Harry Potter and the Trouble With Neurotypicals: Book Four.
Or, "Autistic Potter and the Goblet of Fire."

Notes: I do not own this. J. K. Rowling does. This is just fan fiction. No money is being made. Not by me, anyway.

There may be a few bits and pieces lifted word-for-word from the canon material. I tried to do that as little as possible, though, but there's a lot more in this one than usual because it was unavoidable. Still, lots of details are changed, so don't skip by familiar parts or you might miss something.

"I said that I ..."

"I heard what you said!" I put the back of my hand to my forehead. It was less dirty.

"Look in case you have forgotten I have er..plumbing issues." well it wasn't like I could come out and say I was a guy. Though why nobody seemed to see that was a puzzle. Then again I do look a little too much like Ari in the face. But I do have a guy's body.. mostly... Okay so the stick on breasts would fool most guys.

Biker Bitch
By
Michele Nylons

Chapter Ten: Sisters of Satan

Cassie is directed to meet with a small all-female Motorcycle Club with a view to standover them and tithe the Casino from which they make their money, laundering cash for the mob. After a salacious meeting with President of the club, Cassie has second thoughts.

Jerry Tanner has a a lot of experience with games, but can he survive being caught in a game played by the gods?

Tanstaafl. Sounds like a sneeze or something vaguely Russian. The meaning of the word is best shown in a story retold freely from the writing of Robert A. Heinlein, the inventor of the water bed and the coiner of the word. Seems a young man, newly hired as a traveling salesman, was passing through a new town about lunchtime. Stopping at a likely looking taproom, he enters to find a large sign stating: "FREE LUNCH WITH YOUR DRINK!"

A Game Of Cards

Chapter 4

" Girls Night!"

" What? No! I've already been enough of a girl today. I'm not doing anything girly anymore."

Jake had a stern look on his face. Jen pleaded Jake with a cute face but his mind was made up. Jen resorted to her last option.

Ethiopian

“I’ve never had Ethiopian before,” Autumn climbed out of the back seat of our Outback. We had sat together in the back, holding hands all the way, while my mom asked questions.

“Eet-hio-pian,” I corrected her before my mom could. “It’s good. You’re okay with spicy, right?”

“It’s not my favorite. I’m not a frat boy with something to prove.”

“If you can heal any wound and resist poisons, then you must be burned until your body is reduced to ashes and the ashes scattered.”

“Do it. I want to die,” Marcellus firmly declared. “About my farm... my signet ring tells the family running it and the authorities that the holder is the owner. It’s yours as a reward for ending my life. Also, in my kit is the spear head I used to pierce Jesus. I kept it as a memento... it’s yours now.”

Hey wow, me on the television!

It all started when I got a call from someone with the Sally Opra Donahue Show. Their schedule said it was time to put a crossdresser on exhibit and they wondered if I was interested. Someone down there had been reading my columns, it seems. I patiently explained that I was known as the Bearded Lady for good reason, I had a full, dark, bushy beard and was unlikely to be seen as a woman. The only response was "Hey - kinky. That's great! The audience will love it."

Biker Bitch
By
Michele Nylons

Chapter Nine: Fuck the Trans Cooze!

After the ATF raid Cassie gets taken to the County Jail but refuses to cooperate so she is thrown in cells where she is left to the mercy of four gangbangers who have a penchant for the pretty transsexual

I have been reading TV literature for about twenty years now, and one thing I have noticed is that there seems to be an aversion to speaking about bodily functions. (No, I will not descend to the level of toilet humor, thank you. For that you can watch cable TV.) This always seemed to me rather odd, as we put so much effort into changing our bodies. Way back when, when I was experimenting with creating a more feminine figure, I would have loved advice on how to do it, but such intimate details were not available.