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(aka Bike) Part 1656 by Angharad Copyright © 2012 Angharad
All Rights Reserved. |
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I pleaded with Stella to go and collect the girls for me, and she did so on condition she could use my car. I reluctantly handed over the keys. I was left with her two who were asleep at the moment, and my still sobbing baby–not counting, a probably sobbing twenty year old, as well.
I cuddled Catherine and she finally stopped crying. I placed her in the play pen with her favourite doll and dashed upstairs. Jacquie’s door was shut with a chair wedged behind it. I hope I don’t need to climb in the window again because I can’t get the ladder up by myself, Simon had to do it last time.
I listened against the door, there was crying coming from within–so she hadn’t tried to kill herself–yet. “Jacquie, will you open the door, please?”
The crying stopped for a moment, then, a response, “No, go away.”
“I’m afraid I can’t do that, sweetheart. So either you open the door for me or I’ll have to call someone else to come to see you.”
“Who?” her tone sounded more anxious than aggressive.
“Your therapist, or I could call the probation service if you’d prefer?”
“No, I don’t want to see them.”
“Please open the door.”
“I don’t want to.”
“I need you to, Jacquie.”
“Please go away.”
“I will once I’ve spoken to you.”
“Promise?”
“If you promise not to harm yourself, then yes.”
“You’ll try to trick me.”
“I promise I won’t. I just want to talk.”
I heard a chair move and then the door opened a crack and half a face peered out of the split down the side of the frame. “Talk,” she said.
“Open the door properly, please.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Please, as head of this family, I have the authority to ask you to do as I say.”
“Tom is head.”
“That’d be news to him.”
“Simon, is then.”
“That would be an even bigger surprise. I’m in charge here, so please do as I ask, like a good daughter would.”
“I don’t want you as my mummy anymore, you don’t trust me.”
“That’s for you to decide, but you’re still under my roof so you must respect my rules.”
“Or what?”
“I’ll have to ask you to leave.”
“An’ if I refuse?”
“I will call the probation service.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“Who is your probation officer?”
“Maggie Swinton, why?”
I pulled my mobile from my jeans pocket and pressed speed dial. “Could I speak to Maggie Swinton, please? Thanks, I’ll hold.” I looked at the horrified face at the door. “They’ve gone to look for her, she’s in the building.”
“No, please, Mummy, I’ll open the door.” The chair was moved again and the door opened. I clicked off my phone after saying to my answer service, “That’s okay, I’ll try again later.” I replaced the phone in my pocket.
She let me into the room. “Would you have sent me back?” she sobbed at me.
“I didn’t come to discuss that, I came to apologise. I panicked when I discovered that Catherine was missing, because I genuinely didn’t hear you say where you were going.”
“You actually thought I’d hurt her, Mummy?”
“I wasn’t thinking at all, sweetheart. Stella had wound me up and I discovered her missing and didn’t know where she was or where you were. I rushed all round the house and Stella said you’d gone out.”
“You didn’t answer my question, Mummy?”
“I did, I didn’t know what I thought. Possibly, part of me did relive old prejudices, I don’t know. If I did then I am ashamed of myself, because I know you didn’t hurt that little boy, so I honestly don’t believe you’d hurt any other child, especially one you knew.”
“You’re trying to confuse me now, aren’t you?”
“No, I’d like to help you, and I’d like you to trust me again, as I trust you.”
“But, Mummy, you didn’t trust me, did you?”
“Part of me did, part of me was so frightened I wasn’t thinking at all.”
“Why were you frightened, Mummy?”
“Because I worry about you.”
“In case I hurt your babies?”
“No, more in case you hurt yourself. I think you are far more at risk than my children.”
“That’s really why you came to see me, isn’t it, in case I revoke my promise and kill myself–that would really embarrass you, wouldn’t it?”
“Do you really think that?”
“Yes, I do.”
“Well, I’ve been very embarrassed before and lived through it–so think on that.”
“You don’t love me, do you, Mummy?”
“Why d’you think, I’m here now?”
“So you don’t have to explain to the police.”
“I’ve dealt with worse things with the police.”
“I don’t believe you, Mummy?”
“How about them finding someone in the drive with one of my arrows in him?”
“You shot someone with a bow and arrows?”
“It was self defence.”
“And they believed you?”
“He was going to shoot a bodyguard we had here.”
“And you killed him?”
“No, I hit him with an arrow, I don’t think it killed him.”
“Not much of a shot then, are you, Mummy?”
“It might be harder to disable someone than kill them.”
“Did you know the police don’t shoot to disable, they shoot to kill, they say because a disabled gunman can still shoot back. So they shoot to stop someone, or so one of my friends in the YOI said. Her dad was a copper, didn’t stop her beating an old lady to death for her pin number.”
“Charming friends you have.”
“She didn’t shoot someone with a bow and arrow.”
“Robin Hood did.”
“So are you, Maid Cathy, then?
