I Woke, Part 8

I shook. I had awoken from a nightmare, the worst I had had since I was accidentally trapped in the body of Allison Allen. Allison’s mom came in, and took me into her arms, and I found myself unable to stop from telling her about the nightmare.

I said, “I dreamt of going back to school, and being unable to fit in because I couldn’t remember how to behave, and failing all my classes, and then having to go to court and not being able to testify and my attacker getting away with it, and . . . “ somehow, I managed to stop myself from telling her the last part of my dream, where Allison’s spirit held me accountable for ruining her life, and found me guilty, just before I woke up.

Allison’s mom gave me a hug, and said “Hun, try and not worry about either school or any trial right now. You have a week of spring break left, so if your memory doesn’t return by then, we will make some decisions about school then. As for the trial, I imagine it will be some time before they can take the case to trial, and again, we will deal with the situation when it is actually here."

"Meanwhile, I will help you with your bath again today, if you want, and then we can get ready for church." So that’s what she did, and by the time I was fully ready for church, I had calmed a little. It was my first time in heels and hose since I got stuck in Allison’s body, but I managed to cover any awkward movements by using the cane the hospital had sent home with me.

I wondered what kind of church The Allen family would attend, and it turned out to be not too different except they had a woman as the preacher, which would have been a scandal in the church I had grown up in. I found out that Allison has a nice singing voice, not really surprising since she had apparently been a star in a musical at school.

Everyone at the church seemed to know Allison, and many came up to offer hugs or to shake my hand and tell me they were praying for my full recovery. After the service, Allison’s mom surprised me when she told me “Mr. Collins’ family has graciously said we can visit him in ICU anytime. You want to go?”

I thought about it, and realized I was curious to see my old body again, and so said “O.K.” So we went over to the hospital, and my mom was waiting for us in the ICU. “How is he doing?” asked Allison’s mom. “The same,” said my mother, “Physically, he is healing, but he . . . Just won’t wake up.”

That made sense to me, as my spirit wasn’t in that body at the moment to operate it. I hugged my mother, and asked, “What are they going to do?” “We may have to make some hard choices if he doesn’t make some progress soon. “ My mom said. I shook, and realized they were talking about letting my body die.

“Please, can you hold off?” I asked. They both looked at me strangely, and I stuttered, and said “I mean, maybe he will wake up, if he gets a chance. Besides, I want to know about him.” “Allison, I am sure Mrs. Collins will do what she thinks best.” Allison’s mom said. “I know, I am sorry” I said, “I just don’t want him to die” My mom said, “don’t worry Allison. We will take our time making the call. And we can go into the cafeteria and I will try and tell you all about Mark.”

So we went there, and she spent an hour telling me my life story as she saw it. She ended with saying, “Mark was . . . Unhappy. Struggling with something we never really understood. But he was a good person, and I am not surprised he stopped to help you. I am sure Mark would be happy to see you up and about, and would want nothing more than to see you able to get on with your life.”

I couldn’t help feeling the irony of that statement, and not trusting my self to reply, I gave her a hug instead, and taking Allison’s mom’s hand, left the cafeteria, and asked her to take me home. Once there, she helped me out of my church clothes and helped me change into something much more casual and comfortable. Allison’s dad came home, and the three of us cuddled together until bedtime. I was a little reluctant to go to bed alone, but soon, I fell asleep.

The next morning, after breakfast, we got a surprise phone call, and I listened as Allison’s mom responded with shock to something said, and she said “Can they do that?, Well, keep us informed. I asked her “What was that about mom?” She told me, “It was the Crown attorney. Apparently, your attacker’s lawyers have pushed for an speedy trial.
The Crown prosecutor said he thought they had found out about your memory loss, and are hoping that if they can get the case heard before you are recovered, without your testimony he might go free.” “Then the nightmare I had the other night is coming true.” I said.

“Now, Ally, don’t think like that. I told you, we will deal with it when it comes. First, a judge will have to agree to the speeded up trial, and then, we will have to see if they can do without you.” Allison’s friends came over, but I really didn’t feel like going out with them, so they stayed for a while, and we looked through Allison’s yearbooks, her textbooks, and her notes, hoping that I might be able to recall something.

I asked them, “Did I have a lot of boyfriends? “ Nicky said “No, we never saw you with anybody special until this year.“ They showed me the playbill from the musical Allison had starred in and I looked at it, and found something I could remember in it - the picture of the male lead. “That’s him, isn’t it. Bill Mallery. He was my . . . “ I found I couldn’t finish the sentence.

“Yeh, I guess its ok to tell you that you guys hit it off doing that musical together, He had had a reputation as a bit of a player, and we were a little worried he would get you in the sack and then dump you, but you were really crazy about him, and it seemed like you were really happy together.” I told them about the phone call, and about my dream of freezing on the stand.

“Don’t you worry about anything Ally” said Lisa, “We will be with you all the way, okay?” “O . . Okay.” I managed. Once again I realized just how lucky a girl Allison had been, with her parents and her friends in her corner. They stayed for lunch, and after they left, I went back to Allison’s room.

She had a laptop, and I wondered if she had a diary or journal or something on it. I sat on a chair and realized I would need a password, and wondered how I could get it. I tried closing my eyes, and just letting Allison’s fingers remember, and surprisingly, it worked. I was soon on Allison’s home page and reading her blog.

What her friends had said was true. Allison had had a few boys she had feelings for, and some who she sensed had feelings for her, but nothing serious until this boy Bill played opposite her.
Spending hours together in rehearsals, playing boyfriend and girlfriend led to the real thing. He had had a lot of different girls since he had started high school, none of them lasting longer than 2 - 3months, but no one had warned Alley of anything other than maybe getting a disease, getting pregnant, or just getting her heart broken when he tired of her.

Certainly, nobody had seen him as a rapist, or someone who would try and run somebody over with his truck. My ability to get Allison’s password and the memory flashes I had had since I became trapped in her body gave me an idea. Could I call on her memory on cue, like say in the courtroom?

I looked at Allison’s notes and textbooks, and found it more familiar than I could have hoped considering how long it had been since I was in high school the first time around. For the first time since I had become stuck in her body, I felt that there was at least a chance that I could get through this without ruining her life for her.

I still had a lot to worry about, with my old body hanging by a thread, and my ability to remember her life could end up erasing me from existence, but at least I felt some hope that things were going to work out. I had never been a big faith person, I had always struggled with doubts, but maybe, just maybe, there was a purpose behind all this.

With that bit of hope to hold on to, I fell asleep, and slept through the night for the first time since I had gotten stuck living this girls life. I could only wait to see what would happen next.