Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 1841

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The Daily Dormouse.
(aka Bike)
Part 1841
by Angharad

Copyright © 2012 Angharad
All Rights Reserved.
  
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I talked over what had happened with Jacqui, David and Stella. They all thought I had grounds for a complaint against Inspector Marple, however, as it wasn’t a recorded interview, it would be my word against his. I did, however, call our solicitor and relate the incident to him and he made notes and advised to call him immediately if it went any further. He cautioned me not to say anything further to police without a legal rep being present. I did mention complaining and he told me I would be wasting my time.

I looked up the website of the local paper and found out the name of the woman concerned.

Local women see off thugs in car park.’ was the lurid headline. It continued in equally deplorable fashion.

Portsmouth widow, Edith Howse (47) was attacked by two thugs in the car park at Gun Wharf Quay, according to police. While several shoppers walked past oblivious to her plight, a lone woman shopper came to her aid and in the manner of a martial arts expert, she subdued both attackers, one of whom was armed with a knife. In the subsequent fracas, one of the attackers stabbed the other by mistake before being subdued by the woman and subsequently arrested by police when the original victim escaped and summoned help.

Inspector John Marple of Portsmouth CID, while commending the rescuer on her courage suggested that it isn’t a good idea to intervene, especially when the attackers are probably armed. Police are respecting the anonymity of the rescuer who has made a statement.’

Once I’d printed off a copy of the article, I contacted James and asked him to find out details of this woman. I wanted to go and see her, first, to find out if she was okay and second, to offer her financial assistance. I also wanted to learn who the loan shark was and perhaps ask him to leave her alone–taking Jim with me of course.

He was quiet at the moment, though apparently he’d been working for two members of parliament–one was investigating the other surreptitiously–believing he was having an affair with his wife.

“Was he?” I asked.

“Was he what?”

“Having an affair?”

“Oh yeah, but not with the other guy’s wife.”

“So she was innocent after all–just paranoia?”

“Not quite, she was screwing the minister of the department he worked for as a deputy, junior undersecretary or something equally ludicrous.”

“What did he do, make the tea and buy the biscuits?”

“Something like that–I think he held the budget for pencils and parking.”

“Does it cost to park a pencil, then?”

“Obviously it does in Westminster.”

“I wonder if they tow them away if you leave them carelessly on your desk?”

“Being slightly familiar with the idiocies of Westminster, it wouldn’t surprise me.”

“Idiocies or idiots?” I asked for clarification.

“A bit of both. Of course in the upper house, they have the privilege of being congenital idiots as opposed to aspiring ones in the Commons.”

“I’ve just realised how it works. You work in the Commons until your dementia is noticeable and then they send you off to the home for confused politicians now called the Lords.”

“You could well be right,” he chuckled. I gave him the link to the article and asked him to trace her for me and then to come down so we could visit her together.

I sat and ate my lunch with an appetite which felt greatly reduced. It would probably do me good if that state lasted for a few weeks, but I knew it wouldn’t, so I wouldn’t lose any weight. I know, we women are obsessed with being overweight and all want to lose some without any pain or effort. Sadly, only an illness tends to do that or some horrible pills which cause you to have diarrhoea.

“That copper upset you, didn’t he?” observed Stella.

“What d’you mean?” I asked defensively.

“It’s put you off your tuna salad. Got to be serious to do that.”

“Okay, so he got to me. I plan on dealing with it.”

“You’re not going to do anything daft are you?”

“Like what?”

“Like try to get your own back.”

“No, I have some plans but none of them involve the police.”

“Care to share,” she badgered me.

“Not at the moment.”

“Suit yourself.” She went off in a huff while I waited for James’ call. It happened about an hour later, while I was trying to feed Catherine. He’d found the person concerned and we agreed to go and see her the next day. He’d also put out some feelers about loan sharks in the area: there were at least three–it’s a naval town, and some of the families of servicemen aren’t the best at controlling their finances, despite the navy offering help with advice and all sorts of social/family care workers.

The rest of the day dragged on and I eventually got to bed waiting for the chance to do something useful tomorrow.

“Si?” I said lying with him spooned around me.

“Yes, babes,” he gently stroked my leg.

“You know that woman I helped?”

“What about her?”

“I told you she was being pestered by a loan shark.”

“Yeah.”

“If I acted as her guarantor would you give her a loan to pay him off?”

“What?”

“Didn’t you hear me?”

“I heard you loud and clear.”

“So?”

“So what?” he obfuscated.

“Would you give her a loan?”

“She sounds high risk, so probably not.”

“Even if I acted as guarantor.”

“What if she defaults?”

“I guess I get to cough up.”

“Why should you help her?”

“Because she’s one of many who can’t get credit and thus fall prey to these creeps who once they get their claws in them won’t let them go.”

“She can’t get credit because she can’t guarantee to pay it back.”

“That’s why I want to help her.”

He rolled onto his back and rolled over to face him. “Why have you got this compulsion to make everything right?”

“I haven’t, but I felt she and I worked to deal with the thugs and so I’d like to work with her again.”

“All she did was run off and call the cops.”

“She could have just run off and left me to them.”

“My money would be on you,” he said looking me directly in the eye.

“Yeah, well I want you to put your money on her.”

“And if I don’t?”

“I’ll make her a personal loan.”

“She could be in hock by thousands.”

“So?”

“These guys are real crooks, they charge huge rates of interest and it quickly totals up to thousands.”

“I know, that’s why I want to help her escape their clutches.”

“I don’t know, babes, it goes against all the principles of banking–we’re a business not a charity.”

“Yet you are a very charitable and generous man,” I kissed his nipple to emphasise my point.

“Only to you and the kids.”

“Just this once–pretty please?”

“I’ll see, get her to come into the local branch and I’ll ask the manager to see what he can do.”

“Si, you are simply wonderful.”

“If my father finds out he’ll hang me from the yard arm after flaying me alive.”

“No he won’t.”

“He will.”

“I won’t let him.”

“You and who else's army?”

“Just me, you Camerons are pussy cats when faced by a real tiger,” I did my best attempt at a tiger roar to prove my point.

“Miaow,” he replied then grabbing me by the bum...you don’t need to know that do you?

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