Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 2066

The Daily Dormouse.
(aka Bike)
Part 2066
by Angharad

Copyright © 2013 Angharad
All Rights Reserved.
  
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Little Lizzie is so good except that like Cate, she tends to fall asleep on the nipple, presumably because she feels secure. While I was sitting in the kitchen with my boob hanging out and a baby attached to it, Dr Smith rang–he’d arranged for Neal to go to the clinic near Guilford and Simon had sent confirmation of funding the treatment.

Would it work? It didn’t with Stella, she’s still as mad as a hatter–the madness was apparently caused by the use of mercury salts in the felt of the hats. In which case shouldn’t I be crazy too after all the tuna I’ve eaten? Ah, see that explains seeing Billie, it’s all caused by mercury poisoning–glad I’ve got that sorted.

I handed the now somnolent infant to Jacquie who took her off to her cot, while I sorted my clothing slipped in some new bra pads and went off to collect mes enfants. When I got there, St Claires, that is, I was asked to go and see the headmistress. It sounded an ominous summons.

“Ah, Lady Catherine, please take a seat.”

This sounded formal, “Headmistress,” I acknowledged and sat facing her over her desk.

“I am seriously considering suspending Trish.”

My tummy flipped, “Would you tell me why?”

“She is becoming out of control in certain lessons.”

“Oh?”

“In religious instruction she has severally told the sisters teaching her that they’re wrong.”

“And are they?”

“In what way?”

“Does she cite evidence to back up her critique?”

“Does that matter?”

“Of course. If it’s simply opinion it’s worthless except as a subjective commentary...”

“But we’re talking fundamental truths,” protested Sister Maria.

“Absolutely, this is why there has to be repeatable evidence or formulae which can be replicated elsewhere.”

“You can’t do that with the Almighty.”

“Yes, that the weakness with religion isn’t it? It’s absolute truth until you examine it closely and then it sort of disappears.”

“It’s a matter of faith.”

“Perhaps or intellectual laziness.”

“Some of the greatest minds have wrestled with concepts of the godhead.”

“Only because they’d have been persecuted for telling the truth.”

“I can see where Trish gets her arrogance.”

“With the greatest respect, Sister Maria, my arrogance is evidence based yours is simply defensive behaviour built on sand.”

“I prefer to call it faith.”

“Call it what you will, just don’t move too much, it’ll all fall down. If you suspend one of my girls I shall withdraw all three of them.”

“If you do, you will still be liable for their fees until the end of the school year.”

“I’m sure my lawyers will find a way through that, about derogation of responsibility or some such point in law.”

“You were aware we were a religious institution before you brought them here.”

“Yes I was, but I was also aware of it being a place of learning–it now seems to be turning into a place of bigotry.”

“You’ve done so much for us, how can you suddenly turn on us now?”

“You’re threatening my children. Good day, headmistress.” I walked from her study with a heavy heart. At least, now that Trish’s status was female and her body was showing it more and more, it should be easier than it was before to get her into a new school. It was a complication I could do without, as I didn’t really have time to contact schools and arrange interviews. I knew that all three kids were above average intelligence, in the case of two of them well above–so I had very little worries about them meeting academic standards.

I harvested my three and having got them in the car asked what had happened with the religious education class. Trish said nothing. Livvie said it for her. “The nun went on about Adam and Eve and Trish asked about Lilith.”

It was a good job I wasn’t eating or drinking, I’d have choked to death. “What’s that about Lilith?”

“Well she was Adam’s first wife, wasn’t she?” continued Livvie in a matter of fact way.

“According to some traditions; what did the nun have to say?”

“It was nonsense and that Eve was Adam’s only wife.”

“I see,” I said nodding, and I could see Trish saying that about Lilith.

“Then Trish told her the whole Adam and Eve story was simply a myth, as ancient Jews didn’t know about the Big Bang and evolution.”

“That would have gone down like a lead balloon.”

“The nun insisted it was unchallengeable truth because it was in the Bible.”

“Oops, so that’s when you went for the jugular was it, Trish?”

“I told her if Adam and Eve were true then we were all related.”

“That makes sense,” I couldn’t fault her logic.

“I told her that Mr Darwin had suggested we came from the monkeys.”

“Um–not quite, we had the same common ancestor.”

“Yeah well I told her we did and that some of us were more monkey than others.”

“Your usual tactful self, eh Trish?”

“I said it politely,” she sounded indignant.

“What, as in, ‘Please miss you’re a monkey, can I see your tail?” I was minded of a story on the internet from China where some baby had grown a spinal deformity which looked like a tail.

The three of them fell about laughing and even I smirked. “You realise the headmistress is talking about suspending you, Trish?”

“Why?”

“Because you didn’t respect your teacher.”

“But she was wrong, Mummy.”

“She might have been, but you showed her less than the standard of behaviour that she might think she warrants.”

“She’s a fake, Mummy an’ she knows I know it. I bet she only reads up a few days ahead of us.”

“You're still disrespected of her Trish.”

I saw her colour rise and her eyes fill with tears.

“But she was wrong, Mummy,” she protested.

“But there are ways of telling people, Trish, especially old and fragile teachers.”

“Oh it wasn’t the old one, it was Sister Maria.”

My tummy flipped, “Have you apologised?”

“What for, Mummy? She was wrong not Darwin.”

“She might well have been, Trish, but you can’t just call her a liar or an idiot in front of the whole class, it’s embarrassing.”

“That’s what she called me.”

“In front of witnesses?”

“Yes, in front of the whole class.”

“And what happened then?”

“I told her she was wrong and quoted Darwin on earthworms, the Origin of the species by Natural selection and the Voyage of the Beagle, plus some stuff by Wallace. I also quoted some stuff about Lilith from the tenth century BC, but she wasn’t interested.”

“Unless you want her to suspend you, you’d best go and apologise.”

“Do I have to?”

“I’m afraid so.”

“Will you come with me?”

“I will.” I told the others to stay in the car and keep it locked, then Trish and I went to see the headmistress who was just leaving her office. “Trish has something to say to you, headmistress.”

“If it’s more Darwin I don’t wish to hear it.”

“I think you should listen.”

She sighed, “Very well, what is it?”

“I’m sorry I was rude to you, Sister Maria.” Trish then burst into tears and Sister Maria shook her head. A moment later she had Trish in a huge hug which she held her in for perhaps half a minute.

“What are we going to do with you?” she said quietly to Trish.

“I don’t know,” was said quietly back.

“Off you go,” Sister Maria said pushing her back towards me. “I think we might be best allowing you to do something other than religious studies or the whole place will become atheist by end of term.”

“Can you do that?” I asked.

“We can make exceptions, yes.”

“Could you do so for all three of my girls?”

“If you’d care to write and request it, I’m sure we could look favourably upon it.”

“I think I’d best do that then.”

We parted on far friendlier terms than we’d started, and part of it was Trish crying as she apologised, it reminded the headmistress that under the huge intellect hid an eight year old girl.

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