Good Days/Bad Days

On Good days

I look at myself and say

‘When did I get so strong?”

“How did I become so brave”

“Who is the beautiful woman I see in the mirror?”

But it doesnt last

And bad days come again

And I feel weak

And scared

And ugly

I know I cant go back to being a boy

But it seems like I have no way to become a girl

And have no guarantee it would be any better for me if I could be one

I feel stuck and trapped and have no hope

lonely and worthless

On those days

I try and remember the things I am grateful for

My friends, my job, my daughter, my God

And how far I’ve come on the journey in such a short time

And hold on

Until the good days come again.