As we walked, I said, “You know. I think I just want to enjoy the fire and the singers tonight. It’s like everything is as it should be.”

“So no sitting by the fire tonight?”, Amy asked.

“No. I think tonight we’ll just enjoy it. And talk with the other guests.”

“They’ll like that.”, my aunt said.

As we walked past where we usually sit to meditate, I saw a large group of guests over where the singers were. Then I saw Naainish. Then I saw that both Chief Todachine and Chief Kinlicheeny were also here.

My aunt, uncle, and grandmother went to talk with the guests, and Amy and I walked over to where the Chiefs and Naainish were. As we walked up to the three of them they almost in unison said, “Yá’át’ééh alní'íní, Kai and Ajie.”

Amy and I just said, “Yá’át’ééh alní'íní.”

And I added, “It’s good to see all of you.”

“It’s good to see you too.”, Chief Kinlicheeny said. “We knew you were going home soon, so we wanted to see you one last time. And say goodbye.”

I saw Amy smile as she said, “Chief Kinlicheeny. Kai and I never say goodbye. It’s too permanent. We only say so long.”

“I see. So in saying, so long. You’re saying until we meet again. We would say hágoónee' which roughly translated means, see you later.”

“That’s good to know, Chief.” Then Amy went on to tell them the short version of why we never say goodbye.

When Amy finished, I saw Naainish smile. And Chief Kinlicheeny looked at her, then at me, and said,”It’s amazing that two young people separated for four years, get back together, and still feel as you two did.”

“Chief.”, I said. “I think the day that Amy moved away is when we both knew that we were meant for each other.”

He just nodded yes.

Then I said, “I know that you will see us again. Both of us love this area, and it’s people.”

“Is that a promise?”, Chief Todachine asked.

Amy and I both looked at him, and said, “Yes.”

He just smiled.

Then I said, “Naainish. Could we speak to you for a minute.”

The three of us walked to a quiet place, and I said, “Naainish. When we were in Taos, we met a lady who figured out who I was. And she told me that I’m a healer. Am I?”

“Kai.”, Naainish said. “Some people who see a two spirit person see someone that they think can bring them luck or heal them. I know that when you were here earlier this summer that your grandmother, and even Chief Todachine, felt that you helped them heal. Maybe you did, and maybe you didn’t.

“I think that you, your mother, and Ajie just being here helped your grandmother. She’s a strong woman. And just seeing you helped her. But you did bring her spiritual strength.

“And with Chief Todachine, I believe that seeing your grandmother get better helped him. And he may have believed that you had healing powers. And sometimes in just believing that you will get better, you do.

“Are you a healer? You are not a medicine man or a hand trembler. So, I’d say, in the Navajo way, that you are not. But in being the loving granddaughters that you and Ajie are. Yes, you are.”

“Hand trembler?”, Amy asked.

“A hand trembler. They use divine powers, to verify an illness. One way they do this is while holding a trembling arm over the person they trace symbols in the earth with their other hand that helps them identify the illness. So the name hand trembler.”

“Interesting.”

“Then why does everyone say that I’m special?”, I asked.

“It’s because of who you are. As you know a person with two spirits is special to our people.”

“So what am I?”

“You are not a what. You are you. You may not be a healer. But there is something that you bring. You may not know what it is. But someday you may know.”

“Thanks, Naainish. I was worried that there was something else that I had to try to understand when I don’t fully understand the two spirit thing yet.”

“I know, Kai. You’ve been handed many things in the past couple of years and especially in the last couple of months. And like I told you that first week you were here, I’m still learning about being a half-man half-woman person. I’ve learned from you. And you will learn from others.

“Never assume that you know everything.”

“I know that Naainish. I’ve always been open-minded. And I realize that life is a learning experience from the day you’re born until the day you die.”

Naainish just looked at me. And Amy said, “Naainish. When he was growing up, everyone considered Tommy as the most curious person we knew. Tommy was always trying to figure out how something works or why something happened. He was always reading and still reads a lot. And I see this curiosity in Kai too.”

“Kai.”, Naainish said. “I’m not surprised. I could sense that you are a very complicated person, as are most Nádleeh. And the longer that I know you, the more I want to know about you.”

