Ballet?!” Debbie looked shocked at what I’d told her, but then she seemed to think again. “You know, that might be a good idea. Ballet will help you in the same way it helps football players. It will help you to feel comfortable with your body and improve your grace and coordination.

“Okay, but...ballet?” I asked.

“You wanted to be more feminine. It’s not just pretty clothes and make-up; there is a whole different feel to your body that you need to understand. Ballet can teach you that.”

“Okay , but...ballet?”

Debbie laughed. “What is your problem with ballet?”

Chapter 31

Sometime after 4:00 a.m., I heard a soft tapping at my door. I rolled out of the bed and quietly shuffled across the room and pulled the door open. It was the bar maid who had spoken with me, "How serious were you when you said that you'd help me get the necklace?"

I opened the door and ushered her inside, then looked down both directions of the hall to make sure no one saw her enter. "Do you have an idea on how to get it from him?"

She smiled, "I've already started." I glanced at what she was wearing; the silky sleeping gown was very provocative and sexy. "I've finally agreed to allow him to train me in the finer aspects of my sex, so he's supposed to come to my room in half an hour. You can hide out there and bash him over the head once he enters."

“I have to say, this is quite a different way of dressing for you.” Mom said, very calmly. “So, I take it that this means things have changed?”

“Yeah, it’s time Emily started to live a real life. I have to face it, Mom; I’m never gonna be ‘me’ again.” I found that I didn’t have any tears left to cry. I was kind of numb, now, and it surprised me that I almost didn’t care anymore.

Mom hugged me, and smiled with wet eyes. She just held me for a long time without saying anything.

I giggled as I raised the spinning mower blade all the way up and put it into forward. In front of me the Gardener laid vainly trying to roll out of the way. He wouldn’t make it. Absolutely amazing the poisons found in ordinary household products.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh!

This chapter describes events after the incident.

Phobia

Ever been scared of something?

Not just a little scared, but turn-white-and-faint, heart-caught-in-your-chest and soil-your-pants scared?

I had something I was that scared of as a kid. Something that made The Monster In The Closet or The Thing Under The Bed minor inconveniences in comparison.

It was a girl.

It was THE GIRL.

Not that SHE looked scary, or creepy, but just the fact SHE existed at all.

Because SHE was inside my head, always after me to let HER out.

The Girl Most Likely To ...
by Barbara Lynn Terry

Part I - Meeting Renée.

It is a weird thing, what we call life. I mean, you go through the motions of existence because the name of the game is survival. But what about those that are just going through the motions and really have no concern for their survival?

I have a very momentous decision to make. Should I go on living the lie I am living now and be what my family and society expects me to be or should I start my life anew and be who I know I really am.

She sat on the steps just upstream of the bridge. Two hours now, as the Ouse roiled and surged round the old stone and debris span in the eddies. Soon, perhaps, the flood markers in the pub downstream would need another notch, and the gardens to her right would be submerged. Winter rains, winter floods, who gave a shit, really? All part of a world she had tried to engage with, that had spurned every attempt she had made to join. The light was fading slowly on a miserably grey and washed out February afternoon, and as it went, so would she. There was only so much strength given to a person, she thought, and when that was gone, so were they.

And yes, I did say Mallory. She was back in school, but she was very subdued.
"It's a new record," she said quietly. "I never been suspended so quick before."
Susan bristled at the ungrammatical statement, but said nothing.
"Two days!" Mallory continued. "It's my new personal best."

It was dark:30 and raining pretty hard and I was, headed home while going around a corner I noticed this person standing along side the road, so I pulled over and asked if they wanted a ride, turns out to be a young lady crying and Really upset. So she got in,while asking her where she was going, so she said East of Johnsburg, So I said I was going that way and would take her home. would of anyway for it was stormy night, not fit for any living thing, besides it was against the code not to help someone in need.

CHAPTER 14
My hair was in disarray, but that was to be expected, as I had slept dreadfully. Serge would not have had the problem, his hair being shorter, but a girl must proclaim her femininity to all the world, and I needed no equivalent of skinned rabbits for my head; a hairpiece, taken from another’s head, no.

LGBT ~an acrostic~
by Barbara Lynn Terry

　
Living life in hope and peace

Giving of our hearts

Being there for others

Tuning out bigotry and hate.

 © 2011 by Barbara Lynn Terry

Monday July 24

Dearest Diary,
So all of a sudden it’s a new week and I’m sooo looking forward to it! Can’t explain why, I’m just so happy! Will write more tonight!

March 29, 2011; 5:45 PM:

“Ten-ninety at Citizens on West Main, ten-forty. Ten-ninety at Citizens on West Main, ten-forty. Ten-ninety at Citizens on West Main, ten-forty.” started blaring over the police radio just as Bill and I turned onto West Main from South Ninth West. We had been on regular patrol for the downtown area since early morning and all had been quiet until now. A “ten-ninety” is police code for a bank alarm, a “ten-forty” means respond quickly. Citizens Bank was the most major bank in town, seated at the corner opposite the courthouse at First and Main.