Okay fine here Dorothy. Here is the little story you been bugging me to write all week! Hope your happy!
WARNING this may require tissue.
The chairs were old. These were not the newer soft chairs that the regular waiting room had with their comfy cushions but the old chairs dark, hard not a plastic but not a wood either type with silly chrome legs. Her thighs were already stuck to it where they stuck out from under her denim skirt.
Jaci knew that it was wrong to wear a skirt but the red tank top and blue denim skirt with its lace at the pockets was her favorite and most comfy outfit. She had debated on wearing a paisley summer dress but she didn't want to show her bra straps.
That bra. It was a plain white 32A bra with a tiny little bow in the middle of the cups. It was a new one that Tante Drea had gotten her on saturday.
"You need the support dear." was all Tante had said. It was true she felt supported and they didn't rub annoyingly across everything anymore but bra's we for girls. Jaci was supposed to be a boy she knew that. The pills she took were a hormone blocker some spiral thing and a anti water pill since they made her feet swell up. What she could not understand was if the pill was to stop her puberty then why was she still growing breasts. Mommy and Daddy will be so mad.
She was grateful that Tante had gone in for her appointment ahead of Jaci to give her time. She needed it. Dr. Saintclair was a phyco.. something. A brain doctor. She didn't need one she already knew she was a boy that had all these bad girl things in her head and that she should stop them.
Jaci got up from her chair with a mild sucking sound as her thighs left the chair and walked to the machine where Dottie had earlier selected a cola. Yep it was still in there and Dottie had tried to get it after she had walked out of her meeting. Jaci retrieved the can and put it into Tante's purse which she was carrying.
Dottie was by reception chatting animatedly with the two girls behind the counter. And from the looks of it was being told how cute she looked even though Dottie was in a pair of jeans. Jaci looked enviously at Dottie. Jeans or pants were something jaci longed to wear but there was issues with that.
Jacilynn needed some air so she walked outside although it was a really warm day, 30+ C. Jacilynn started to shiver as if she was cold. The jeans, she used to be able to wear them.
Jaci was excited after months of saving up her leftover change from her lunch money she had gotten enough to get herself some pretty clothes. She knew it was wrong and that Mommy and Daddy would be so upset with her, again. But that bad part of her made her buy them. It was a simple white blouse and a pleated grey skirt. Kinda like was she had seen girls wear to school before.
These were used from a thrift store but still they were the very first ones she had ever bought. She had convinced herself she would try them on at home and then wear them to sleep. The next day she would return them to the store and get her money back.
It was a simple plan. Her mom and dad said earlier that morning they would be late getting home from work. She had thought about the items she would buy all day and was really anxious to feel them on her skin.
Jacilynn removed the much hated boys clothing and placed them carefully on her bed. It was a boys bed, a racecar bed with its Cars bedsheets. It fit with the rest of the room. The boys iceskates they didn't fit right with the hockey stick, the baseball glove and bat hardly used. The transformers and gijoe toys placed neatly in lines on her shelf. None of these things had any interest to her. She would play with them to make her parents happy but she hated every minute.
With shaking fingers she slid the skirt up her bare hairless legs. It felt soo good she smiled wide just with the feel of it. It felt so right so free. The blouse also felt wondeful on her sensitive skin with the buttons that actually buttoned from the right side, to her anyways.
Tucking the blouse into the skirt just like she had seen girls do on TV she walked to the closet door with its mirrored surface and looked at herself. She felt so pretty so right so happy. She knew it was wrong but she twirled from side to side the pleats flaring as she turned. She couldn't help it she giggled.
She had just turned and was giggling looking at herself when she heard the slight gasp and intake of breath. Her smile disappeared instantly. A slight frown and tears replaced it before she even had a chance to think about it.
"Just what the fuck do you think your doing *****?"
"Please Daddy I can explain."She started but he was mad. Really mad this was not the first time him and his mom, who was in back of dad, had caught him wearing something feminine.
"You little freak take that shit off right now. I do not know who you stole that from. My son the thief. Well Ill teach you ..."
She couldn't remember the rest of what he said. He came over mouthing something as he then tore her blouse to shreds taking it off of her and then the skirt was ripped off her the same way. Any resistance was met with a slap to the face. But that wasn't the worst part. The worst part was the way both him and mom had forced him back into the jeans he had taken off. Boys jeans they had hurt being pulled on with her foot trapped at the wrong angle going up the leg. The too tight pull on the waist to do them up. The pain on her tortured waist from the savage removal of the skirt.