Without saying anything else, the three of us walked back over to where the singers were. About fifty guests were sitting and standing listening to them. As we stood there some of the guests would walk over to us and talk, some were interested in what we were wearing. Others had watched me sit and meditate at the fire, and they asked about that.

We stayed at the bonfire until it started to die down, and Amy and I were among the last ones there. We stood there and watched the last of the flames die out. And like it does in the high desert after sunset, the air temperature started to drop. And once the heat from the fire was gone, it got cooler. Amy cuddled closer to me, and I put my arm around her.

We stood there for a few minutes, then Amy whispered, “You know that tomorrow will be our last Bonfire?”

“I know.”, I replied. “And I think I’m going all out for it.”

“Biil dress and all?”

“Yeah. I feel I need to say so long.”

“You know I’m really going to miss all of this.”

“Me too. But you know, they have hospitals out here too.”

“What do you mean?”

“Maybe after we graduate, we could move out here.”

“What?

“You heard me.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

“You're serious?”

“Yes. We both love it out here. Don’t we?”

“You know we do. Think we should talk to our parents about it?”

“Of course.”

“But I was thinking of working on my master’s degree after I found a job.”

“I know. Doesn’t the university out here have a school of nursing?”

“With the hospital that grandma was in being the university’s hospital, I think they would.”

“We could run down to Albuquerque tomorrow after we stop at Mrs. Benallie’s.”

“But, grandma and Aunt Ruth are coming with us.”

“That’s right. I wonder if they’d mind if we went by ourselves?”

“We can only ask.”

Just before we headed back to our room, I walked over to the edge of the fire pit, stooped down, and picked up a partially burned stick. When I stood and turned around, Amy gave me a questing look. I said, “Don’t ask me why. I just felt that I needed to take a stick from this fire.”

Amy smiled, and said, “I know to never question anything that you do like this.”

“I know. I just feel the spirit of the fire in this piece of wood.”

“I thought it was something like that. Just like the wood from the tree on the cliff.”

“Yeah.”

* * * * * *

Tuesday morning Amy and I stopped at Mrs. Benallie’s shop for a little while, and she was happy to see us. Amy picked up two more cute long skirts and another blouse. We also told Mrs. Benallie about meeting Sike Yazzie, and she told us that she knew. That Sike had stopped in, and they had talked about us, and that they had a good laugh over how I’d handle the collector.

While we were still at Mrs. Benallie’s shop, Amy changed into the new long skirt and the blouse that she had bought. And I asked her, “Why the change of clothes?”

“It’s comfortable.”, she replied. “Besides I like the look. And should have worn one of my other skirts and blouses to start with like you did.”

“We should have brought your new belt.”

“I’ll have plenty of time to wear it.”

We stopped at another store that carried luggage and picked up an additional suitcase. With all the things we’d purchased and been given, we needed it. We'd had three suitcases and a carry on coming out, and now we'd have four suitcases and a carry on going home.

Amy and I then drove to Albuquerque and the University of New Mexico’s School of Nursing. As we walked into the Nursing School, we stopped at the reception desk, and the girl asked how she could help us. Amy explained what she was looking for and the girl made a phone call, then she had us take a seat.

A few minutes later a woman came out, stopped at the desk, and the girl pointed at us. The woman walked over, we stood, and she introduced herself as Mrs. Etsitty. Amy introduced us as Amy Young and Kai Nez.

Mrs. Etsitty then took us back to her office and asked Amy what she could do for her. Amy told her that she had just finished her Sophomore year in nursing and then earlier this summer she had completed her first clinicals. Amy went on telling her that she was thinking of moving out here after she graduated in two years, and she was wondering what their master’s program had to offer.

Then Mrs. Etsitty asked, “Amy. What have your grades been like?”

“I’ve been on the Dean’s List every quarter.”, Amy replied. “And the President’s Honor List once.”

That got a raised eyebrow from Mrs. Etsitty. Then she said, “That explains why you’re wearing that Sigma Theta Tau pin.”

“Yes, ma’am.”, Amy replied.

“Not too many nursing students receive that until their Junior year, if then.”

“Yes, ma’am. I know. It surprised me when I received it.”

