“The parody is the last refuge of the frustrated writer. Parodies are what you write when you are associate editor of the Harvard Lampoon. The greater the work of literature, the easier the parody. The step up from writing parodies is writing on the wall above urinals.” - Ernest Hemmingway.

“Turnabout is fair play.” — Angela Rasch

The following parody has many references to Cary Grant and his movies. . .above and beyond the obvious. Should you get bored with this story, or if the story runs against your grain. . .use it as a puzzle. . .try to pick out all those references.

This story also contains several un-attributed quotes. We apologize for trying to be someone or something we’re not. We suspect the nature of the story supports this decision.

“How’s the fit?” the shop clerk asks me as I smooth the long, flowing dress over my narrow waist and smooth, curved hips.

“Be honest, Laura,” mum advises. “If there are any problems, you need to let us know now as there won’t be another chance before Saturday, and you’ll be in that dress for a long-“

“I know, I know,” I interrupt. “It’s still pinching a bit around my armpits…”

“Okay, we can do something about that,” the clerk says. “Are there any other places it’s too tight?”

“Nope,” I reply, smirking as I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror.

It was literally a slap heard round the kingdom. Reginald's family did not look happy and neither did the King and Queen. They saw their potential new tourist attraction going up in flames due to their hot-headed replacement daughter.

Duty Demands
A Short Story
By Maryanne Peters

Family Jewels
By Ellie Dauber (c) 2007

Here's a gargoyle inspired by the recent release of files from the Central Intelligence Agency. I hope you enjoy it.

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