Someone messed with the radio in my car and rather than my usual Tweeny Pop station, I found myself listening to Public Radio. They were reviewing a book by Jessica Stern called "Denial: A Memoir of Terror. This woman has been to Afghanistan, Iraq, Iran, and who knows where else interviewing known terrorists. She says she interviewed 40 of them and in every single case, the boys in the Islamic schools were subjected to sexual assault as a means to control them and to aid in radicalizing them. As she talked to these individuals, every one of them wanted to disgrace the west or their victims.

I used to weep and kill my pillow after my shrink said that my emotional development had been arrested. My God, I can't remember her breaking any laws! At the time, she said I was emotionally 12. Oh, God no! I did not want to go through being 12 again. Imagine me driving on busy freeways! Yalla!

So, now she will give me 17! GAH!

That must be why I listen to Shakira, Katy Perry, Taylor Swift, GaGa, Ke$ha, Avril Lavigne and other pop grls.

If you were a sworn officer in the last 20 years in a relatively large metropolitan area, or have done vice, I need to talk to you, please. Just needing a reality check here. We can talk on the phone or skype or email ...

Much peace.

Gwen

THIS IS A STORY IDEA FOR ANYONE WHOSE MUSE IS UNINSPIRED

Little Johnny was a special little child. At three he had the vocabulary of a 4th grader and had begun on the Piano; doing astonishingly well for someone with hands so tiny. At 4 he realized that his thing was an outie and his sisters, a year younger than he, had none. Hmmmm

I don't know what happened to me! It is not my fault, I did nothing wrong! My intentions were pure before Allah SWT!

It was pure boredom, and in total desparation, that I turned that glass thing on in the living room, and after a short time found myself laughing until my sides split. And to my total shock found that the program I was watching was called "Friends"! OH MY! What has happened to me! I solemly swear that I never watched that program before because it causes brain damage to anyone I know who has watched it.

I was sorting through a stack of paperwork, hunting for an unpaid bill, when I happened upon one of my old journals where I kept story ideas. GASP! You would not believe what I found! Giggle!!!!!!

Here the idea is in the following:

He'll never find that Candle!

One of our Authors has taken me by the hand and led me to a place on this site that I did not know exists. It is indeed a very pleasant surprise to find a spot in the "Add Stories" um thingie, that says TG Universes and series.

Would it be posible to have a tab that would take us to those Universes so that we might read the the stories?

Much Peace.

Khadijah Gwen

Well, I have been looking at a lot of hands lately, ever since I heard that guy's ring fingers are longer than their pointer fingers. Well, in a week, I have seen three women with guy fingers. One of them has a baby, and the other two are either extremely good T girls or genetic women. And, to top it off, I know a guy with so called girl hands.

Hmmmmm

Gwen

I find myself feeling rather fearful and nervous about meeting I am attending at 12:00 today.

The purpose of it is to comment on Treatment Protocols for the GBLT set at OHSU, here in Portland. I don't find myself feeling very charitable toward them as I think they are a pretentious, self important bunch. They seem to filter everything one of us says with filters that put some sort of bizarre Freudian spin on it.

They seemed to feel rather insulted when I walked away from them and went on to actually have a real life, and without their mind numbing drugs.

I have been working on a story for me that is in a very different voice, and feels very different than anything I have ever written. It is action, funk and gore, Sci Fi and lots of other devices that I have never used. I am just a little concerned that where I take the end will offend some of you. It is not intended. I am an American Citizen, a Veteran, and very loyal to the US.

I thought I had it finished a couple weeks ago, but then my muse drug me off to Worcester for a month. GAH ! My protag really needed shopping therapy! LOL My research has been exausting

I'd really like to see one of our good authors write a story from the point of view of a Big Hunky Manly Man who meets a special girl. At first he doesn't suspect at all, though she is sort of Tom Boyish. He likes her brashness, and sturdiness, but he is also attracted to her kindness, modesty and bright mind.

Maybe she's a lady fire fighter, or landscaper girl, or Doctor, or even a Fighter Pilot?

The whole point is they meet, work together for a long time and then he finds he is becoming attached to her and ... well good things happen to her after that.