“You must have deserved it. And judging by what you told me about your grades, you did.”

Amy didn’t say anything.

Then Mrs. Etsitty asked, “Why would you want to come here for your masters?”

“I’ve been out here with my friend, Kai, twice this summer for a week each time. And I’ve come to love this part of the country. I’ve also met some of Kai’s relatives and others, and I love the people.”

“So you might want to live out here?”

“Yes, ma’am. I just might.”

“Judging by how you're dressed you’ve already accepted part of the culture.”

“Kai’s aunt and uncle wear the typical Navajo dress for work, and I just loved the look. So her grandmother and aunt took us shopping one day, and I bought a couple of skirts and blouses. And I find them to be comfortable.”

Then Mrs. Etsitty looked at me, and said, “And you must be Kai?”

“Yes, ma’am.”, I replied.

She looked at me for a few seconds, then said, “I’ve seen you somewhere before.”

“My grandmother was here in the hospital earlier this year, and I was here a lot.”

“No. Somewhere else. I never forget a face.”

I thought, ‘Oh no. Here we go again.’

“Newspaper!”, Mrs. Etsitty said. “That’s it. You were in the newspaper.”

I looked at Amy, and said, “Can’t I get away from this?”

“No.”, Amy replied. “I don’t think you can.”

“So it was the newspaper.”, Mrs. Etsitty said.

“Yes, ma’am.”, Amy replied. “Both of us were in the paper. We were both made members of one of the Navajo clans. And Kai was made a member of the Navajo Nation.”

“Yes! Of course. But there was something else?”

“Yes, ma’am.”, I said. “I’m a two spirit person.”

“That’s it! Now I remember. My husband is Navajo. So when we saw the article and your picture, he explained it to me, and we talked about it. Interesting. And you were with the chief of the Navajo Nation.”

“Yes. We were.”

“Now Amy. I have some information for you to take with you. Then during your Senior year, if you still want to come here for your masters, I’d apply as soon as possible. There are deadline dates, and you’ll find those in the catalog. And I’d include any letters of recommendation that you can.”

“That sounds good, Mrs. Etsitty.”, Amy replied. “How are the openings in the hospital for a nurse? I’d like to work full time while I’m working on my degree.”

“They’re always looking for good nurses. Is there any particular area that you’re interested in?”

“The emergency room.”

“Why the emergency room?”

“One of the departments that I did a weeks rotation in, during my clinicals, was the Emergency Room. For the final three weeks of my clinicals, I could choose any department, and I chose the Emergency Room. I felt that I could give my best there. And they did ask me to come back.”

“Was this at a teaching hospital?”

“Yes, it was at the university’s medical center.”

“Do you have any foreign language background?”

“I have four years of high school Spanish and two years in college so far.”

“That’s good. Try to become as fluent as you can in it. Many people out here have Spanish as their first language, and it’s sometimes better to speak with them in Spanish. Especially in a traumatic situation.

“Also we encourage our grad students to teach some classes. Would you have a problem with that?”

“No. Not at all.”

As we were leaving, Mrs. Etsitty handed Amy a college catalog and some paperwork. Then as she shook hands with Amy, she said, “I really hope you decide to join us.”

“I think that there’s an excellent possibility that I will.”, Amy replied.

As we were walking across campus, Amy asked, “Are you really serious about coming out here after we graduate?”

“Do you think I’d have wasted our time coming here if I wasn’t?”, I replied.

“I guess you wouldn’t.”

“You know I wouldn’t.”

In a whisper, Amy said, “I want to kiss you so bad right now.”

“Why?”, I asked.

“Because you’re so wonderful.”

“Can you wait until we get to the car?”

As we drove out of the visitor's lot, I said, “That was some kiss.”

“You just wait until tonight.”, Amy said with a sly smile. Then she said, “You know. If we are really coming out here, it would be nice to learn some Navajo.”

“I know they don’t offer that at the university.”

“What about your Mom?”

“That’s a thought. I have heard Mom talk to grandma and her sisters in Navajo.”

“We’ll ask her when we get home.”

“That may be a way to break the news that we’re thinking of moving out here.”

“Think we can come back out here next summer for a week or so?”

“I don’t see why not.”