"Jaci! Jaci please Jaci!" Little Dottie was looking at her with eyes filled with worry. There was a love in them that Jacilynn had never seen in others before. Not even her parents that she loved with all her little heart had ever looked at her that way.
"I'm okay Dottie just a bad thought."
"Jacilynn please don't think the bad thoughts. You scared me." Dottie said with a slight pout.
Out of the Doctor's office came a concerned Tante Andrea and a man Jacilynn assumed was Dr. Saintclair. Tante drea looked very worried.
"Jacilynn are you alright sweetie?" Andrea asked as she dropped to her knees to hug her.
"I'm okay really Tante."
"Did you have another episode? Was it a bad one?" She asked Jacilynn with concern.
"Yes Tante. No it wasn't one of the bad ones I'll be okay really."
"Jacilynn I am Dr. Adam Saintclair. You can call me Adam. Can you tell me a little about these episodes? Inside maybe?"
Jacilynn nodded that she would but would not let go of the hands she had clamped to Dorothy and Andrea. Although the little girl had stopped visibly shaking she was still very pale.
Comments
been there, done that with the flashbacks
hopefully, the doc can help her deal with it.
and yes, it did make me cry, tels.
oh my sniff
wow thats was a bit on the shocking side and my heart goes out to jaci hoping she gets to where she wants to be , i hope there is more to this please
thanks
thank you for comment it means alot im a little depressed.
A good start, I hope there
A good start, I hope there will be more!
Hugs,
Kristy
thank
thank you for comment it means alot thank you
I understand. Comments are
I understand. Comments are very satisfying. ;)
Hugs,
Kristy
Jaci
I had to go back and reread the story so far. It really isnt a confusing story, I just needed to recall Jaci's background.
Poor thing, a girl forced to be a boy by her parents, she is not real sure of her identity right now, but knows she prefers girls clothing.
Dorothy and tels are concocting a good story between them. I hope they continue to collaborate as this story grows.
Thanks to both of you.
Don't let someone else talk you out of your dreams. How can we have dreams come true, if we have no dreams?
Katrina Gayle "Stormy" Storm
actually
Jaci was born with male genitals.
thank you for comment.
Jaci again
OK... I have reread the complete story three times now, and although it is not specifically said that Jaci was born a boy, there have been some hints that such could be the case, Dottie's question to Tante Drea wondering if Jaci was like her, a girl born in a boy's body, and Drea's reply that really doesn't answer the question for example. And Jaci's own thoughts that she knew she was a boy...but couldn't that be a result of the abuse her parents had shown trying to make her a boy?
Or have I still missed something?
If she is really a boy, then right now she is more confused than Dottie is, and the Dr.'s comment in the journal that because of the familial abuse, she is going to be more difficult to treat.
At any rate, the two of you are making this one very readable story. I am looking forward to further chapters, and perhaps even the occasional one by Andrea!
Don't let someone else talk you out of your dreams. How can we have dreams come true, if we have no dreams?
Katrina Gayle "Stormy" Storm
here is one
"The pills she took were a hormone blocker some spiral thing and a anti water pill since they made her feet swell up."
spironolactone is an anti androgen. It has a common side effect of making peoples feet swell with water. Which is funny as it is supposed to do the opposite in people with kidney problems.
okay, but in the previous
okay, but in the previous story Dottie talking to Drea says that Jaci has breasta and a period... That led me to believe she was really a girl that had been forced to act like a boy...
Still either way, enjoying the story.
hugs,
Kristy
Sad for Jaci
Tels (and Dorothy),
Sometimes it's hard to read a sad story like this episode, but feeling the feelings of pain and yearning somehow make life a little easier. Jaci's situation is very sad and her pain and confusion is heart-wrenching to read about. The flashback was very real and took the Dottie and Jaci saga to a new place for me. I'm sad for Jaci and that sadness evokes a gratefulness for the understanding people in my own life. I'm enjoying your story, even if it does bring those feelings welling up inside.
Thank you for writing,
Erica
Nice Tels!
Sorry for not reading it earlier than now, was out all afternoon/evening. Nice episode,knew you could do it! I really hurt for poor Jaci, people like her parents shouldn't be aloud to procreate! Ok Dottie, what's next? (hugs) Taarpa
Oh wow...
Even though I'd sorta braced myself for it, that flashback was ... intense. My heart is still pounding.