Dorothy Colleen

Must be doing something right

Had an interesting moment at work last night. I was talking to a co-worker about the trans thing, and she told me that the first time I mentioned it, she couldn't believe it - I was far too feminine to have ever been a boy ...

Must be doing something right, no?

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good news about my foot

Well, I have some good news about my foot. My doctor had sent my information to a foot clinic, and I went there today, and the doctor there assured me that the growth isn't cancer, that its just scar tissue, and gave me a steroid shot to help start the healing process. I will need at least a couple more of these shots, one every two weeks, and hopefully, that will be the end of that.

I'm super glad.

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Saw an interesting commercial

Just saw an interesting commercial. It was regarding a drug proscribed for several mental conditions like ADD, and apparently it had the side effect of growing breasts on men. Why do I feel like this could be a story here?

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Almost lost it in church yesterday

Well, I almost lost it in church yesterday. As part of the service, they allowed people to come up to the front, light a candle, and say something they are grateful for. I went up, and thanked the church for their acceptance of me, and barely kept the tears back. Then, after the service I tried to explain what it meant to me that the church treats me like just another woman, and I almost lost it again ...

I am so blessed, yes?

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My idea cupboard is getting bare

Well, after being one of the most prolific writers on here for the last four and a half years, I am facing the real possibility that my ideas cupboard is growing close to bare. Maybe all my brainpower is wrapped in my autobiography, but its possible that outside of a few crumbs that I might be able to bring to life, my days as a writer are numbered ...

If that occurs, I want my friends to know I will continue to contribute in other ways. I will comment and encourage other authors, and I will keep my blog going with whatever is happening in my life.

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Update on my foot

Had an appointment with the doctor, and he wants to book me for surgery on my foot as soon as possible. He talked about it being a "fibroid mass", and mentioned the possibility of getting a biopsy on it once its removed to be sure its not cancer.

Now, why couldn't I get that on my male bits instead ?

Ah, well.

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Had a flashback yesterday

Well, on Sunday after church, I had another session with my pastor's wife, and had a flashback during the session. In my flashback, I saw myself during the abuse being photographed by my rapist. A flash from a camera, going off again, and again.

Needless to say, I was a little upset about this.

But thinking about it this morning, I found myself being able to say "Screw my rapist. He doesn't own me. So he took pictures. I don't belong to him."

So maybe this flashback ends up being a step forward.

I can hope so, anyway.

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Did all my fans disappear?

I guess what little fan-base I have has given up on my writing. My last story "Somebody's knockin'" and my latest poem "Lie to me" both are lacking in comments. I know I'm not the wonderful author Tels or Bailey Summers or Drea (or almost anybody you can mention on this site) are, but still ...

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Men and Flirting

I have said before that some outfits can improve a man's appearance, and last night at work I got a good example of it. One of my supervisors was wearing a western-style dress shirt that flattered him nicely, and once I finished berating myself for noticing, I decided to give myself a break on the subject.

But it did get me thinking about flirting with men, and having a man flirt with me.

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Okay, so now I am confused

Well, I had my ultrasound on my foot, and I am more confused as to what's going on than ever. I started to sweat when the technician called someone else to look at my results, and all this other person would tell me was there was a possibility it was "scar tissue" and gave a Latin name which meant nothing to me.

So now I have to wait for a MRI scan, which wont happen until May, and then see the specialist.

Our system is free, but it sure takes a long time to get anything done ...

Ah, well.

What's a life without pain?

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Scavenger

Days Since last incidentI stepped through the broken glass of the front door of my store, and flicked on a flashlight. I wasnt sure what I was looking for, but here I was, looking anyway ....

The place was a wreck, whether from looting or an outbreak, I wasn’t sure. Still, I had nothing else to do with myself but try and see what I could find here.

I had managed to sleep through the apocalypse. Now, I had to somehow stay alive until order was restored....

Dottie's Christmas dinner - A Jaci and Dottie story

Dottie’s Christmas dinner - A Jaci/Dottie Story

Young Dottie fiddled with the dress she was supposed to be putting on, trying prolong the process as long as possible.

Fragile, handle with care

I find myself wondering why I feel so fragile. Is it that in taking of the male mask I am more vulnerable than I have ever been? Is it that I am now on hormones that equal what a teenage girl deals with? Is it that trying to deal with both my gender issues and my abuse I dont have a lot of emotional strength left for anything else?

I don't know, but the truth remains - I am more sensitive, more fragile now.

So be extra careful in handing me, okay?

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