(aka Bike) Part 1843 by Angharad Copyright © 2012 Angharad
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I’d been home perhaps ten minutes when a car entered the drive and out stepped Inspector Marple. I saw him swagger to the door and ring the bell.
“Are you home, Mummy?” asked Jacquie
“Yes, could you ask Stella if she could collect the girls if I’m delayed by this,” I indicated the door.
“I’ll go and see her as soon as let Mr Plod in.”
“Is it that obvious?”
“Look at the size of his feet,” she said snorting and went to answer the door.
I heard voices at the door and a moment after Jacquie led the big footed inspector down the hallway to meet me.
“Lady Cameron, I’d like to ask you some questions.”
“Thank you, Jacquie, we’ll go to my study, Inspector.” He followed on behind me and I led him to the sitting area of the study.
I caught sight of him looking round the room, “Very nice, what you can do with money, eh?”
“I need somewhere to prepare lessons, write up research and study.”
“How many books you got in here?” he made a sweeping gesture across the room.
“Three thousand give or take a few.”
“You read ’em all?”
“Bits of, there’s another two hundred journals over there, and that bottom shelf is the stuff, I’ve published.”
He nodded an acknowledgement. “You keep pretty busy then?”
“Much of the time, yes. I have seven children plus others to take care of.”
“Oh I know about all your kids, an’ how you got ’em, sweet talkin’ judges an’ so on.”
“I did nothing illegal nor immoral, I gave shelter to children who needed a loving household.”
“Turning boys into girls, isn’t it?”
“I beg your pardon?” I felt my anger rising like a polaris missile.
“Three of your so called daughters started off in life as boys–one, I’d have put down to unfortunate, two to coincidence, three–what kind of person are you?”
“And what was I supposed to do, each of them asked me to help them achieve who they wanted to be.”
“There was a fourth wasn’t there? What happened there? Too many hormones was it?”
“Billie died from a brain haemorrhage, and if I hear you say one thing against her memory, so help me...”
“You’ll what? Kill me like Edith Howse?”
“Why should I kill Edith Howse?”
“She didn’t want to talk, megalomaniacs like you don’t like that, do you? And besides she was already a woman. So you turned her into a bonfire.”
“I went to see her, on your suggestion, if you recall. I got my husband to agree to consider loaning her some money to pay off the usurer. She wouldn’t let me talk to her. I went off to think how I might get her to believe who I said I was. I went back to try again and discovered the fire brigade and ambulance were there. I felt sick.”
“Why? What’s she to you?”
“She was someone who was in the grip of some parasite, who I felt I could free from it. But she wouldn’t listen, she was too frightened.”
“Aw didums, so little miss moneybags couldn’t go to the ball, after all.”
“You patronising twat, how dare you?”
“I don’t believe you, I believe you went back with an incendiary device to teach her a lesson.”
“I teach at a university, Inspector. I don’t teach those sorts of lessons, I teach ecology, the conservation of systems not the extinction of life. Unlike you I don’t go around throwing my weight about. I like to try and help people when I can.”
“Sure you do, well you can help me, I’m arresting you for the murder of Edith Howse, you don’t have to say anything but anything...” I heard his voice drone on and on with the caution. My mind went onto auto pilot.
“Let’s go,” he said grabbing my arm and leading me back to the hall where Jacqui and Stella appeared.
“I have to go down to the police station, please call Si and let him know.” Stella nodded knowing that meant call a lawyer or get Si to do it. “Could you let James know, too–his number is my address book?” She nodded again.
I was bundled into the car and we were driven off by another police officer who must have stayed in the car.
“You’re making a big mistake, Inspector.”
“Am I now? What you gonna do, set fire to me as well?”
It was a tempting thought, “No, I shall ask to call my lawyer.”
“You can call your lawyer, but he won’t get you off this one, you were seen at the house.”
“Two hours before the fire.”
“Yeah, but you went back.”
“After the fire had started.”
“No, you started the fire, what with, petrol?”
“Petrol?”
“Yeah, you know as an accelerant.”
