Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 2024

The Daily Dormouse.
(aka Bike)
Part 2024
by Angharad

Copyright © 2013 Angharad
All Rights Reserved.
  
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Mabel’s wooden walking stick wasn’t going to last very long as a man’s voice joined the cacophony outside. “Mrs Cameron, this Doug Masters, I’m general manager of this hospital, I demand you open the door and come out.”

“I will when I have someone there I can trust and who I believe has sufficient brain power to make talking worthwhile.”

“I can have you arrested, Mrs Cameron.”

“On what grounds.”

“Assault, grievous bodily harm, kidnapping an elderly patient and holding her against her will.”

I glanced at Mabel who sniggered, “Exciting, isn’t it?”

“I could have done without it.”

“Who’s the little girl?”

“Probably Billie, my daughter, she died last year.”

“I’m sorry, oh she’s gone.”

“She tends to do that.”

“This stick isn’t going to last much longer.”

“Try this,” she handed me her metal elbow crutch. I slipped it between the door handles. I wondered how long Simon would take, I hoped he could get Andy Bond.

The banging on the door stopped and I heard voices outside. “Cathy, it’s me, open the door and let the old lady out.”

“What for? This is her room? I’ll come out.”

More discussion. “Okay.”

“My husband is here, we should be able to sort this now.” I withdrew the barriers and opened the door and was immediately grabbed by a policeman. “Hey, what is this?”

“Catherine Cameron, I’m arresting you on a charge of assault, further charges may be preferred. You don’t have to say anything...” I looked at Simon who shrugged and mouthed, ‘Kit’s on his way.’

“But I’m the innocent party here.”

“Get her out of my hospital,” said a man of about forty, who was balding and blushing very red.”

“Get something for your blood pressure or you’re going to have a stroke,” I said to him, but he refused to have any eye contact with me. “Oh well, perhaps they’ll get someone decent when you do.”

I was wrapped in a blanket and led out to a police car in handcuffs. I’ve been here before. The drive to the central police HQ didn’t take very long and I was checked in and then led to a cell. I hope Simon followed behind with my stuff and that Kit wouldn’t be too much longer arriving. At least I was wearing my own pyjamas–a hospital gown would have been too much to bear.

“Cameron, you’ve got a visitor.” The woman PC unlocked the door and let in Kit, my counsel. He gave me a huge hug and said, “Now what have you gone and done?”

“Nuffink guv’nor, I was fitted up, straight up, guv.”

He roared. “So far they’re looking at common assault.”

“Can we counter with threatening behaviour and actual assault.” I explained what had happened including leading everyone to think I was barmy.

“Why did you do that?”

“It was a bit of fun, but it stopped being humorous when blue demon attacked me–honestly, I was just going to the loo. The old lady in the other room next to mine said she pushed her down and caused her to break her hip. I want her out of the hospital and better still, out of nursing.”

“With a broken shoulder she might just be doing that, but on damages from us.”

“But she’s no better than a thug and a bully.”

“I believe you entirely, Cathy, but your word isn’t necessarily enough to satisfy a court of law.”

“Oh dear.”

“What’s the matter?”

“The hospital manager has just had a stroke driving home.”

“How d’you know that?”

“I warned him when I was arrested, he declined to listen to me. His wife will blame me I expect, but it was an accident waiting to happen. Oh well, that’s his game over.”

“You know something else?”

“He died.”

“How d’you know that?”

“I just do.”

“So what is going to happen–do you know the outcome of this?” he pointed to the ground.

“Yes, your cleverness is going to get me off this trumped up charge.”

“My cleverness is rather finite, Cathy, and doesn’t feel very clever at the moment. I can get you bailed but this could drag on for some time.”

“But the silly cow hurt herself, she fell over me trying to hurt me.”

“So you said.”

“I gave her the chance before to stop her nonsense, but she had to try it on. I’ll bet there’s been a whole pile of incidents in wards she’s run.”

“We can try and find out–it might give us something to use against her.”

“I expect they’ll find plenty to use against me–of a violent nature.”

“What dormouse wrestling?”

“You know what I mean–the mafia stuff.”

“You were exonerated of what went public.”

“I live in dread it could all come out again and tabloid go digging–let’s face it, my life would make quite a story.”

“Yeah, I should think at least two thousand installments,” he smirked.

“Just get me out of here and then destroy the opposition.”

“Just like that?” he said waving his arm.

“Yeah, why not, Mr Super-lawyer.”

“I must stop changing in phone boxes, I’m getting too fat.” He pecked me on the cheek and left.

An hour later I was being driven home by Simon, who said very little after, “Don’t start,” when I wanted to know how come I got arrested, not the nasty nurse or her buddies.

Having spoken with all the children and sent them up to bed I was sitting enjoying a cuppa and a biscuit with Stella. I told her what happened and she asked who the ward sister was.

“Gosling–yeah, I’m sure it was.”

“Not Brenda Gosling?”

“We weren’t introduced, she just shouted at me and then went for me.”

“I’d have thought she’d been struck off by now, talk about power crazed. She was a student nurse when I was. She decked a bloke at college who said something she didn’t like. There was also something about an assault on a patient back a few years ago–she was lucky not to get struck off then. No one wanted to work with her because she was such a bully. I’m surprised she got back in here.”

“Could you tell all that to Kit?”

“For a price.”

“If it comes to blows, give her a kick from me–she should have been a storm trooper not a nurse.”

“But of course.”

I went up to bed and Simon and I chatted for a while. I explained that my joke of appearing crazy got out of hand. He chuckled to himself. “I’m not quite as daft as you think, Cathy; I was well aware the concussion had passed but seeing as you wanted to play games I played along too.”

“You what?” I was going to have to watch him in future because he was either brighter than he showed or a better liar–perhaps both. Damn!

“Two can play at games.”

“Yeah, you and Stella: until I met you two I didn’t do any of it.”

“I seem to recall a certain young lady telling me if she hadn’t met Stella and been catapulted out of her comfort zone, she’d still be languishing in a bedsit at the university, not collecting accolades and a criminal record.”

“Don’t joke about it, Simon, it’s doubly vexing because I didn’t actually do anything except get out of her way, it’s hardly my fault she fell over me and broke her shoulder.”

“Quite, now how about a quick shag?” His foreplay was still following the Australian model.

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