“I think by being married, it would make me Mistress Catherine, wouldn’t it?”
“Yeah, I s’pose so.”
“Do I take it, you’ll honour your promise to me?”
“Why? You gonna shoot me full of arrows if I don’t?”
“Nah, it blunts the tips and the blood stains the shafts.”
“Ugh, gross, Mummy, too much information.”
“Probably. I must go and check on the baby, unless you’d like to do it for me?”
“Aren’t you frightened that I’ll kill her, I am a convicted killer you know?”
“No, you won’t harm her, remember you told an old lady that she was your baby sister–so that means you love her.”
“I could do it for badness.”
“I could say the same about calling the probation service or the police.”
“Or filling me full of arrows?” she smirked.
“Yeah, that too. Of course if I did that we’d have to dispose of the body, but we have a pit out the back, so some quicklime and you’d be no more very soon. Or we could do an old fashioned cremation on a log pyre, that almost completely destroys a body.”
“You are sick, Mummy, gross.”
“Not really, I’m a pragmatist. You hurt me, you pay for it.”
“But you’re an angel, Trish and Julie said so.”
“To some, the angel of death.”
“I thought you were a healer, not a killer?”
“And I thought you were wrongly convicted by a miscarriage of justice.”
“I was, Mummy.”
“So maybe, I really am a healer, an angel–but do you really want to test me? What if angels can also destroy? What about the last plague to befall the Egyptians, the Passover and all that?”
“I don’t think I like you, Mummy, you frighten me.”
“Do I? I don’t mean to, but to everything there is an equal and opposite reaction. At least according to Newton, there is. Perhaps he was right, but would you take that risk?” I felt like Dirty Harry, ‘This here is a magnum, the world’s most powerful handgun...’ it wasn’t a comfortable feeling.
“But I want you to love me, Mummy, not hurt me.”
“Which is exactly what I want to do as well, so will you go and check on Catherine, while I check Fiona and Puddin’?”
She went off down the stairs and I went into Stella’s rooms–her two were still asleep. I wandered back downstairs wondering what I’d achieved–not much, I’d probably frightened her, I’d certainly frightened myself with my cold bloodedness, or pretend sang-froid. Sometimes I didn’t like myself at all, now might be one of them. But at least we were talking–so far.
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Comments
Tonight's episode
This didn't turn out as I anticipated and I'm not at all sure I'm happy with it. So comments from readers will be especially welcome, as I might redo it.
Angharad.
Angharad
not sure
I like the cathy I saw here. Guess it could be a case of tough love. Need some tenderness after all that. Trip out for ice cream?
Powerful stuff
It's good as it is, reads well and left me emotionally drained at the end of a long day with a sick child.
Please leave it as it is
Shiraz
A bit wierd
Didn't seem like the Cathy we know was doing the talking. Far too hard and the blood and guts talk just aren't the style of someone squeamish about doing dissections.
Still appreciate every episode though!
Aud.
It's like Cathy was
It's like Cathy was channeling some vengeful Old Testament (or earlier) goddess.
Kris
{I leave a trail of Kudos as I browse the site. Be careful where you step!}
Leave it be
After all, in real life people aren't always rational and always say the right thing at the right time. Cathy may have gone a little overboard, but perhaps it was necessary to install in Jacquie that while she does love her, she's not infallible and has caused death and destruction herself - albeit for the purposes of protecting her family.
As for "Maid Cathy", I'm reminded of the old children's sitcom Maid Marian and her Merry Men (Wikipedia|Theme) - the plot basically being that Marian was the de facto leader of the gang, while Robin was a bit of a wimp who took the credit because he thought it was a cool image to cultivate.
As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!
I didn't want to answer....
I didn't want to answer right away - I posted my reaction to the story elsewhere.
As to how the story turned out. I do NOT believe "happy" is the right term...
You showed Cathy as a flawed human. You forced Jacquie to see Cathy as flawed. You made Cathy face some hard facts - and still deal with someone who was hurt, hurt far worse than Cathy has been hurt.
Do people deal with such things perfectly? Far from it. When emotions run high, people say and do things that seem to not be based on any facts. Many times, these things are things that are regretted later.
If you revise this - you change it. It will be okay. If you leave it as is - you will have some major issues to be resolved over the coming days. Some of the issues were there before, just under the surface. Perhaps this event just brought them out "faster"... But deal with them in some way, yeah. That's kinda important.
Me - I think it's nice seeing that Cathy's flawed...
Thank you.
Annette
It wasn't too bad
You are writing these episodes almost daily. I know you don't play baseball in the UK, but a baseball player doesn't hit the ball into the stands every time he is up. So if you think the odd episode is not as good as you would have liked, don't sweat it, just remember that a baseball batting average of .400 is great, and I think your average is way higher than that.
Re-do or not to re-do is that a question.......Dohhhh!!
