The Daily Dormouse. (aka Bike, est. 2007) Part 2112 by Angharad Copyright © 2013 Angharad All Rights Reserved.

The next few days were a total blur as I helped them pack for Stanebury and also get myself ready for the conference. Finally, I saw them off, Simon had arranged for the use of a people carrier–a Mercedes–well Jaguar don’t make one, and somehow we managed to pack them and their luggage in it. I was going to follow on three days later and bring Lizzie up with me.

Don’t ask me how, but I’d been able with some help from Stella to get suitable dresses for Danni, Pia and Cindy as well as one for Phoebe, and of course dresses for Meems, Trish and Livvie. It was going to seem strange being without the children and they were going to let me know when they got there. I was anxious that Simon was all on his own but Phoebe reassured me that she’s help him cope with the younger ones.

They all promised me that they’d behave themselves and Daddy and I waved them off before we set off for the University to start the conference which commenced after lunch.

Essentially, the Dean opened the conference and welcomed the delegates, Tom ran the first session and then it was my turn to introduce the mammal survey, how we’d set it up, the strengths and weaknesses of it and how it had been adopted by the European Union for basis of a Continental wide survey.

I read off loads of acknowledgements of British universities and how they’d helped by leading on certain groups or families of mammals, badgers, deer, and so on. I suggested that it had only worked because of its comprehensive nature and because so many people had worked so hard to complete it.

I asked everyone present who’d been involved to stand and then asked the rest of the delegates to applaud their efforts, offering my own thanks at the beginning of the lecture.

I felt I’d talked too long, tried to punctuate it with some humour, especially of the erroneous and occasionally mischievous record, which was picked up and passed on to me for inclusion or rejection. The one which stood out was the record of a hippopotamus submitted by a vicar from Pewsey. When the original had been challenged by the University of Bath, (that got a laugh, hippos in the Bath) they explained to our wicked cleric that the survey applied to wild animals only, he stated that he didn’t think it was wild exactly, just a tad miffed.

Professor Esmond Herbert presented the second paper on the contribution of Sussex University and their mammal records centre. I wished I’d been absent for his paper.

“Professor Agnew, fellow delegates before I mention what we at Sussex did to assist in this massive undertaking, I have to declare that one of our alumnae is and has been the driving force of this whole project, from persuading the government and European Union to fund it, to cajoling and threatening everyone here into helping her.

“I refer of course to Dr Cathy Watts, or Lady Catherine Cameron depending upon your social status. She has been immense in pulling everything together, aided and abetted by her professor and his secretary, Pippa. Considering she has a huge family of seven or eight adopted children, quite how she’s managed to organise the survey and this conference is mind blowing, plus make a brilliant documentary film on dormice–it’s all too much for a mere mortal like me. So ladies and gentlemen, I’d like you to put your hands together and show your appreciation for Dr Cathy Watts, aka Lady Cameron, but in reality, Superwoman.”

I nearly died of embarrassment especially as they made me go up on stage and presented me with a huge bunch of flowers, then they presented Pippa with one and finally Tom–he got a bottle of single malt.

There was a meal in the refectory which was informal, the one the next day was the formal one and would include all sorts of boring speeches, but everyone has to have their say. It would start with the Mayor of Portsmouth, then the Chancellor of the University, then the Dean, then Tom–then we could go home. The third day was morning only to enable the delegates to travel early after lunch.

The second day was quite interesting as three British universities gave their take on the experience of running part of the survey. To be fair they spoke well of Portsmouth in assisting in their queries where they had any, and complimented the Pompey team for our promptness in replying. The team, Tom, Pippa, Spike and yours truly. Tom dealt with government, Pippa with admin enquiries, Spike with enquiries from hazel nuts or other dormice and I dealt with the rest. I must have been mad–well still am–the sheer volume I got through astonished me now, so what it did then I have no idea. I suppose I was so close to the trees I couldn’t see the size of the forest or I’d have run away–nah, got a chainsaw and cut it down to size.

I wore a rather nice cocktail dress to the formal dinner–too stuffy to wear long, although plenty did. Thankfully there wasn’t any dancing so I didn’t have to crush any toes. There was plenty of talking in the bar after the dinner was over and Tom was a bit unsteady on his feet when I drove him home at midnight.

Day three included two lectures. The day before we’d had a French and Spanish perspective and on the third day, we had a German one and finally, thoughts for attempting a similar survey in the United States, from a Professor Calvin Hobbs, who was professor of Mammalian Biology at Harvard University and who had been asked by the US state department to cost a similar survey over there.

When he heard the cost of the British effort he said he nearly collapsed, as his draft estimate was ten times bigger, though he admitted he did have a bigger patch to survey.

Tom summed up the conference and brought it to a close. An hour later, I was loading my car and not forgetting Cate and Lizzie, I set off for Stanebury and a long drive.

It would have been lovely to suggest that I’d put my foot down and hammered up the motorway and got there a few hours later. It would have been a fantasy. I stopped every two hours, stretched my legs and had a wee and coffee. The two little ones also had refreshments and use of facilities. We arrived at the castle in the dark at half past ten, I was twitchy with caffeine overdose through all the coffee and the twa wains were fast asleep.

Simon helped me carry them indoors and put them to bed. Then I had a stiff drink myself to try and calm me down a little–I was still hyper from the drive. The ball had apparently gone down well and all of the Cameron girls had conducted themselves with dignity. Phoebe showed me some photos on her laptop and it looked as if they’d all had a good time, even Danielle seemed to enjoy the dancing, dancing with boys as well as with Cindy.

Simon was tired and went off to bed while I took a stroll outside for some fresh air accompanied by Phoebe. I admitted to her that Danni puzzled me and she agreed that it seemed out of character wondering how much influence Pia and Cindy were exerting on her erstwhile brother. I also considered the effects of the assault on both boys and posited the question, were they trying to escape their own masculinity because they despised those who’d attacked them so much? Phoebe just shrugged and said she had no idea–which made two of us.