The Daily Dormouse. (aka Bike) Part 1715 by Angharad Copyright © 2012 Angharad All Rights Reserved.

Sammi wasn’t wearing much makeup but she blushed when the girl at the makeup counter asked her to clean it off and handed her some wipes and a mirror. In fact, I detected almost a hint of panic when I asked the girl about what Sam needed in the way of basic makeup.

The three young uns were excited at seeing it happen and at times I felt like strangling them as they kept interrupting the woman as she was trying to explain to Sam what she was doing and why.

At the end we had a list of the products to use, I bought about half of them–not believing she needed foundation or four shades of eye shadow. We got some cleanser and I bought the girls a small box each of eye makeup remover pads. I knew exactly what would happen, they’d be home two seconds before the big makeup set I bought them would be out and they’d be running about looking like Cheryl Cole on steroids.

While we were in the shop, we looked at the clothes and I saw a lovely suit which Sammi might find useful for formal occasions. She tried it with a blouse Livvie found and it looked really good–classic cut with an A line skirt and jacket with a double vent in the back in a grey pinstripe. It cost me a hundred pounds which had Sam looking totally flustered.

“I wish you weren’t spending all this money on me, Cathy.”

“Just enjoy it,” offered Livvie.

“Yeah, she does it for everyone,” confirmed Trish.

“She didn’t do it fow me,” complained Mima.

“I tell you what, Meems, when you're Sam’s age, I’ll buy you a suit.” That seemed to placate her and she stopped whining, the other two smirked as they saw she’d been had.

After dinner, the others insisted on a fashion show and poor Sam had to undergo ordeal by enthusiasm, however, they all agreed our choices were good ones especially the suit and blouse, for which Livvie took a bow.

I managed to get Sam on her own a little later. Tom putting the three mouseketeers to bed–he loves the task. We sat in my study, clutching mugs of tea. “Has it been a good day for you?” I asked.

“It’s been totally, like, brilliant...” she hesitated.

“But you feel you’re losing control?”

“I’m sorry–I really don’t like, want to sound ungrateful...”

“But I’m rushing you.”

She looked at the carpet, “Yeah.”

“I know, but I’ve enjoyed it, too.” I sipped my tea, “The good news is, that’s it–you’ve got enough clothes to set off on the journey to womanhood, if that’s what you want, or some nice things to wear while you sit and fret in your bedsit.”

“What d’you mean?”

“It might have felt like I was taking over, but it was only to get you a very basic wardrobe so you could start to transition if you want or not–entirely up to you.”

“What, you’re just dropping me, now you’ve had your fun?”

“No, I’m here with all the others when you’re ready to take the plunge. We’ll help all we can–but we can’t do it for you nor can we make the decision for you.”

“I feel scared.”

“That isn’t an inappropriate feeling to have, given what you might be on the verge of doing–I think, no, I know I’d be scared myself.”

“I wouldn’t have thought anything frightened you.”

“It does, I can assure you of that. In fact I’m frightened for you, I’ve seen some of the pitfalls with Julie–it’s not an easy path to take–and remember, no one is forcing you to take it.”

“I know, I’m just so scared–what if people laugh at me?”

“Those who do are hardly worthy of notice, so ignore them. Those who become belligerent, avoid at all costs, but do take notice of them. They can be dangerous. The law is behind you, the university is behind you–and so are we, your sort of adopted family.”

“I wish you were my family–they’re a bunch of shites.”

“Try and see their point of view–you’re something they can’t understand...”

“They don’t want to.”

“Possibly, but they might also be unable to simply because they don’t have the intellectual or emotional resources to do so. Parents rarely abandon their children lightly.”

“Mine have. You are basically all I have–so I don’t know if I have the strength to carry this through on my own.” The moist eyes gave way to a dam burst and she sobbed uncontrollably in my arms for several minutes. “I wish I had a mother like you,” she sobbed, the tears dripping down my shoulder.

“I think you’re a bit too close to my age for me to adopt you, even in an unofficial way.”

“I wish you would, I’m only a few weeks older than Julie.”

I should really learn to keep my mouth shut.

“Would it help if you stayed here a few days?”

She nodded, “Yes please.”

“What are you going to do about lectures?”

“I don’t know.”

“You need to decide what you want to do and let people know. I’ll help all I can, but it has to be your decision.”

“What would you do?”

“I can’t comment because I’m not being faced with such a decision, am I?”

“No, you know what you are.”

“Don’t you?”

“I don’t think I know anything anymore.”

“Why don’t you phone in and say you’re not well and will be back in probably after the weekend.”

“Can I do that?”

“Of course you can, you’ll need to make up the work at some point, but get them to email what you need to keep up to date on. Is there anything you need from your bedsit?”

“Only my laptop.”

“How private is your apartment?”

“A flight of stairs–why?”

“I could take you to get it now.” Which is what we did, Julie came along for moral support and helped Sam carry all the books and notes she felt she needed as well as few items of personal effects. An hour later we were back and I bid them both goodnight.

“She’s moving in then?” Simon quipped as we got into bed.

“You have a problem with that?”

“No except it keeps my wife away from me.”

“I’m here now, work keeps my husband away from me.”

“Oh good, while he’s away let’s play.” Simon has a much better sense of fun than I do–I seem to have never really been a child, my parents dragged me up to be responsible for everything I did. Si seemed to have been brought up to be irresponsible about everything–but he certainly has some fun.

I let him have his fun, though I was too distracted to participate fully in the play acting sex. I did grunt and groan on cue for a few moments, so he thought I’d joined him in our connubial bliss. I hope he never finds out that I often fake it.