry…Mir…“ He threw himself backward onto his pillow and stared at the ceiling.

“Why, Jer….?” Miri ran to the bed and sat down. Her anger had quickly faded, only to be replaced by a sad frown.

“He…Mir…I’m so confused.”

“Whaddaya mean?”

“Vin…I don’t know how I feel because I don’t know what I feel?” He turned away, looking at a long abandoned baseball glove hanging off his clothes peg on the closet.

“I don’t understand.”

“He’s…too much like me. He may be a boy, but he…Oh, shit…” He put his arm over his eyes and began to cry.

“Jer…what do you mean? I don’t understand.”

“If he’s a girl…what does that make me?” He looked at her and she understood, even If she didn’t agree.

Someday
When we're at the same place
When we're on the same road
When it's OK to hold my hand
Without feeling lost
Without all the excuses

“So…you can’t be a girl if he is?” She sighed. She wasn’t so much angry as frustrated. “Jerry…” She began, but shook her head. She grabbed his hand in both of hers and rubbed them gently.

“You and I have been closer lately than any other time in our lives…I have never seen you so happy and so ...relaxed…like you’re figuring out who you are. You get that right, and it doesn’t matter if Vinnie’s a girl or a boy or a Cylon….You’ll fit the way you’re supposed to. Come on.”

“I can’t…it hurts too much…Mir…it’s like when my shoes didn’t fit in second grade. You know?”

“Yeah…things were changing too fast for your clothes to catch up. Is that what’s happenin’?”

“Not my body….my heart is changing, Mir and it hurts…maybe even more than when Daddy was hittin’ mommy….you know…this hurts more because I feel like I have to be something for everybody. It was nice that you did that today…you and the girls…but I don’t even know who I am. You’re asking me what mascara I like and I don’t even know if I’m supposed to wear mascara.”

‘Jerry…stop…you should be wearin’ mascara, but it’s not about makeup…it’s not about who you like or don’t. It’s about who you are. And you know you’re a girl. You do, right?” Miri was almost pleading, not for Jerry to make a decision, but to feel okay about the one she had already made; feeling okay about who she was no matter what anyone else felt. Miri had never felt closer to Jerry and yet she had never felt this helpless either.

“I…I hate me.” He put his hand over his face and sobbed.

“NO…no…..no.” Miri lay down next to Jerry on the bed and began to sob alongside her erstwhile sister.

“Don’t…please, Jer…please don’t...” The two clung to each other, as close as they could, just like the times when they were little and would hide in their bedroom closet when their father would get into one of his raging moods.

“How about a new name….maybe that will help.” A voice came from the doorway. Adele had returned from the hospital to get ready for the welcome home for Vinnie over at the Pearson’s. She knelt down next to the bed and began to stroke her sister’s hair. The new one. Miri looked up and smiled through her tears.

“I could have chosen Antoinette…you know? But I needed a change from the past…that name would have been all wrong because it still would have been Daddy’s name. But you…Geraldine? I don’t think so.

“What about Willa, after Willa Cather?” Miri said, citing their mother’s favorite author; “Oh, Pioneer” being her favorite book. Jerry shook her head no; being slowing brought back into membership in the Magliano sorority of four.

“I know…how about Rina, after Rina Decker…you know? Faye Kellerman’s family of detectives?” Even though all the Magliano women were big mystery fans, a mild shrug from Jerry set that choice aside as well.

“I know…how about….”

“How about Elena?” They looked up to see Giada standing in the doorway with a tray with a tea pot and cups. She smiled as her daughters nodded one by one until Jerry looked at her. She was almost apologetic as the last vestiges of her male self held on. Giada walked over and placed the tray on the desk before kneeling down next to Adele.

“I loved my sons more than life itself. I had to let Anthony go so that Adele could live. I have to let Jerome go now, honey,” she said softly as she stroked Jerry’s face. Adele put her head on Giada’s shoulder and began to cry. She put her hand on her back and squeezed her neck gently.

“It’s okay, baby…it’s okay.” Miri smiled at her mother and did the same for Jerry, who looked at her mother.

“Me…named after Aunt Elena?” The honor was too much for the girl to take in; their favorite aunt gone all too soon over in the war that spared Danny Pearson. She put her head down and began to weep, but reached over and grabbed her mother’s free hand, squeezing.”

“And now we are four,” Giada said as tears streamed down her cheeks. “And now we are four. Giada Bettina, Adele Marie, Mirella Elizabeth, and now Elena?” She waited for the newest woman of the Magliano family to speak.

“Elena Fiorella…after Nana, okay?”

“Okay”

To figure out, to love
I'm jaded but oh so lovely
All you have to do is hold me
And you'll know and you'll see just how sweet it can be
If you'll trust me, love me, let me
Maybe, maybe

“Whatddaya mean, you don’t want a party.” Rick was still Rick, and was a bit impatient with Vinnie. It was very understandable that Vinnie was reluctant to receive company so soon after returning home from the hospital. The week’s events had been exhausting to say the least, but he was really worried about a specific visitor.

“I’m not ready!” He said, looking at the front door as if the guests would be entering right then and there.

“Nonsense,” his mother said as she walked into the living room. She was doing much better with both her oldest and youngest at home once again.

“These are your friends.” She paused, remembering her tendency to dismiss her children’s feelings.’

“Vinnie…I’m sorry for ….” She began to tear up, remember as well that she had pressured him into spending time with his father.

“Mom…don’t.” Vinnie said it softly, not as a rebuke, but as permission for her to forgive herself.

“It’s okay. I…I just.”

