CHAPTER 35
We went round to the High Street again, not far from the shop, and found some seats in one of those plastic establishments that children love so much.

Andy rang his brother to let him know where they were, and then we settled down to some unhealthiness. Jim was obviously feeling ten feet tall as he led two of his grandparents through the menu, as it wasn’t the sort of place they knew. The three boys seemed to be bonding quickly in that odd way children have, especially when, like Jim, they have spent days in purely adult company. That left us freer to talk.

We had had a plan, and an assumed obstacle, and that had turned right round on day one. Now we had Andy, and this may sound stupid, but I was almost feeling the urge to go and find him some bloody Earth-mother type to get him fat and happy. Almost. I kept reminding myself that the only reason he had been saved from that vicious little cow was that he was a lazy bastard, one who still left the rest of us to pick up after him.

Now, her. As a woman, I get more than enough shit in this world. As a transsexual woman, I got even more. But…every single lying bitch like her fuels the idea that all women are liars, that every accusation of rape is a lie, and ‘no’ really means ’yes’ and….enough. Joe, and Julie, two sides of the same shitty, selfish coin. Perhaps they could be introduced….

No. Christmas, children, family, warmth and love, not that scab that I still picked at whenever I got angry. I looked across at three little boys comparing presents, and knew who the winners in this life are. Mam and Dad were picking at their burgers, trying to work out what was in them, and Elaine and Siá¢n were staring at the Monsoon shop across the way.

“Back in a minute, Sar”

“Yes, I’m sure of it, Siá¢n, but I know you. Should I leave the door on the latch tonight?”

She likes her floaty dresses, does our Siá¢n, Andy asked, quietly,

“Remember what I said about that scrip? Do I assume you’re filling it for Alice, then?”

Shit. “Do you really think I can answer that one, Andy? MYOB”

“OK, then. Now, with all due respect for patient confidence, and so on, do we have a plan for Alice? I owe her more than enough, you know that, so ask if you need anything”

“How do you see the staff taking it, Andy?”

“Well, the floor staff don’t matter, do they, so it’s just the five of us involved, before you say ‘no shit, Sherlock’ “

“And?”

“It’s Anne ,isn’t it? She’s got some big God stick up her arse”

“So you were listening. I thought you’d gone out”

“No, Sar, ever since you know who I try and keep an ear open when women get talking together”

“Just for your own safety, is it?”

“Well, no, not exactly” He grinned, and the familiar Andy was back. “Seriously, Sar, Suzy seems cool”

“So…just a wild thought, Andy, but do you know if Anne is seeing anyone at the moment?”

“To be honest, I don’t know. One thing I will say…oh ,sod it, here’s a lecture. I am a bloke. Perfume is for girlies. A little squirt of the sniffy stuff is fine, but when someone bathes in it , and leaves a scent trail behind them, it’s a bit much. Every so often, she’s like that. And that’s the same days she does the brickwork. You know, plasters on the warpaint”

“Yeah, that’s what we noticed at the carol service. All paint and perfume”

“You went to her carol service?”

“Yes, we took Alice. No, Andy, she was in drag”

There was a microsecond where he had to process that statement.

“OK. Look, Sarah, is she living with you?”

“About half the week”

“She looks…I dunno, content?”

“That’s Enid. She made a real impact on her”

“I can see.”

I took a plunge. “Andy, I have to go into hospital n a few weeks, for those problems I mentioned. I need someone to watch Alice’s back. As she gets more used to being herself, she gets careless. I need, she needs, someone to watch her back. Can you do that for me?”

“No.”

“What?”

“You heard me. I will do it for her, though”

“You teasing fucker”

Big grin, that almost let me see why the girls fell for him. “Seriously, Sar, I owe her more than I can ever pay back, so no biggy.”

He looked thoughtful. “Just thinking, Sarah, but who else knows? It’s just the old story about the relationship between the life of a secret and the number of people who know”

“Margaret knows”

“Margaret who?”

“Margaret Price-Thomas”

“Fucking hell, you are on first name terms with HER?”

“Yes, I am” I couldn’t resist it, “and she knows you too”

“Oh shit….what does she say about me?”

“That you are a shagger”

“Shit”

Another grin. “She knows me well, then”

“Andy, what are we going to do about you?”

“I really don’t know, love. Look, let’s just sort out our new girl first, OK?”

He sat for a few seconds in thought. “Right, two things. I think we need Suzy on side, and I think we need to see what is up Anne’s arse. You talk to Alice about Suze, and I will see what my contacts know about madam. There will be something they can find, I am sure”

“Thanks Andy. I mean that, she needs all the friends she can get. You have seen how much I have been researching this and all I can say is that this s the hardest part. You come out, and people make impulse decisions to hate you, tolerate you or accept you, and there is no going back. You can’t say ‘I was only joking’ if it turns to rat shit”

“She isn’t going to back down, is she?”

“Andy…do or die, that’s where she is”

“Oh, fuck, Sar, this is a shitty world, isn’t it?”

I looked across at the boys. “No, not always, Andy”

He caught my glance. “No, perhaps not”

Alice came over with Enid. “My ears are burning”

“So they should” I said, ”Andy was just commenting. ‘Those shoes, with that dress’ and suggesting a revamp to the make up”

“Alice, she is as usual talking out of her admittedly gorgeous arse. Now, we seem to have come to a sort of agreement. I watch your arse, in a manner of speaking, and you don’t do anything stupid or impulsive without talking to somebody. Sound like a deal?”

Alice hugged him, and kissed his cheek. “Alice, sweety, can I make a serious suggestion? The stubble ain’t working for me”

She looked crestfallen. Andy took her hand, and at that I really felt for him. “We need to do more than sort your clothes out, though Enid here has done a magic job. You need to start looking at things like permanent beard removal and perhaps waxing. Now, I might know someone who can help you there….”

I couldn’t help it. I started to laugh. “Would this person by any chance be someone you shag, Andy?”

“Might be! Look, this is where we need all we can get. We are all in this together, agreed?”

There was a general chorus of approval. I realised Tony had come up, leaving the boys to be boys together.

“Andy, you don’t match what this horrible pair have said about you. Do you fancy, at any time, coming round for a meal or just a drink? Jim would be glad to see you, especially if the boys come along.”

Bless you, my sweet honey bear.