Fearfully and Wonderfully Made Chapter 10 - “I will love thee better still”

One of my uncles decided that maybe he could give me a break, and hired me to work at the parkade of the international airport as a maintenance person, which I gratefully accepted, when I had a chance encounter that would change my life.

Because I could come in during breaks, I spent some time with the cashiers, and then one of them upon hearing me complain about being lonely said she knew of someone who might be perfect for me, if I wanted to go out on a blind date and find out.

So I went to a restaurant in a local mall, wondering what the heck I was getting myself in for.

Shelia found me, and we had a nice dinner, and then I walked her back to where she was staying. As we walked, we sang “amazing grace” together, and I walked home filled with hope that I had at last found what I was looking for.

At the same time I started dating her, I sought out a pastor to talk to about my gender issues, and he recommended that I marry. He said I could then give my femininity to my wife, and all my problems in that area would be solved.

So six months after our first date, i asked her to marry me.

It was an amazing ceremony. An uncle covered some of the costs, and my brother wrote and performed a song as a wedding march. So instead of the traditional “here comes the bride”, Sheila came down the aisle to the sound of my brother on guitar and singing “I will love thee better still”.

It felt like a fairytale brought to life.

Sadly, the fairytale didn’t even survive the honeymoon. I tried to tell my new bride about my gender struggles, but all I accomplished was make our honeymoon awkward. Then once we came home, she quickly kicked me out of the master bedroom, saying that my nightmares, snoring, and general movement when I slept all made me not someone she could sleep beside.

As if to emphasize our lack of intimacy, a couple of weeks into our marriage I had a cold, and she kicked me out of the house, telling me to stay at my mother’s until I was recovered.

Despite this inauspicious start, I sincerely wanted to make this work, so when she asked me to consummate our marriage, I tried my best.

Not long after, Shelia had two things to tell me. The first was that she was pregnant. The second was that she was in the country illegally. We would end up spending most of the next decade, not to mention thousands of dollars, to try and solve the second problem. As for the first situation, well, I think that deserves a new chapter ...

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