Demonstration Model
When the day started it found me sitting in my recliner, wondering where my youth went.
I had just “celebrated” - if you can call it that - my fortieth birthday, and while for many people that would not have felt ancient, for me I was feeling every day of my forty years and maybe more.
The most glaring example of how my body had deteriorated was my left knee, which was carefully wrapped to try and keep it in place.
I had dislocated it rather badly two months before, and it showed no signs of getting back to full function.
That had meant I was forced to take a leave of absence from my job, and even though they had said all the right things about it still being there when I was ready to come back, I was starting to get the impression they were getting almost as impatient for my recovery as I was.
Besides my knee, I had other parts of my body that were not in the shape they had been two decades earlier, and I was extremely depressed about all those changes, which is why I was slumped in my recliner, just waiting for something to happen.
Then something did.
The doorbell rang, and I felt obligated to get it.
When I opened the door, I saw a guy who looked like he’d stepped out of some fashion magazine - from the fifties.
Brown suit, tie, briefcase, and even a fedora.
He tipped said fedora, and asked, “Do I have the honor of speaking to the lady of the house?”
“Err . . . No?” I stammered.
“Well, never mind that then. I would like to have you be a demonstration model of this remarkable new product - Healing Putty” He said.
“Well, I can't afford anything, '' I replied.
“That’s the beauty of being a demonstration model. There’s no cost to you, all we ask is that if you're satisfied by the time I leave, you will tell your friends and family about us.”
“Well . . . that sounds good.” I managed, “Just what is this stuff?”
“We call it Healing Putty. One application will heal any injuries, diseases, and even genetic flaws you might have.”
I must have looked as confused as I felt, because he continued, “Like I see you have hurt your knee. Our healing putty will fix it as good as new. Will you let me demonstrate?”
“Okay, I guess” I replied, thinking how good it would be if the stuff worked.
He opened his briefcase, pulled out a blob of something, and in a flash applied it to my knee, right over the wrap.
Within seconds, I could feel my knee tingling, and in less than a minute all the pain I had been dealing with in the knee was gone.
The salesman smiled at my astonished expression, and said, “Feels better already, yes? Well the Healing Putty isn’t done yet. It will go through your whole body, fixing anything wrong.”
And just as he said that, I could feel a tingle in my stomach. I had put on a lot of weight, and as much as I wished I could blame the bad knee, the problem went deeper than that.
The tingle got more intense, and then as I pulled up my shirt I actually saw my stomach shrink and lose the extra fat.
“Whoa” I said.
But then I felt a tingle going all over my body, and I managed to ask, “What’s happening now?”
“The Healing Putty has found some genetic flaws, it will repair them shortly. You might want to sit down, though.”
I did indeed feel dizzy, so I stumbled to my recliner and fell into it, just in time.
The tingle became a buzz, and then it was like my whole body was singing.
And then I had the biggest orgasm in my entire life, and almost fell unconscious.
The salesman approached me, and handed me a card, saying, “Well, I’d say you’re satisfied. So do make sure to tell everyone you know.”
And with that, he went out the door.
After catching my breath, I managed to get to my feet, and then almost fell back into the chair when I happened to see my reflection in a mirror.
I had lost about 15 years, and my manhood.
I was a woman.
I tried to figure out why something intended to heal me had changed my sex, but then remembered learning in a science class that the “y” chromosome, the one responsible for making a person male, is actually just a broken “X”.
So the healing putty had fixed it, making me female.
I sat back down again trying to process this.
I was still trying to work things out when the front door opened, and my wife came in.
She looked at me in shock, and I said, “Hi honey. You’re not going to believe the day I had.”
End.
Comments
'Splainin'
Gosh! I hope your explanation is listened to long enough for your wife to nod; however incredulously. Or at least to say, "Oh, that's nice, dear." I would like the salesman to drop by my place, please. He did say, as you noted, to make sure to tell everybody!
Love, Andrea Lena
giggles, hopefully her wife understands
and if I ever could, I'd send the salesman your way !
The Queen of short stories lives!
All hail the Queen! Giggles Talia, Hugs...
blushes
Well, I'll try to be the best Queen I can!
The same thing happened to me, only it was Silly Putty...
And I've been like this ever since.
Sweet little story. If only, huh?
Love the last line/punchline!
~hugs, Veronica
For anyone who doesn't know what Silly Putty is, this won't explain anything:
https://s3.amazonaws.com/s3.timetoast.com/public/uploads/pho...
What borders on stupidity?
Canada and Mexico.
.
you sure it wasn't Mermaid putty?
glad you enjoyed this bit of fluff
Wanna send me a scan of that
Wanna send me a scan of that card please?
Hugs!
Rosemary
I would if I could
but my computer ate it.
Doh!
health household & baby care / medical supplies / experimental
*Healing Putty!*
Will heal any injuries, diseases, and even genetic flaws.
"Currently unavailable. We don't know when or if this item will be back in stock."
- - - - - - - - - -
Ack! It's out of stock.
Gee, I could really use some for both reasons, starting with my left knee, and ending with the final result. doh!
>i<
you and me both!
I'm all in for a body upgrade !
huggles!
Yes, please!
A delightful little story. Perhaps you can tell us where we can get a can of this miracle putty?
"All that we see or seem, Is but a dream within a dream." Edgar Allen Poe
if I find a supplier
I'll get some for everybody
I dunno. From my 69 (now) back to 40 - s/he's >Young!<.
His-er-her Wife is just starting her unbelievable day ...
I have to wonder about the "business model" of Healing Putty, Inc.
---
It's been pointed out that the services of a (magical) Healer are beyond price, and so the Healers can command whatever price "that the will traffic bear".
---
I've met, been to lectures by, quite a few Real-World Healers [1]. And most of them of them >give away the Healing<. (You of course do need to pay for paper books (ask library), or pay for seminars or teaching 'retreats'.)
They give away the Healing. Free. Nothing to buy, no boxes, bottles or cans of 'Healer's Magic Stuff'. Nope. Take the info, take the Healing and just walk away. No strings ever. Except that we do have >use< the Healer's information to get results...
This being in the Real World, about the best they can offer is an extra seven to fourteen years of life, and better health. Reduced heart, cholesterol and 'clogging' problems, diabetes reduced or maybe gone, etc., etc.
---
[1] I'm thinking of the Buddhists I know: The Dharma is forever free. They give it away. Dana (generosity) is appreciated (hey, they have food, housing, etc. costs just like all of us). For retreats, food and lodging do cost them, so expect to cover those costs.
charging for healing
if I could heal, I would not charge beyond maybe a meal or a place to sleep for the night. but I imagine there would be people who would feel justified in charging much more . . .