Come back soon…Part six

I’m so in this daze but I a good one as mom has me in the chair first and my head leaning over it and into the sink. I’ve never dared going to a salon or a hair dresser it had always been a barber because honestly I didn’t trust my resolve in anything else.

Breaking down crying in one wouldn’t likely be the best thing.

But this is a Cinderella daze.

Like imagine if someone came in with you being poor as dirt and cleaning you up, making you look pretty and sending you off to have the same as all the other girls did.

It’d feel like a spell or magic right?

Masks Chapter 30

*Before…

I take out the box and…Oh em gee.

They’re Riedell’s…They’re Riedell’s Red ribbon ladies figure skates. I open them and they’re new and their white except for the sole/bottom of them which is red leather and red enameled bracing for the blades and they are so pretty.

I start tearing up and then Mom and Aunt Els and Mary Jane and Jen all hold up their skates and stuff and I can’t help it but bounce up and down. “Really!?, really!?”

Mom nods and has the biggest smile and she gestures upstairs. “Go get changed Steph we do have to keep or ice time y’know.”

I Squee! And hug her and grab M.J. and head upstairs at a run. “C’mon I need help!”

*And Now…

Can I have some Brown Sugar for my Damper? Chapter 10.

Chapter 10.

*Before…

“Well I find you sexy in your glasses, I find you sexy in your scrubs when you’re at work, I adore you in those ratty old sweats with the holes in them you wear to do the washing and I find you sexy when your hair’s all messy and you haven’t had a cup of coffee yet.”

Oh dammit he made my jaw tremble…that was…just.

………………………………...

We pull into Sutton’s beach and my heart does this OH….This is one of those times that just drives home to me that I’m in a whole new place…and that it’s a really beautiful place.

*And now…

Come back soon…part five.

It’s so cool what she did.

Mom…and what she shared too it’s likely the most personal mother daughter talk we’ve had. I mean not that we have had that many but still. I can imagine that she’s never really told that many people about the stuff that she had just share with me.

To actually have that for me is a bigger treasure than the things she brought me but I’ll take these things too.

Come back soon…Part four

I cry and I cry and it feels like I won’t stop and I don’t know how to stop because Michael could but Jennifer just can’t.

It hurts too, it hurts like crazy and I should know right? Actually knowing how close I came to hurting my family to really doing some serious damage it’s ripping me up inside. There’s part of me that had been. Fine no one see’s me I’ll show them and there was part of me just so goddamned tired. And like I told mom if it gets to you…gets in deep and you can live through the GID then you sometimes just don’t.

Can Dreams Come True?…Part 8

*Before…

Ryan…

He still feels like a guy, he still act’s and sort of just moves….carries himself like that and holds me like one.

If my heart wasn’t feeling so messed up than I might just be aroused…more than I am…which yeah that means I am a little.

We just lie there together and he turns on one of those fireplace log burning DVD’s.
Being held and no judging and someone that gets it and is still talking to me….

It feels like.

It feels like I’ve been tossed off my boat that was my life and that finally someone has their hand out and holding onto mine and keeping the waves from swamping me and keeping the undertow from dragging me down.

And I can breathe.

*And Now…

Chapter 15

The phone rang in our suite waking both Mom and me.

“Hello,” Mom said.

“Oh my God, have you seen the news?”

It was Gloria, and she was beside herself.

“What news?”

Images 54

Chapter 54

*Before…

It’s just perfect settling in with him and falling asleep with him in our bed right to where there’s this tiny little hand pinching my nose shut and I do the cough waking up bit.
Giselle blinks at me and does the sleepy eyed rub at her eyes with her hand. “Pot.”

I smile and take her hand and slip out of bed even though I was in that dead sleep thing.

I’m her mom…

It’s what we do.

And I love this feeling too…dry mouth and eye crusty gunk and all.

*And Now…