Kathy seems a bit cold here and nothing is actually resolved.Jacquie appears very frightened and has lost her trust in Kathy.Perhaps a slight tweek might be in order.
devonmalc
Hmmm, winging it
So did Cathy lay it on a bit thick with the nasty things can happen rather than the nice? Not sure, I mean you don't rehearse speeches like that do you, they come and will often not quite be the perfect little soliloquy. So Jacquie is a bit upset, fair enough and Cathy is mildly ashamed of her fears and actions. I do not get the impression that Jacquie truly believes all the blood n guts stuff and is far more wishful of the sweetness and light and possible family. A bit of hurt for sure but nothing that can't be mended. Some serious but gentle talking will do it and look at what is and what could be.
Despite my reservations of this whole subplot it can work out well I have faith, but Saint Cathy aint and all is not sweetness and light and people are mostly good and yes the world can be a lovely place. Pedal on Ang.
Kristina
leave it as it is
Angharad,
Leave it as it is, Cathy needs to vent her frustrations sometimes and as long as she has another long talk with Jacquie things will work out in Cathy's Favor.
Hugs Roo:)
ROO
Thank you Angharad,
I vote with Shiraz,leave it as is ,Jacquie needs to accept the reality of her situation
and that she had also hurt Cathy's feelings,putting her in a panic about the child missing
and not knowing where she is if Jacquie had decided to do away with herself.Frightening!!
ALISON
Not sure about how
Cathy treated Jacquie it did seem a little harsh ... But maybe thats what Jacquie needed... As to whether to tweak it slightly Anghard, Well it your choice and i can understand if you feel it needs it, But in all honesty my view would be to leave it as it is ...
Kirri
Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 1656
Considering that Stella really caused it by winding up Cathy, let her see Jacquie in care of her twain to wind her up
May Your Light Forever Shine
Different ...
It's a very different Cathy than we've seen before, but it's not outside the realm of what I would expect from her. Sometimes tough love is necessary, and it is natural to question if you've gone too far, especially if you don't push it like that that often, which Cathy almost never has.
Of course, if you wanted a redo, I wouldn't argue.
Redo or not redo
I would vote for a minor revision. This made Cathy sound as though she was a cold hearted killer (possibly to get Jacquie's attention) but Jacquie seems to need support rather than fright (she's had enough of that in the past). Cathy has shown that she is smarter than this in the past, so I think she needs a little rehab.
Rehab ...
... can occur in the following episodes. We all have bad days, and Cathy just decided to use the wrong style of persuasion here.
A revision may be cleaner, but the challenge of letting this stand is also interesting.
It seemed rushed.
You okay Angie?
This chapter did seem a bit rushed and some of the argument seemed a bit confused and unresolved.
Even before I read your own concerns about it, I had that 'hmmm' feeling in my unsettled gut. If seemed a bit weak and ... well lost. You seem to have wandered away from any sort of plot here. (Was there too much dialogue?) I ask myself. The dialogue seemed vague and undirected.
Go and get a good night's sleep and possibly take a night off tommorrow. Me thinks your batteries need re-charging.
I can stand a night without 'Bike' ... Just!
Bev.
OXOXOX.
There ARE times...
There ARE times where being a parent is very difficult. It can be more challenging if the kids aren't yours, as you don't necessarily have the same "inherent" authority.
As to fear of what happened to a kid... Oy... A missing kid would scare me! And, given Cathy's families history I'd not have been surprised to discover that Jaquie and the baby had been kidnapped while Stella was winding Cathy up. Oy...
Thank you for things as they are.
Annette
Irrelevant
The fact that Jacquie was convicted of a crime that she didn't commit is irrelevant. Cathy was genuinely concerned for both Jacquie and the baby and Stella's wind-up caused both J and baby C to be 'missing, whereabouts unknown.'
Anything that Cathy said in the aftermath of finding them both safe was quite understandable, even if heated and ill thought out.
I suggest leaving the episode as it is, warts and all. It shows that parental love can sometimes result in pain on either side - and sometimes on both sides.
S.
Not a comfortable moment...
...but real; someone acting anxious over real concerns? Frightened? Worried? Something everyone in the family needs to see and understand. Cathy has been through hell with this family for years without any significant break from peril or loss or sad grief, and while it might not have been fair for Jacquie to be the recipient, everything turned out okay anyway, aye? I totally agree with Susan (I always agree with her anyway, but that's besides the point.) P.S. Hi Abigail!!!!!
Love, Andrea Lena
I say leave it.
Sometimes the meekest of us can be quite frightening without even trying. Yes, Cathy may have even come off to herself as cold blooded, but we all have that within us and you have shown us that side of Cathy more than once. Sometimes the Lioness must be visible to deter the jackals, and sometimes she forgets to sheathe her claws...
Thank you
Leave it as it stands.
As in real life, sometimes you get a little strange in your response.
Hugs, Fran
Hugs, Fran
We can't all be perfect,
and Cathy usually does better. I suspect Jacquie will figure it out, eventually. If she sticks around she'll get to see what kind of persona Cathy is.