(aka Bike, est. 2007) Part 2153 by Angharad Copyright © 2013 Angharad
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I was elated that Danni had shown up safe and sound, I was angry that PC goody two shoes, thought I was abusing a child by allowing her space to explore her gender and sexuality. Part of me wondered if she’d experienced the sort of assault that Danny had survived, whether she might see things differently.
I grabbed my bag and car keys and by the end of the drive discovered that Stella had practically emptied the tank of fuel. I’ll murder her–slowly. That required a detour to a garage or supermarket to fill up–the car had been practically full of fuel when I left home.
That took an extra ten minutes, so by the time I arrived at Cindy’s house, Danni was getting very worked up. “I thought you weren’t coming,” she said wringing her hands.
“I had to do one or two things before coming, I’m sorry.”
“You coulda let me know.”
“You haven’t been answering your mobile–how could I?”
“It’s broke. I dropped it when I was running down a flight of stairs, it slipped over the edge and it doesn’t work now.”
“Okay, we’ll send it off and see if they can repair it, I think we have some insurance on it, somewhere.”
“Did you recognise the boys who chased you?”
“Not really, they were a couple of years older, but I’ve seen ’em round school.”
“How did they recognise you?”
“I was lookin’ at some makeup in John Lewis an’ they had a free raffle if you bought anythin’. The girl asked me my name an’ I gave it as Danielle Maiden, and one of the boys was standing behind me an’ recognised my name from the football team–I was top scorer last year. I suddenly realised they was gonna grab me and ran off. They chased me round the shops an’ I nipped into the ladies loo–well the disabled. They followed a couple of minutes later and I held myself off the ground by grabbing onto the coat hook behind the door. The pushed it open, didn’t see me and left. I waited for two hours before I dared go out. My phone was bust, so I couldn’t let anyone know where I was–sorry.”
“That’s twice you’ve been chased in John Lewis–might be better if you stay away from there in future if you’re in girl mode.”
Brenda brought us all a cup of tea. I sipped it and felt my blood pressure falling, then I thought about the woman PC and it raised again.
“You’re very quiet,” said Brenda to me.
“I’d called the police and had two coppers in my sitting room, the one I knew quite well and had asked him to come and see me. He, unfortunately, brought a woman PC with him who took a dim view of letting my child run the streets of Portsmouth in skirts. She likened it to child abuse.”
Brenda spat tea all over the carpet, “She did what?”
“She thought I was pervert and should be investigated.”
“Has she never dealt with anyone transgender before?”
“Certainly not a child.”
“You said there were two of them came?”
“Yes the other one had no problem with Danni’s dress sense other than wanting a description to circulate if it became a real missing child case–thankfully it didn’t.”
To my surprise, Danni came and sat on my lap and rested her head on my shoulder. She felt heavier than I thought she was. “I’m sorry, Mummy,” she said and burst into tears.
“Sorry for what?”
“Causing you trouble–I’m always causing you trouble.”
“No you aren’t, sweetheart.” I held her while she sobbed on my shoulder. Brenda looked quite concerned.
“Perhaps I should go and see this woman and explain what it feels like to be transgender,” offered Cindy.
“That’s a very generous and courageous offer, Cindy, and we both appreciate it, but I think you’d be wasting your time.”
“It’s worth a try though, innit?” she bounced back at me.
“She’d suggest I put you up to it.”
“But I’d tell her it was my own idea.”
“She wouldn’t believe you.”
“I’d make her.”
“How you gonna do that, Cindy girl?” asked Brenda.
“I’ll go and tell her like it is...”
“So then she’ll accuse me of abusing you, will she?” asked her mother.
“How can she do that? You’re my mum.”
“That don’t count, Cind.”
“But that’s stupid,” she protested.
“It might be stupid, but it’s also true that most sexual abuse happens by adults known to the child, usually family or close friends of the family,” I explained.
“But they’re the ones who should be protecting their kids,” she said loudly.
“I agree entirely, but it’s a fact, I’m afraid.”
“That’s dreadful.”
“Much of what humans do is, so it’s understandable that we have police who are suspicious of even innocent motives or actions.”
“But you haven’t abused Danielle.”
“To some extent it would depend upon what you mean by abuse.”
“I mean, hittin’ ’em or doing sex with ’em.”
“Abuse can mean physical, mental, sexual or emotional and probably more than that. Constantly bullying a child, shouting at them, hitting them, doing depraved things or just not doing your job as a parent, all of these are abuse.”
“Mum shouts at me all the time,” said Cindy.
“Only because you have your music on so loud you can’t hear me speak.”
“It’s still shoutin’ at me–an’ that’s abuse, innit, Dr Watts?”
“I don’t think so, it’s usually shouting unkind things or threats, they consider abuse.”
“Oh.” She sat back down and rethought the ideas we’d discussed.
“You’ve never abused me,” announced Danni. “Sometimes I abused your trust.”
“That’s different, sweetheart.”
“No it isn’t.”
“What you do is irrelevant to the police, what I do is a matter of concern.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m an adult and you’re not.”
“Perhaps you’d be safer in boy’s clothes?” suggested Brenda.
“No I wouldn’t, they’d still recognise me and I couldn’t have run into the ladies.”
“So what are we going to do in the long term?” I posited.
“I dunno, Mummy, I really don’t.” She began wetting my shoulder again with her tears.
“We can’t go on like this, can we?”
“I dunno,” she sobbed on my shoulder.
“What do you want to do, Danielle?” asked Brenda, “Give your mum some help here.”
“I dunno,” she replied.
“Anyway, I think we’d best be getting home before they add me to the missing person’s list.”
“That police woman, she needs to know what we’re about,” said Cindy.
“Don’t you go tryin’ to teach her,” said Brenda firmly.
“We’ll see,” said Cindy.
“Oh no we won’t,” Brenda said loudly and firmly, “because if I get wind that you’ve been trying to change their minds, you won’t sit down for a week.”
“That’s abuse, Mummy,” squeaked Cindy.
“No it isn’t, it’s retribution.”
On the way home I told Danni that I was going to have her home schooled.”
“Okay.”
“No disputing it?”
“No.”
“Not even a little?”
“No.”
“Okay, I’ll set it up for next week if the tutor is available.”
“Mummy, can I stay as a girl for a bit longer?”
“I told you, you could as long as you wanted, but you have to realise there are consequences to everything.”
Comments
Full time transvestite.
There's a lorra' them abaaht! If I had the choice I'd probably explore that option but I've got obligations to somebody who saved my life a good few years ago, namely my wife. She still want's her husband and the need to go full time is not overwhelming for me. That's the conundrum intergendered people are confronted with.
I suspect Danni might become a full-time transvestite though if she is, puberty is going to need some medical input hormonally speaking.
This particular facet interests me deeply, thanks Ang.
Bev.
Hugs.
Despite...
Despite everything, kids tend to think actions don't have consequences... There are times I wonder if learning that is one of the signs that a kid is growing up... And explains why some kids never grow up.
A tangled web you weave... I look forward to seeing how things work out.
Thank you,
Annete
Everytime Danni
appears to be edging closer to returning to her birth sex, Event seem to conspire to change her mind...
Or at last thats what it seems like..
Could it be though she is enjoying dressing and behaving like a girl and is loath to admit to anyone (including herself) just how much she enjoys it...
It does seem though judging by the last line of the part , That Cathy is going to lay things on the line to her new daughter a little more forcefully ... Going to be interesting to find out just what Danni will do...
Kirri