Allie - The teenage years of Alexander Horten

June 5- June 11, 2016

June 5, 2016
Sunday
Dear Diary

I told Father Immer did not want to rejoin the choir. The choir indeed meant a lot to me and I do miss it a lot. This being said, I told the priest that I was judged to be dangerous and a bad influence on the other boys. Father Immer promised once that he would help me and support me. However, when he was put under pressure he caved in and kicked me out. Being judged is one thing, but a priest was supposed to protect when there was injustice and prejudice. He did not do that. This was just as bad as the ones that judged me. Considering all this, I did not want to be part of the choir.

Granny was mad at my answer and told me that I was a wicked and corrupt child. She spent all afternoon lecturing me that she wanted me to give her the key and the clothes that Annie gave me. I told her no and went up to my room and locked it. This did not stop her from telling me how mad she was that she was we went to the Pride Parade. She thought that the LGBT movement was the devil's work. She could not understand how I could take Sarah with me

I shouted back that Sarah experienced more love and understanding there than Granny had shown the world in a lifetime.

June 6, 2016
Monday
Dear Diary

Strangely, Noah is no longer at the school. Everything is so peaceful.

Annie and I talked about how we could be boyfriend and girlfriend when we went to different schools. I know this will be hard for her. Annie had tears in her eyes thinking about it. I tried to cheer her up by saying that we could see each other during weekends and she would always be in my heart. This sounds like a good thing to say but to be honest, I was just as sad as she was.

When I was home, Granny called Sarah and me for a talk. She told me now it was time for my punishment. She ordered me to go into the cupboard under the stairs. I refused. That just made Granny have an evil smile on her face as she told me that If I did not do it, then she would be forced to punish Sarah in my place. Then she asked herself where she left her cane.

I looked at Sarah and could see that she was terrified. Once again, Granny knew that I would do anything to protect my little sister.
I crawled into the cupboard under the stairs. Granny locked it and told me that she would let me out when I agreed to hand over the key and Annies old clothes and promise never to go to Pride again. I did not answer.

It was dark in there and the air was not very good. I do admit that I was frightened. It helped that Sarah sat outside and talked nonstop to keep me company. I think that she thanked me a few thousand times for doing this for her.

June 7, 2016
Tuesday
Dear Diary

I slept in the cupboard. I tried to be brave and think that if Harry Potter could survive, then so could I. Granny told me that it was time to go to school and would I give her the key and the clothes, I shouted no back to her. I could hear an evil laugh from her as she said that I would be staying in the cupboard and would not go to school. She told me that Sarah would not be keeping me company as she was locked in her bedroom. This was just typical for Granny. She was now punishing Sarah even though she promised she would not do it.

I was hungry and very thirsty. I did not have anything to drink or eat since yesterday. I wondered how long it would take me to die. The one good thing about this is I could be a ghost and haunt Granny for the rest of her life.

The ghost of Mom appeared and told me to be brave. Then there was suddenly food and some milk in front of me. This proved that the ghost of Mom was just not my imagination or maybe I was just hallucinating that there was some food and milk. It did not matter. It tasted so good. Mom kept me company all day and finally told me that it was time to sleep.

When I woke up, there was a lot of shouting. I was very confused. I was more confused when it was Dad that opened the door and let me out. Sarah was excited and kept on saying that Dad was finally home

After the family hugs, Granny was asking Dad if he should not be in the hospital. She was also mad because Dad was interfering with her punishment. Dad told her in a stern voice, “I am their father and so do not worry, I am very well thank you. I am not the one who should be in a padded cell. You should be! I do not care how late it is. I want you to pack your bags and go. You are never to come back again. If you try to get custody of them or even try to contact them again, I will press charges against you for child abuse. Now go and pack your bags and get out of our lives!”

I told Granny that I would be a gentleman and open the door for her.

June 8, 2016
Wednesday
Dear Diary

Granny was gone. I found this so hard to believe.

Dad told me that I was not going to school today. I needed clothes if I was genderfluid. I needed boyish and girlish clothes as well as make-up. We were going shopping.

Then Dad told Sarah that she was not going to school either. It was time that she was spoiled as well. So we would go shopping for her as well.

We shopped and shopped and in the end, Dad told us that we should have a milkshake.

He explained what happened, “After your mother died, I could not deal with it. She is the love of my life. I did not know how I would raise you two alone. I fell you apart, and Granny suggested that I get some help. I thought she was trying to be nice and trying to help me. This was not true. She was just trying to keep me out of the way.

I got some help and I could see how bad of a father I have been. I was afraid to come home and leave the hospital. I was thinking only about myself and feeling sorry for myself. This was despite Billy and even Allie’s teacher visiting me and telling me that you needed me.
Then something strange happened. I had a vision of your mother. She looked like a ghost. She told me everything grandmother was doing and that I needed to man up and go home and be a father. It was good that I did!

Now I am here. It is time that we try to be a family, a family that your mother would be proud of!”

June 9, 2016
Thursday
Dear Diary

You would think that the gossip of the school today would be that Granny locked me up like Harry Potter or that Annie was my girlfriend. This was not talked about.

You will not believe this, but Noah was arrested. It was him that set fire to Andrew's house. This means that he would probably spend his teenage years in a juvie.

There is justice!

June 10, 2016
Friday
Dear Diary

Dad told us that we had to speak

“Let's start with Sarah. You are my little princess and always will be. I wish that you would not get older, but you will. I trust that you will make the right decisions. I want us to have father and daughter days, where we can have fun and have a better relationship. You must have someone that you can trust and discuss things with. I want to do this and hope you will trust me enough to be open with me.

Allie, you are genderfluid. It took me a long time to accept this. This is your choice. I will support you no matter if you are genderfluid, transgender, a boy or whatever. Your family will be your support and be a rock where you can feel safe and loved.

Both of you were told that you would be going to other schools. Sarah, you will not be going to boarding school. Allie will not be going to military school. I am sending you both to Bella’s school. Here you will get a good education that will nourish your mind and personality. I am sure that you both will be happy there.

One more thing. I want us to be together as a family. I spoke with the headmistress at your new school and she offered me a teaching job there. We will be together as a family”

After we hugged, I rushed to tell Annie and Bella that we would be at the same school!

June 11, 2016
Saturday
Dear Diary

This is the last page. There is only one thing I can write.
I am the luckiest and happiest teen in the world!

To be continued… the author writes his thoughts on the characters and answers some questions.