“I know what petrol is. I’m still outraged that you would consider me as using it to start a fire.”
“Don’t tell me, there were no boy scouts around to rub together or turn into girl guides.”
“Your jokes are sick as your logic, Inspector. How you’ve got to this level is astonishing, your psychotic personality should have been screened out long before.”
“Psychotic? I ain’t the one who thinks he’s the other sex, or wants to swap other people’s.”
“Oh we’re back to that, are we? You realise it’s illegal to show prejudice, Inspector?”
“I’m not showing prejudice, I’m calling a spade a spade.”
“My legal status is female.”
“Your legal status is under arrest for a nasty murder.”
“And yours is on very thin ice.”
“Just ’cos your so called husband is rich and powerful, don’t mean he can lean on the police to get you off. Or hire a smart lawyer to do it for him. I suppose he’s really queer to marry you, isn’t he?”
“That remark has just cost you your job.”
“Making threats to an officer of the law, that’s an offence.”
“So is slandering someone whose boots you aren’t worthy to clean.”
“Just because he’s rich enough to pay to have your body altered so he can shag it every night, up the arse you like it best I expect, don’t mean he’s nice.”
“You have the mouth of a sewer and the brain of Rattus norvegicus.”
“Oh what a gift a little education is, taught you to pretend to act like a woman did they?”
“What are you talking about?”
“All the airs and graces you put on and the feminine walk–all false, just like your chest.” He poked me in the breast and some milk squirted out and hit him in the eye. I nearly wet myself.
“If that’s silicone,” I’ll kill you,” he muttered.
“It’s milk you stupid little man, I have a nursing baby.”
“How can you nurse a baby?”
“The same as any other woman, how d’you think, or have you never met a real woman except to arrest them and make slanderous insinuations. I can see why you’re not married, unless it was to your left hand.”
“Very funny,” I saw him blush and I suspected he was getting very angry. Suddenly a name came to my mind.
“Lorna Teague turned you down for a date when you were fifteen, didn’t she? Oh dear you haven’t had the bottle to ask anyone ever since.”
He glared at me, “How d’you know about Lorna?”
“Your mother still washes your socks by hand does she? More fool her, mind you, being a mummy’s boy means you can spend all that money on pornography–does she know about the pictures on your computer?”
“How d’you know about...you’ve been spying on me, haven’t you?”
“I know enough to get you investigated by the Police Complaints Authority.”
“You got no proof.”
“I have more proof than you have about me setting fire to that house.”
“Yeah, well we’ll see about that, won’t we?”
“Undoubtedly, I hope you’ve written your letter of resignation and declared yourself bankrupt.”
“You don’t scare me.”
“I should hope not, but I can guarantee my barrister will.”
Comments
I suppose there's one ...
in every force. Yeah, we've all met 'em. By and large in the last five years or so, I find the plod have come a hell of a long way. However, even the best run and best educated force is bound to have the odd neanderthal knocking around lurking under the stones (or wherever). These individuals can get quite tiresome at times but by and large the British Police are okay with LGBT these days.
So Cathy's been arrested, short of planting evidence on her and at the scene, Inspector Marple is going to have his work cut out getting a conviction.
Nice chapter Ang but truly, there are not many cops in the UK these days with that sort of attitude.
Still lovin' it by the the way.
X
Bev.
Never mind...
...the car probably has a tracker on it, so it can be proved Cathy and James were nowhere near the scene at the time the fire started. Add to that eyewitness statements of the day's events and a lack of petroleum residue on Cathy's hands and his accusation wears even thinner. He seems the type to try and libel Cathy once her arrest has been quashed, which would push him into even more financial trouble.
Never mind that, as with most of the Portsmouth Constabulary, he probably (a) banks with High Street, (b) has a rather large loan or mortgage with them...
As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!
Bigfooted Inspector Marple's especially on thin ice, since
in yesterday's episode there was thus:
"I left James in the car and ran down the street, some woman was telling a copper, “Two men came up and pushed something through her door, minutes later there was smoke and flames everywhere.†I made a discreet retreat and went back to the car."
