A Tapestry of Stars

The first thing that drew my attention when I came into my local Pride center for the first time was a large tapestry with gold stars covering it. Above the tapestry was the the words “We remember” in large glowing letters.

I went over to one of the staff and said, “Wow. That represents all the gay, lesbian, bisexual and trans people who have lost their lives?”

“Actually, that’s just for the Trans people. We need a book for the others.”

I went over to the tapestry and touched one of the stars, reading the name embossed on it and wept.

He saw my reaction, and said “You’re a girl, arent you.”

“You can tell? I’ve been in the closet so long ….”

He smiled at me, and said, “Lets just say I could see the real you peeking out. Does the fact you’re here today mean you’re considering doing more than peek?”

“I … I think I have to, but I’m scared. I could end up like one of these people.”

“I get that. But maybe, if you aren’t alone, that wont happen.”

“I dont pass, though. I cant see how I could make it work.”

“Maybe one time, you could come in as your real self, and get some objective opinions on what you need.”

“I .. I will have to think about that.” I said, and fled the building.

Weeks went by, and finally with the support of many friends online, I stepped out in a skirt, and drove down to the Pride center.

I came in the door, and the same person was at the table. When he saw me, he gave me a smile and said, “Hello. I’m glad you gave this a shot.”

“Scared to death, but somehow it felt better than I expected at the same time.” I said.

“I’m sure it did. So, what will you do now?”

“Go back home, I guess. Coming in here is one thing, going to a public place? I dont want to end up on your wall.”

“You look okay, if that helps. I dont think anybody would give you a second look.”

“Nice of you to say so.”

“I mean it. Look, its just about my lunch break, and I was going over to the mall downtown for lunch. Come with me. At least then you wont be alone if someone did act negatively.”

I looked at him carefully, and felt sure he was sincere.

“Okay. But what can we do about those people on the wall, even if you’re right?”

“We remember them. But one of the ways we can honor them is by living our lives without fear. You ready to take the plunge?” He stood and offered his arm to me.

I looked at the tapestry, and then said, “You’re.... right.” I took his arm, and we walked out the door.

“Just so you know, dear. I can’t fancy you. I’m into guys only, not pretty girls. But I would be honored to be a friend .” He said as we left.

“I .. did you say I was pretty?”

“Just like a girl, to focus on that.”

“I’m a girl.”

“Duh.”

“You know, I’m going to lunch with a strange man, and I dont even know your name?”

“I’m Mark.”

“Nice to meet you. Call me Sarah.”

“Cool. Means ‘Princess’, so it suits you.”

I blushed a bit, and then said, “Thank you.”

We had a lovely lunch, and no one seemed to think me strange looking, allowing my tension to fade.

“Thank you for this.”

“Glad I could help. Anytime I’m free, we can do the lunch thing.”

“Thank you so much. You didn’t even know me, why were you willing to do this?”

“I knew some of the people who arent on that wall, but should be. They were not killed by others, but died at their own hand because they couldn’t stand hiding but couldn’t figure out how live outside the closet. And I could tell you were at that point.”

“I... I was. Now I have hope.”

“Good. Now I have to get back to work. See you next time?”

“You know it.”

And as the old movie said, that was the start of a beautiful friendship.