The Daily Dormouse. (aka Bike, est. 2007) Part 2110 by Angharad Copyright © 2013 Angharad All Rights Reserved.

Upon arrival at the house, Danielle awoke spontaneously, presumably because the car stopped. “C’mon sleeping beauty Prince Charming awaits us.”

“Wha...?”

“Get your little bum vertical and help me carry your purchases into the house.”

“We home?”

“No, I thought I’d make you walk from Gosport.”

“Oh.” She yawned, looked around and realised we were home yawned again just as Trish yanked open the door.

“C’mon, lessee what you bought then.”

“Trish, it’s customary to allow people to convey their purchases into their domicile before investigating their tastes.”

“What?” her eyes nearly popped out.

“Wait until we get indoors before you start poking about in Danni’s shopping.”

“Oh all right, but ’urry up, I wanna see what she got.”

I got out of the car and opened the boot from which I handed Trish a bag. “This is yours, that one’s for Livvie and this one for Meems.” She took the three bags and dashed into the house.

“What did I get?” asked Stella leaning against a doorway.

“Same as I got.”

“That bad, eh?”

“Yep, however, your two will like these,” I gave her a bag with two doll’s outfits, and when Cate arrived to share in the spoils, I handed her a small bag. She went off giggling and laughing.

“What did you give her, I want one,” complained Stella.

“A pair of socks.”

“And they had that effect on her–are they Simon’s dirty ones, or something?”

“No, they’re musical socks.”

“Right, now I’ve heard everything.” With that Cate came back wearing the garments and her feet squeaked and tooted as she walked.

“You have now,” I replied to Stella, who laughed loudly.

“I bought Lizzie a little dress, some panties and tights.” I showed the items to Stella.

“Oh they’re lovely,” she said taking them out of the bag and examining them. “What did you get then, Danni girl?” she asked our most recent convert to the feminist cause.

“One or two things, you know,” and with that she struggled out of the door under a mass of bags and shoe boxes.

“One or two dozen by the look of things.”

“Whatever,” was fired back from the disappearing consumer.

“Charming,” said Stella looking at me and shaking her head.

“Wait till the others demand a modelling session.”

“Oh dear, does our newest girly not like strutting her stuff then?”

“I think she might be feeling a tad tired.”

“What? Girls are born to shop–we’re programmed in the womb–and having seen you in action, no one could doubt your sex.”

“I have been known to enter the odd emporium.” I blushed at her back handed compliment.

“It’s only odd if you don’t part with cash. I’ve been out with you, remember.”

“You could spend for England, too,” I retaliated.

“Good job we’re Scots then, innit?”

“Mummy, Danni won’t show us her new clothes.”

“That is her prerogative.”

“No it isn’t, it’s ours to say if we like something or not.” This child is either going to be a politician or a barrister.

“Tell her I asked her to let you see her purchases.”

“Did she choose them all then?”

“We did it between us.”

“Oh, perhaps I’ll go out an’ play then.” With that dismissal she walked away leaving Stella almost choking on laughter.

“You asked for that, girl,” offered my sister in law when she could breathe again.

“Make us a cuppa will you, I’d better have a look at Lizzie.” I pushed past Stella with a few bags still in my hands, they were for Jacquie, Julie, Phoebe and Sammi. It was only a pair of patterned tights but I thought they’d like them and it shows they hadn’t been forgotten.

I had bought Stella a present but she wouldn’t get it until I went back down. I hastily changed into jeans and a top and pulled on a pair of espadrilles, I checked Lizzie who was fast asleep, and snuck out again to go back to the kitchen with the bag of cream cakes.

Danni did do a fashion show for us under pressure from Livvie and Mima and Stella made approving noises for each item. “You’ve really learned how to put together a reasonable budget wardrobe, haven’t you?”

“Gee thanks, I’ve been doing it a few years now you know?”

“Six, I believe. What a difference from the scrawny kid in the torn cycling shorts I introduced to high fashion.”

“The shorts were only torn because you hit me through a hedge.”

“That’s right, try to wriggle out on the fine detail.” I began to wonder if she’d been coaching Trish or the other way round.

David came in to start the dinner, “Back already? I thought you were going to shop till you dropped?”

“Danni did, I would have been good for another month or two if the money lasted.”

He chuckled, “So who’s been eating cream cakes then?”

“Yours is in the fridge.”

“I’ll let you off then.”

“Look here, wage slave, what’s for dinner?”

“Escargot avec sauce de gastropod.”

“Snails in slug sauce?” I gasped.

“Sounds better in French,” said Stella licking her fingers.

“No it doesn’t, what’s really for dinner?”

“A leg of pork.”

“If this family gets any bigger you’ll have to leave the rest of the pig attached to feed ’em all,” suggested Stella.

When David brought it out of the fridge I wondered if the rest of the porker was attached. Seeing my gaping expression he simply said, “It was a big pig.” By my calculations it would have been about the size of a rhinoceros.

When the others arrived, Danni had to reprise her fashion show to nods and murmurs of approval from the older girls and the two men. When she went to change, Sammi was overheard saying to Julie, “She’s taking to this like a duck to water–which is a surprise.” Julie chuckled by way of reply.

So it isn’t just me then who wonders what is going on. I shall have to have words with her a bit later to see exactly what she means. They’ve all been very supportive of Danni, but are wondering why the sudden change of lifestyle–which puzzles me as well. The problem is, Danni might not be able to verbalise what is going on, so we may never know.

I was complimented on my choice of clothes by the older girls and Phoebe was particularly taken with a top we’d bought in Top Shop. She declared a visit to the one in Portsmouth as a priority next week.

Finally, David called us into dinner and the locusts sated themselves stripping the place bare. Trish chided Danni for eating too quickly, I only wished I could have done the same with Simon, who shovelled it down like it was going out of fashion. I mashed up some the vegetables and gravy and gave it to Lizzie who gobbled it down almost as quickly as Simon had–then gave huge burp and brought up half of it. I just love children.