So, this week end, I got a call from my Brother and he needed my help. Well, actually he did not need my help, he wanted me to change the window motors and the Alternator on his Ford Pick Up. He was not intending to help. He gets to angry and frustrated with these things. Well, I wanted to say I couldn't do it because I'm a girl, but to be fair, he has the mechanical aptitude of a Frog.

I assume that numbers of you have seen this on CNN by now. I do plan to try to see the film.

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/showbiz/2010/04/27/nat.tran...

Much Peace

Gwen

I am so "NOT SPORTS" that I never ever, ever never thought I would be writing on the olympics. I was looking for something else today and happened upon a photo of Caster Semena at the finish line with the defeated trailing out behind her. I have just tried very hard to ignore the whole debacle, but now that I have seen the other competitors, GAD, look whose talking? Many of her competitors look more muscled and masculine than her! So, what is going on here? Is it really about her Kariotype or is it just about sore losers?

In the past few days, I have been called "irritating, arrogant, and other stuff". I noticed that my last two posts have not survived. So, is someone deleting me, or am I simply, stupidly not hitting the second screen? I know that some of you don't like me, but... I dunno?

Gwen

Well, I had to try to live as a Man again; try to get my family back; and try to find balance in my life.

1. I found out that Female is the balance in my life.

1. I found out that my family's issue with me was not about my being a woman, but about the lies that my x told about me. I don't even know what those lies were, because my son won't tell me. Is this familiar to any of you?

1. I got 5 years of hair growth taken off. She gave me a lesbian hair cut. She thought I was a FtM.

I used to use SKYPE a lot; spending hours talking to my friends. I used to talk to one of my friends in Qatar, who is a patron of BC, and another who lives in Saudia, plus several people here in the US. Then the service overseas, began to gradually deteriorate, and then the finally in the states. It got so I kept it on and mostly talked only to those who called me on it, if the service was working that day.

10 years ago, there were some interesting Victorian Era Corset Training stories lurking on the internet, and I used to enjoy reading them once in a while. They were not TG and some dealt with coeds in finishing school. One which was TG in a sense was "Prisoner of Fashion", or something like that. I notice that these sites and sources have basically disappeared. :)

Gwen

This morning I was rumaging through my closet and found my first skirt from the 49th time I began accumilating clothing. I wore it on my first expedition from the house to attend a GID support group. Amazingly, I doubt that I will ever be able to wear it again, can't even get it up past my hips, and it makes me wonder if I could ever wear it. Who was that person?

I will remember that day until I die.

Gwen

I once read a poem, probably written in the 19th or early 20th century. It is a dramatic poem, and I have heard it recited with a musical background.

Roughly, one of the lines is something like 'the moon is white instead of yellow' or visa versa. It made so much sense to me in the mental state I was in at the time.

Can anyone remember that poem?

Many Blessings

Gwen

What does this have to do with anything TG?

Nuttin'.

I just thought it was so cute, and having spent a fair amount of hours on a rmachine in that size range I know how dangerous it is for the dancer and how hard it is for the operator.

In the US, a show like this could not be done. OSHA, and all the, um, government control freaks would be swarming like ants on honey.

Enjoy.

Gwen

http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-414637?hpt=Mid

As I interact with the world around me, a difference in the way life is and the stories I read and write becomes evident. I don't seem to attract male males into my life, though I do have a dear gay guy friend. Indeed, almost all of the friends I have here where I live in Portland are College age genetic females, and most of them think of me as sort of a pseudo Mom. So, I hear all their expressions of joy and all their sadnesses, and drama.

I've just made an interesting discovery about my Word 2007, Windows Explorer, and Asstr.org.

I used to be able to easily delete files in Word, and I could easily find the file path. Now, I can't. I also used to be able to locate files very easily in Windows Explorer, and now I notice that there are some files that I can see In "Recent Documents" in Word 2007 that I can not find with Windows Explorer, and that leads me to suspect that they are in actuality "Links" to those files. I have opened a couple of them and watched Word, go to the internet and download those files from ASSTR.org.

Maybe you veterans can tell me what to make of this. Maybe this is as good as it is going to get.

Dear Dad,