Whoring Dinosaurs (aka Bike) Part 607 by Angharad

“Never mind who I am, who are you, that’s Henry’s bed.”

“Not any more, so piss off before I call the nurse.”

“Charmed, I’m sure–still, I’ll see you in theatre,” I offered him.

“What? Who are you?”

“Just your neighbourhood proctologist.” I rushed off before he could respond. I found the nursing sister and confessed my sins.

“Pity I wasn’t there, we only put him in that room because he was annoying everyone else. Oh the baby unit were looking for you, hang on.” She picked through a pile of papers, “Here, I hope it makes sense.”

It did, it gave the time of the appointment with Karen–tomorrow at ten. Well it was better than nine. I’d have to ask Tom to watch Mima again. I suppose I’d better buy him an Easter egg, one made by Glenfiddich or similar, and bottle shaped.

“By the way, where is my future pa in law?” I asked.

“He discharged himself.”

“You mean he walked out by himself?”

“No some chauffer type came and got him.”

“Okay, thanks.” I left sending Henry a text as I walked.

‘Where R U? Will initi8 search party if not heard in 1 hour.
Luv Cathy.’

I was driving into Tesco when I heard my phone beep. I parked and looked at the text.

‘Took ur advice, do come 4 dinner. H’

‘What do I do with ur laundry? C’ I replied.

‘Bring it when u come 2 dinner H.’

‘Not my prob. H’

This was followed by a second a moment later, ‘come 2 lunch & bring em with u. Let me know when. H.’

I decided that was enough for now and went and did the shopping. Cor, the price of good booze is not cheap–still bribery never is. I got one or two other things as well and went home.

Tom had taken the girls home and they’d all fallen asleep on the sofa by the time I got there. I didn’t realise eating pizza was such hard work. I hid Tom’s bottle in the kitchen and started to get the dinner ready, not that they’d need too much, so I thought a quiche with a salad would do.

A sleepy looking Trish came out and hugged my bum–I was standing at the sink at the time. It still made me jump. “You were gone such a long time, Mummy.”

“Yes I know, sweetheart, things took longer than I thought. Anyway, I’ve found a nice new doctor to help you, and we’re going tomorrow morning.”

“Oh,” this was said with disappointment, although hardly unexpected. “Do we have to?”

“Trish Watts, of course we have to. I told you before that we need to show people that your being a girl is your idea, not mine.”

“I don’t care what they think,” she threw back with nonchalance.

“But I do, besides if they got the wrong idea, they could try to take you away from me.”

“Don’t let them do that, Mummy.” I could hear her crying and she was rubbing her face in my hip.

I sat her down at the table and discussed it with her. “Look, sweetheart, we’re going to see Dr Nicholson who’s very nice, I had lunch with her today. She’s a friend of Dr Rose.”

“If she saw you, why do I have to go?” I couldn’t fault the logic, and this child wasn’t in school yet–it was frightening in some ways.

“It’s not me who wants to be a girl, I am one, remember?”

“So am I, Mummy.”

“I know, darling, but to make sure it’s your decision and that you still want to stay one, we have to see someone official, usually a doctor of some sort.”

“That other lady frightened me, she was horrid to you as well.”

“Yes, she was darling, but we won’t see her ever again, the hospital won’t let her go there again. She was very naughty and a policeman took her away.”

“Did he bash her with his stick?”

“His truncheon? I doubt it. By then she’d have calmed down.” But it’s a nice thought, one which I didn’t share with Trish. “But, I promise Dr Nicholson will be nicer than that awful woman and we have to go and see her.”

“Okay, Mummy, will you come with me?”

“Of course I will.”

“Thank you.” She hugged me again, grateful for something I saw as my duty and obligation, but on the other hand, I never turn down a hug.

The other sleeping beauty arrived, probably hearing us talking. “Mummmeeeee,” she shrieked and jumped up on my lap. She hugged me like hybrid between a limpet and an octopus. I almost did a count at one point to make sure she hadn’t grown extra arms. When she’d finished crushing me, she looked at Trish. “Why is Twish cwyin’?”

“I’m not,” answered Trish, “I had something in my eye.”

“Are you alwight, now?”

“Yes, Meems, I am.”

“Well how’s my favourite three year old?” I asked holding onto Mima.

“I’m fine, Mummy.” I wondered who she’d heard saying that, probably me.

“Right, come along youse twose, let’s get tea finished. It’s salad and quiche.”

“What’s kees?” asked Trish.

“Quiche, it’s a French form of bacon and egg flan with some cheese and tomato thrown in for good measure. You’ll like it.”

“I don’t think I like it, Mummy.”

“Oh well don’t have any, you can have a Marmite sandwich instead.”

“I wike it, Mummy,” she said hugging my leg.

“You, Mima, like anything–you’re a bigger dustbin than Kiki.”

“Me not a dussbin, me a wittew girw–naughty, Mummy,” so saying she smacked me on the bum.

“Hoy, you can stop that as quick as you like, it isn’t funny.” With that, Meems burst into tears and for no reason whatsoever, at least none known to me, Trish followed suit.

Just then Tom walked in, “Och I should hae known it, yer mither’s hame, an’ yer baith greetin’.”