So there was evidence given to the police that it could not have been Cathy who started the fire AND that it was not started with Petrol, though he could argue petrol was poured in first before the something that started the fire. But there is no way that Cathy could be two men.
It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice.
Holly
I wonder...
Was Inspector Marple one of the two men who first poured the petrol and then slide in the incendiary? Is that toooo convoluted?
Annette
And, he hasn't got much of a chance of establishing a motive
Why would Cathy be trying to hurt, even less, kill, someone she risked her life to protect?
******************
At least there was another officer in the car during most of the by play between Cathy and Marple.
*****************
Of course if he is involved with Cortez, might the other officer be an imposter? Horrors!!
It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice.
Holly
Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 1843
Mr Marple Plod must be in the pay of that goon.
May Your Light Forever Shine
You've made a big mistake, constable.
You've made a big mistake, constable.
I am an inspector.
Not for long, I think.
Lets just hope he doesn't decide to go beyond his authority
and decide getting a little physical will get to the "truth" quicker. Wish the conversation was being recorded (by Cathy).
Does bring up the point, police are like vampires, you NEVER invite them in and unless they have a warrant or reason to believe a crime is being committed they can't invite themselves in. (at least in the US)
In an episode or three,
when Cahty's been released, let Trish have a little bit of fun looking into this guy's computer. I'd bet it'd take her about 90 seconds to find something illegal and have "the Inspector" email it somewhere incriminating.
Or would that be too nice for him?
Cathy really...
Cathy really shouldn't have talked to the inspector alone... Specially not without her lawyer present. Sounds like things will get VERY MESSY soon...
As to timing - there's a better than even chance that Cathy (& James) can prove they were not at the house when the fire was set, as the fire department tends to keep very good records on when they get called - and they were already there when Cathy and James got back. I suspect their car shows up in quite a few traffic and other cameras - many if not most having clocks... (Hey, maybe James ran a red light at the time the fire started - on the other side of town... That'd be mud.)
Wonder what the penalty for intentional false arrest is in the UK?
Why should Cathy not have talked to Inspector Marple alone - she has no proof he made the comments he did about her and the kids and the other inflammatory remarks. Would have been MUCH easier to get him in trouble then...
Things be very messy... You'd think the Chief Inspector would know to keep his people in line by know... *sighs*
Thanks,
Annette
DO NOT GO WITH HIM.
This is not a real arrest if it was he would have a copper in uniform with him especially for such a high profile arrest. This guy is either on the loan sharks pay roll, or working for some other persons like the Russian mafia. This is a slick hit at worst, just a little maybe he is just 100 short of a gross of brain cells at best, Still dead is dead.
With those with open eyes the world reads like a book
hadn't thought about that angle
Hmmm.....
Inspector Marple one of the enforcers
So, he knew all about the accelerant, and the method. Perhaps he did the deed himself, working for the loan shark?
Gwendolyn
So any scenarios, so little time
Good this she asked Stella to make a call or two, including one to James. Next few episodes should be interesting.
Don't let someone else talk you out of your dreams. How can we have dreams come true, if we have no dreams?
Katrina Gayle "Stormy" Storm
whoops
she should not have mentioned the computer. Now he'll have time to clean it up. He sure has developed a nasty mouth, all of a sudden. Maybe he's trying to piss her off in hopes of a confession, but he sure picked the wrong way. Shame no one saw him touching her. That would lead to definite charges, especially if she is cuffed. And if her hands are free, I hope she was sharp enough to turn on the recorder in her phone.
Mmmmm....
Something about this policeman does not add up, As Misha has pointed out something just dos not ring true about our so called policeman, For his own protection he should have had a policeman with him whilst making the arrest, And given Cathy is female should the officer not have been woman PC ?
If we accept then that Marple is up to some sort of mischief, It does beg the question just who he might be involved with... The obvious answer would be Mr Cortez, If that happens to be the case then i guess Cathy may come to view it as a time saving exercise Two bad guys in one go...
That is unless something goes wrong...
Time for some serious nail biting i guess...
Kirri