Wuthering Dormice (aka Bike) Part 667 by Angharad

Simon drove us to the school. It was lunch time and the head mistress had suggested we do it quickly and quietly, then take her home to our house. Of course, Trish would have to come home as well, because I couldn’t cope with having to come to get her later. Also, this was like a family crisis, and it required all the members to be present to deal with it.

Mima had been briefed and understood in a limited way what had happened. She burst into tears and it took a little while to calm her down. How Livvie would take it–I had no idea, although I suspected Trish would be quite tearful, not because she would miss the woman, but because her friend would be hurting.

Simon and I followed the headmistress into her office. “I hate moments like this,” she said as she arranged the seats. “As acting parents, I’m happy–no that’s the wrong word, but you know what I mean–for you to break the news.”

’Coward’, is what I thought, but I nodded all the same. Someone had to do it, and it would possibly be better coming from me than the authority figure the headmistress represented.

Livvie had been summoned and she was brought to the office where she knocked and entered. When she saw me there, her face moved from showing fear to mortal terror.

“Headmistress,” she said bobbing a curtsey, “Auntie Cathy, Uncle Simon, have I done something wrong?”

“No sweetheart, but we have some bad news for you.”

“Oh, has Mummy died?”

I nearly fell over. She knew her mother had been involved in an accident of some sort, so it made some logical sense.

“I’m afraid so,” I opened my arms to offer a hug and she slowly came to me.

“Does this mean I have to go and live with Daddy?”

“Not for the moment,” I answered.

“Can I stay with you, Auntie Cathy?”

“For the moment. Do you have any grandparents?”

“Not really, Daddy’s parents divorced when he was little and we don’t even know where they are. They’ve never been to see us.”

“What about Mummy’s parents?” I asked.

“They’re dead.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” I felt myself blush and she walked up to me and allowed me to hug her.

“Please, I’d like to live with you, Auntie Cathy.”

“You can until we sort something out with your daddy.”

“He doesn’t care about me, he’s only seen me twice in the past year. I’d like to stay with you. Trish said you weren’t her real mummy, but she’s allowed to stay with you, so why can’t I?” This was when the tears started, her first then me and then the head mistress. Simon ran out of hankies, and he was moist eyed, too.

“Would you like to come home with us now?” I asked.

“I won’t have to go to bloody Scotland, will I?” she said and I nearly fell over trying not to laugh, which would have been so inappropriate, but being on a knife edge, it’s easy to do the wrong thing.

“No, not unless you want to.”

“I’d like to see the castle that Trish’s gramps owns, but not my daddy’s flat. It’s horrid.”

“We have to get Trish, so we’ll be ready to go in a minute.” I said as the head mistress summoned my foster daughter. She appeared with a worried look on her face as well and when she saw Livvie, she knew that there was a problem with her mummy.

“Trish, Livvie’s mummy has died in an accident, so we’re all going home.”

“Oh sorry, Livvie,” she offered her friend a hug and they both cried together for a moment. I couldn’t avoid the tears myself, it was such a touching embrace–and only little girls could have done it together. Even Simon was sniffing.

We escaped through the playground while the children were being called to start the next lesson. The drive home was pretty well in silence. I sat in the back of the car with a child on either side of me, an arm around each. It was probably the saddest journey I have ever made.

“How did she die–Mummy, I mean?” asked Livvie as we stopped at roadworks.

“I don’t know, sweetheart, I expect we’ll find out in a short time.”

“I don’t want to know. Did Daddy kill her?”

I felt my heart miss a beat, “I don’t know anything, sweetheart.” I lied to this child, and I felt myself get hot and bothered. It was the appropriate thing to do at that moment, she didn’t need to know, and officially, I didn’t know anyway.

Simon put the car radio on, it was two o’clock and we got the news headlines. Most of it was about the Prime Minister surviving an attempted coup by some of his back benchers. Then: ‘Police in Edinburgh, investigating the death of a woman who fell from a third floor balcony, have arrested her estranged husband on suspicion of manslaughter.’

“What’s manslaughter, Auntie Cathy?”

“It’s a criminal charge brought by the police when someone unintentionally kills someone else. Like if we were to knock someone down on the way home, we could be guilty of manslaughter. It’s a form of unlawful killing.”

“So Daddy did kill her, then?”

“I don’t know, sweetheart, I didn’t even know she’d fallen from the balcony. All I knew, was she had died.”

Trish was sniffing, but Livvie stayed quiet, almost in repose. “I wanted to come and live with you before she died.”

“What?” I gasped and Simon swerved.

“I told Trish, I wanted you to be my mummy. She says you love her. Nobody loves me–not my mummy or my daddy. I’m only in the way.”

I hugged her tightly to me, partly because I so wanted her to feel she was loved and partly because I was weeping freely and I didn’t want her to see me. I let go Trish and put two arms around Livvie.

“Sweetheart, we love you, Trish, Mima, Simon and me, we all love you. Grampa Tom, also loves you. I’m sure your mummy loved you too.”

“No she didn’t, she told me I was a ‘bloody’ nuisance often enough, and Daddy didn’t want me, he’s got a girlfriend and she wouldn’t want me. So can I stay with you, will you be my mummy too, like you are with Trish and Meems?”

“She’s not my real mummy, she’s my foster mummy, but she’s wonderful,” said Trish, “I’m sure she could foster you too if you asked her nicely, and we know a judge. He said I could stay with Mummy, didn’t he, Mummy?”

“Yes, darling, he did.” I wondered if she would be subject to Scottish law or English, and if there was any difference. If she really wanted to stay, I’d have to try and help her. I really didn’t need another child to look after. Thank goodness, Stella was available to help, even in a limited sense. It looked increasingly as if my career was on hold until we sorted out Livvie, not entirely what I’d have asked for, but somehow we’d have to cope. Quite how, I hadn’t yet figured out.