We took a drive around the campus before heading back to the resort. It’s a nice campus, but smaller than what we’re used to. And you could see new buildings under construction, so they were growing.

We headed back to the resort and were there with plenty of time to spare before we were meeting my aunt and uncle at their house for dinner. So we started packing our clothes for the flight home. We also carefully wrapped and packed the framed certificates that Amy and I had been given. As well as the two pictures of Great-Great-Grandfather Nez that Aunt Ginny had given us. One for my mother, and one for Amy and me. I also packed the branches from the tree on the cliff and the piece of wood from the bonfire.

We didn’t pack our fancy clothes, as we were going to change before we went to the bonfire. I also unpacked Tom’s clothes for the flight home.

As we were packing, Amy asked, “Are we going to watch a sunset tonight?”

“I don’t know.”, I replied. “Do you want to?”

“I think I’d rather spent the time with your aunt and uncle, and hopefully grandma will be there too.”

“Good thought.”

As we’d said, we were going all out for tonight’s bonfire. Amy wore the black and red Biil dress and her moccasins. She put her hair into a ponytail and used the beaded butterfly barrette to hold it in place. Then she added her new Concho belt. I was wearing the white Biil dress and the wrap moccasins. I brushed my hair straight and used the braided leather headband with the feathers. And of course my Concho belt. We also decided to wear the matching feather earrings. The rest of the jewelry went into a case, and we’d put that on just before going to the bonfire.

We took two of our suitcases with us to my aunts and uncles, so we didn’t have to worry about them in the morning. And we cut through the hotel on the way to my aunt and uncle’s house, and as I’d hoped, Shilah, the room clerk that had helped me when I was attacked, was there.

We received the looks from the other resort guests that we’d gotten before when we were dressed this way. We always returned their smiles.

As we walked up to the desk, Shilah saw us, smiled, and said, “Yá’át’ééh alní'íní, Miss Kai, and Miss Ajie.”

“Yá’át’ééh alní'íní, Shilah.”, I replied. “I’m glad that you’re here.”

“I hear that you are leaving us tomorrow.”

“Yes, first thing in the morning. We have a nine o’clock flight.”

“Safe journey.”

“Thank you. And I want to say thank you again you for what you did.”

“Miss Kai. It was nothing. He was out of line and needed to be shown that he was.”

“Thank you anyway.”

“You have a good trip.”

“So long, Shilah.”

He smiled, and said, “Yes. We will see you again, Miss Kai and Miss Ajie.”

“Hopefully next summer.”

We finished walking to my aunt and uncle’s house and spent time talking with them and grandma. And helping my aunt and grandma prepare a nice trout dinner. My uncle’s fishing trip had been successful. And the fish was delicious.

As we were eating, my aunt asked, “So. Are you two thinking of coming back to visit with us?”

“Yes.”, I said. “We’re talking about next summer.” I thought about mentioning that we were thinking about coming out here for Amy’s master’s degree. But I decided that we needed to talk with our parents first. So nothing was mentioned.

It had started to get dark, and I wanted to go to the bonfire. Amy and I removed the jewelry from the case and put it on. The squash blossom necklaces, the bracelet, the rings, and the beaded chokers that we’d been given.

My aunt and grandmother looked at us. Both of them smiled and gave us their approval. Then my grandmother said something to my aunt in Navajo. My aunt replied and walked out of the room. My aunt was back in a minute with a pair of wrap moccasins, and as she handed them to Amy, she said, “Amy, grandma and I decided that you needed a pair of wrap moccasins to finish off your outfit. You can return them in the morning.”

As Amy took them, she said, “Thank you, Aunt Ruth.”

With a sly smile, I said, “We should have dyed your hair black.”

Amy didn’t say anything but just glared at me. Then she replaced her moccasins with the wrap moccasins. And the five of us headed towards the bonfire. As we walked my uncle said, “We thought of moving the bonfire to where we hold the barbecue for more room. But decided that it just wouldn’t be the same.”

“Why would you move it?”, I asked.

“We wanted to include some dancers tonight. And we have, but only a few.”

“Why the dancers?”

“Just to do something different.”

As we walked up the bonfire, we saw that along with the singers and drummer, as Uncle Paul had said, there were a few dancers, who were already dancing in the area of the fire.

