Pure fiction, inspired by two great British Comedians, one of whose characters was the First Gay in the Village. This Queen, however, is anything but gay, unless you count finding out that you’re a lesbian after coming out as a crossdresser! No such village yet exists but, who knows, one day….

Chapter 1 Behind closed doors

Don’t Blame Me I’m A Martian-14

Chapter 14

It’s really, weird having someone stuck in your head like that. I mean I have no idea who they are or even what they are. I mean I can’t tell if he’s a pretty guy and all of that or if she was this really boyish and handsome girl.

Either way it did start occurring to me that I was being not a fair date to Kaylee. It wasn’t like she was saying anything about me being distracted but it was sort of like a vibe coming from her that I was making her feel a bit alone, like my mind was elsewhere…which it was but I just didn’t like the feeling that I thought was going on with her.

I reach over and lace my fingers into hers and smile at her. “Hey, sorry just some random weirdness I guess, I didn’t want to wreck tonight.”

“You didn’t Dylan, hey; I’d have a lot going on too if I was going through what you’ve been.”

Images 34

Chapter 34

I’m groggy when I wake up in the Hospital and my family is all around me. My heads hurting in that headachy way that’s sort of like having low blood sugar. I look at Taylor and he’s got that smile on his face but he’s sort of worried looking too.

“Hey.” I give him a smile and a sleepy murmur.

“Hey back.” He says as he leans over to kiss me.

I love getting kissed like this in bed and with Taylor being all tender and sweet. I’m not a fan of having it happen in a hospital bed again.

“So what’d did I miss?”

Part 6

Bridges 26

Chapter 26

I come out of what was a dead drug induced sleep. You know that sleep where you just know you were out of it entirely. That’s a bit unsettling or it’s always been that way for me and I’m floaty in that body stoned kind of way.

I hear C.C.R.’s Midnight Special dropping away to the sounds of the base radio stations chatter. I’m hurting and thankfully I know where I am and I’m not freaking out. I close my eyes again not sleeping but I don’t know, if you’re military you’ll get this.

Mostly just a filler today.

I awoke this morning, and I felt very good. I became concerned that whoever had been playing with my emotions was at it again. Grandma said no, the amulet was working well. By that time, my good mood was ruined. I have to check with my grandmother to see if I’m happy?

Someone is seriously going to pay.

I walked into the kitchen, and I was almost immediately pounced on by my mother. As she did her best to smother me in a hug, my bad mood disappeared.

Chapter 9

January snow blew hard against the cabin, building a thick blanket over the mountain, covering it in white. Kodiak had left the cabin and was heading to the smokehouse for meat that had been cured late in the fall. It was unmistakable that I was pregnant; there was no way to doubt the fact that our kicking child was growing inside of me.

Kodiak had become quite the caretaker of me. He wouldn't allow me to do anything physical. Though we had been forced to sleep in the same bed, only to stay warm...he never once had done anything to take advantage of our predicament...though, why would it matter now. I waited at the kitchen window for him to return, slowly sipping on my coffee. I too had grown accustomed to the fact that I would be a mother, slowly warming up to the undeniable truth that it would happen whether I liked it or not.

The pain was the first thing I noticed. I was afraid to open my eyes because the light already hurt, even through my eyelids. I had the most incredible headache, kind of like brain freeze multiplied a hundred times. My tongue tasted kind of like I had spent the night mopping the floor with my tongue, and every sound seemed to make my brain pound. I sort of wanted to puke, and I think every part of me was in pain.

This was very hard to write. Been there, done that, but nobody ever found out. At least so far as I know!

Mom, Grandma and I went outside to the backyard, and we walked up to the tree. It was quite large, easily 40 feet tall.

“Okay, now what am I supposed to do with it?” I asked.

“Well, the first thing to do would be to strip the leaves off of it, then remove the branches from the main trunk, stacking them carefully over by the garage for a bonfire Friday night.” Mom said.

“How should I do it? Is there some kind of mental tool I need to use?”

Part 5

I guess I wasn’t feeling so hot when I picked Debbie up at her house, and she quickly picked up on that.

“Are you all right, Em? You seem very...distant, almost upset. Did I piss you off somehow? If so, I apologize, but please talk to me, please?”

“Oh honey, it’s not you. I just got some interesting news last night, and I’m not sure how I want to handle it.”

“Is there anything I can do to help, somehow?”

“I honestly don’t know, Deb. Mom and I were doing some testing to find out where my affinities lay, and, well...”

Chapter 31

Sometime after 4:00 a.m., I heard a soft tapping at my door. I rolled out of the bed and quietly shuffled across the room and pulled the door open. It was the bar maid who had spoken with me, "How serious were you when you said that you'd help me get the necklace?"

I opened the door and ushered her inside, then looked down both directions of the hall to make sure no one saw her enter. "Do you have an idea on how to get it from him?"

She smiled, "I've already started." I glanced at what she was wearing; the silky sleeping gown was very provocative and sexy. "I've finally agreed to allow him to train me in the finer aspects of my sex, so he's supposed to come to my room in half an hour. You can hide out there and bash him over the head once he enters."

Chapter 26

I came inside from the barn, stood at the threshold of the door, and hung my hat. Grandfather was sipping his cup of coffee. The shaft of morning light split the darkness of the interior as I stepped through the doorway. Grandfather looked up at me and winked, at that same moment, Samantha stepped from the bedroom wearing the yellow dress that I bought her some time ago. "I trust you slept well?" he asked her.

She blushed and patted his shoulder as she passed, again he winked at me. "Yes, and I trust that you also slept as well, Grandfather." she replied coyly.

He almost spit out his coffee and began laughing, "Honey, it's been quite a long time since I've slept THAT well!" She shot me a smirk and I smiled back, it wouldn't take one of those big eastern college professors to know what had happened between us last night.

Our resident MegaTomboy won't be happy with this. Sorry, hon.

Debbie looked at me in shock as I walked up to her. “I can die happy now, I’ve seen everything!”

“Ha ha, five thousand comedians out of work, and you’ve gotta be funny.” I smiled and twirled, and my short denim skirt flared out, showing my legs. I had paired it with a white cotton blouse and black ballet flats. “So, whatya think?”