Pink World

This whole thing started by accident, I swear.

My mom had taken my twin sister Jessica to an audition, and she wowed them so much they pitched a teen series to star her.

You’d have to be living under a rock not to have heard of it - “Pink World”. It was supposed to be about this single macho dad trying to cope with raising a super girly girl daughter, and everyone was sure that with Jessica as the girl, it would be a big hit.

Then the day before the pilot was to be shot, my sister came down with mono, and things looked bad. A mass panic followed, as everyone realized that a delay of several weeks could cost thousands of dollars, and even tank the show before it ever aired.

Then the show’s producer noticed a picture on the bedside table of my sister’s room, and asked my mom, “Who’s the girl beside Jessica?”

My mom turned a little red, and finally admitted that the girl in the picture was me, her son Jon.

A frantic conference was held, the result of which was I had several people facing me, including the producer, the director and my mom all asking me to take my sister’s place for the pilot and maybe one more episode while she recovered.

That picture hadn’t been the only time I had worn girl clothes, I had often pretended to either be my sister or her girly twin, so it was pretty hard for me to refuse on the grounds of the supposed threat to my masculinity.

So I agreed, we shot the pilot, and it got released, and everybody went crazy for it. It was the most popular premiere of a teen show ever, or so I was told.

So a full season of “Pink World” was approved, and we began filming what was to be my second and last episode before my sister would take over. But before we finished filming, we got the notice that collapsed our house of cards.

My secret had gotten out.

In fact it was plastered everywhere, and “Star of new teen girl show is really a boy” was one of the kinder headlines.

Another frantic conference was held, and a momentous decision was made.

They asked my permission, and made a few changes to the script of the second episode, we shot it, and we waited to see what people would say to the bombshell - the reveal that the girl I was playing was in fact transgender.

We never even dreamed of what the response would be.

People loved this girl even more.

One last conference was held, and they decided that I should keep playing the part, and they got my sister a part on the show as my best friend. She even got a role in a major movie, so she forgave me pretty quickly for “stealing” her part.

So the show went on, and people loved it, and I started getting fan mail from trans kids around the world who wanted to tell me how much they appreciated the fact that the girl I played was someone they could look up to. I also got fan mail from older trans people sharing stories of grief and saying how much they wished they had been blessed with a dad like my TV dad.

Finally, it was time for summer break, and I went to my uncle’s farm in Montana so I could get some boy time, but I found I missed being a girl.

I went to my mom and told her how I felt, and now I am in counseling, trying to figure out just how much of a girl I actually am.

Meanwhile, I have done the second season of “Pink World”, and this summer Mom said if I wanted to I could spend my break as a regular girl to help me figure out where I stand.

So I’m taking a deep breath before I head out into the world as girl - not the girl from the show, but as my feminine self, Joanne.

Wish me luck ...

End