I'm confusing as hell
I'm north and south
And I'll probably never have it all figured out
But what I know is I wasn't meant to walk this world without you
And I promise I'll try
Yeah I'm gonna try to give you every little part of me
Every single detail you missed with your eyes
Then maybe
Maybe, yeah maybe

“Mom…Vinnie and I need to go upstairs for a bit…you recall our conversation about him seeing the therapist.” Danny stood over Vinnie behind the couch and squeezed his brother’s shoulder.

“You mean….the…girl thing?” She said it with reluctance; not because she didn’t want to deal with Vinnie’s gender issues, but because it was all too new, and one more new thing to deal with in a week of new tragedy and new hurt. Maybe the last thing she needed was new confusion.

“Mommy…I’m not even sure. I just know I have to see if this is who I’m supposed to be.” He pointed to the stairwell, as if it was leading to change. She nodded, almost as if she was sending him off to camp.

“Okay.” She smiled. “Don’t be long.”

The doorbell rang; company was an hour early.

“Oh…that should be Adele. She’s coming over early to help Vinnie.” Danny walked to the door and greeted his fiancé’ with a kiss before ushering her in. She went immediately to Estelle and gave her a big hug. As she pulled away, she kissed her on the cheek.

“Thank you.” Estelle said, looking at Danny. “You’ll make him very happy…you already have.” She stepped back and noticed Rich standing at the kitchen door. He turned away; blushing a bright red. Danny smiled at her and nodded.

“Rick…it’s okay…really.” She touched his arm and he went to pull away. She grabbed his wrist and said softly,

“Ricky…it’s okay…I forgive you.” It was too much for him to handle even if it was a great thing. He smiled at her and nodded, receiving, he felt, what he never deserved. Which is probably as it should be, but never the less, he smiled at Danny before walking out the back door. Adele looked at Danny who just nodded and smiled again.

“He’ll be okay…he’s not used to being human, is all.”

“Adele?” Estelle said softly.

“Yes, Mrs. Pearson?”

“Please, call me mom or something like that?” She smiled weakly.

“Okay…Mom works for me. What can I do for you?”

“When you go upstairs to help Vinnie…you know…get ready? Can I help?” Adele hugged her future mother in law and smiled, saying.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.” She grabbed Estelle’s wrist and began walking up the stairs. Danny put his hand on the banister and she turned around and shook her head, saying,

“Girls only, silly”

I don't want to be tough
And I don't want to be proud
I don't need to be fixed and I certainly don't need to be found
I'm not lost
I need to be loved
I just need to be loved
I just want to be loved by you and I won't stop 'cause I believe
That maybe, yeah maybe
Maybe, yeah maybe

Soon after…

The doorbell rang, and Giada stepped inside, hugging Estelle as Miri and Elena walked in; the first time ever that they had worn matching outfits outside the home. Adele walked over and hugged her sisters, making sure to pay special attention to the newest member of the Magliano household. Estelle looked at Elena and smiled nervously; once again out of an unfamiliarity rather than discomfort. Adele stepped back and smiled at everyone, including Rick, who had returned after a long and ponderous but necessary walk.

“May I have your attention, please. Madames’ et’ Monsieurs….for the first time anywhere, may I say it is with extreme pleasure that I introduce to you, Miss Victoria Estelle Pearson.”

As she spoke, a pair of feet came into view on the stairs. Slowly a figure descended the staircase, revealing a girl of about fifteen. She wore a grey top over a teal pullover, with blue jeans and flats. Her hair was short and her makeup ‘chaste’ as her mother put it, but there was no mistaking it; she was a fairly pretty girl indeed. She stopped at the third step from the floor; more out of nervousness than fashion sense. Rick whistled and began to clap, causing the others to follow suit. One by one, each of them hugged her as she stepped into the living room.

“I don’t understand this at all, baby, but I want to," her mother said softly and kissed her on the cheek.

Miri practically bounced over to her and hugged her, picking her up briefly before putting her down again with a big kiss on the lips.

“You look great….” She nearly shouted, adding with a whisper, “welcome to the club.” Finally, one last figure remained in the back of the group. The two stepped closer to each other. They hadn’t seen one another since ‘the’ kiss in the hospital. Elena had begun to shake just a bit until Victoria grabbed her by the hand and led her into the kitchen alone.

“You…you look….wonderful.” It was the first time ‘Elena’ had spoken to anyone other than her family. Tori, for that is what she came to prefer, smiled and laughed softly.

“You do too…I’m so glad you could come.” Miri and Giada had done their best to repair Elena’s ‘deconstruction’ with a hasty makeup job and a wig that they had at home.

Miri stood in the kitchen doorway, unable to contain herself. She turned to Adele and grinned.

“I guess that settles gender, huh?” Adele nodded and smiled as the two girls stood facing each other, speechless.

“Mir…please!” Elena turned to her sister and shooed her away from the door. She turned to Tori, who shuddered a bit before grabbing her hand, pulling her in for a kiss, a beautiful first girlfriend kiss that was witnessed by Miri, who was leaning into the kitchen once again.

“And that settles orientation!” She laughed. The two girls stopped kissing long enough to close the kitchen door.

Estelle began to cry softly and in moment felt an arm around her shoulder. Giada smiled at her and blinked out some tears of her own before hugging yet another one of her daughter’s future mother in law. Miri went and sat on the stairs and smiled. Danny turned and kissed Adele before they all walked into the dining room. And Rick smiled and sighed before walking out the door again for another long walk.

To figure out, to love
I'm jaded but oh so lovely
All you have to do is hold me
And you'll know and you'll see just how sweet it can be
If you'll trust me, love me, let me
Maybe, maybe

Next: Even More Romance!

Maybe
Words and Music by
Kelly Clarkson
as Performed by Kelly Clarkson
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OhWUHlEfY4s