As we got closer, we started seeing familiar faces mixed in with the guests. There was Naainish, both Chiefs, and Dee was one of the dancers. We greeted everyone but Dee, who along with three of her friends were dancing.

Dee finished a dance and with one of her friends ran over to us. We greeted each other with a hug. And Dee said, “Kai. I’m so glad that you’re here.”

“Dee. It’s good to see you again.”, I replied.

I saw Dee’s friend take Amy’s hand and pull her towards where they’d been dancing. Then Dee grabbed my hand and pulled me in the same direction, and said, “Come dance with us.”

“I don’t know how.”

“I’ll teach you. It’s easy.”

I let her pull me to where the other dancers were standing. One with Amy and the other two with guests that they pulled out of the crowd of guests. The singers started with a slow song. Dee showed me a couple of steps. I tried them. Then she showed me again, and I think I got them this time. She showed me a couple more steps. I did those. Then she took my hand, and we started dancing side by side. I tried to copy her steps. I got some of them and some I didn’t.

I saw Amy and two guests with the other girls trying to lean the steps too. Amy wasn’t doing too bad, probably better than I was. The two guests weren’t doing too bad either.

Dee said, “You’re starting to get it. See it’s not hard.”

“It’s hard when you’ve never danced like this before.”, I replied.

“Just listen to the music and feel it.”

I started to feel the music, and I began to move with it. Dee said, “See you can do it.”

We finished the dance with a nice round of applause from everyone watching us. Amy and her partner were walking over to where my aunt and uncle were with us, and Amy said, “Kai, I didn’t know that you could dance.”

“Only slow stuff.”, I replied. “And then not very good. And it helps to have a good teacher.”

As we walked up to where my family was standing, grandma said, “You two picked up that dance really well.”

“Dee’s a good teacher.”, I said.

“You were a good student.”, Dee said.

“My teacher was good too.”, Amy added.

We had a great time at this bonfire. We watched the dancers, listened to the music, and talked to some of the guests. We were standing with my grandmother, aunt, and uncle, and it was late evening, and Amy said, “Honey. We have an early up tomorrow. We should get to bed.”

My aunt overheard that and said, “Is five too early for breakfast?”

“I guess not.”, I replied. “I just wish we didn’t have to leave.”

“I know, honey. We’re going to miss you too.”

“Thanks for everything Aunt Ruth. You, grandma, and Uncle Paul have been wonderful.”

“We’ll see you at five then.”

Amy and I then spent longer than we’d should have wandering around and saying so long to everyone. Everyone wanted to talk, but we excused ourselves saying that we needed to get to bed. The Chiefs and Naainish were the last ones that we said so long too.

Chief Kinlicheeny, then said, "I believe that we will see you, both of you, again."

I grinned, as I said, “You just might.”

Amy and I made it to our room, undressed, and packed our fancy clothes. Then we took showers, but not together. Amy took her shower first, and when I came out of the shower, she was already sound asleep. I gave her a little kiss on the cheek, and she smiled, then I crawled into bed, and was quickly asleep.

* * * * * *

When we got up Wednesday morning, it was early, and I was thinking of dressing as Kai, but then I remembered that we were going home. So I reluctantly became Tom. Amy picked up on my feelings, and asked, “Honey, are you all right?”

“I guess.”, I replied.

“Missing Kai. Aren’t you?”

“Yeah. I’ve been her for over a week, and it’s hard putting Kai away.”

“I know. I’ll miss her too.” Then Amy walked up to me and touched my chest, she added, “But sweetheart, just remember she will always be in your heart. And in mine too.”

I took her in my arms, looked into her eyes, and said, “Baby, I love you so much.”

We shared a deep kiss.

We walked into my aunt and uncle’s house right at five. My aunt was just placing what she called Enchiladas Montadas on the table. These are stacked enchiladas with an over easy egg on top. She also had orange juice for everyone. A tall glass of milk for Amy and me. And coffee for my uncle, grandmother, and herself.

We ate well and talked. Then Amy gave Aunt Ruth her moccasins and thanked her. And at six o’clock the five of us and our four suitcases and one carry on were in the resorts van and on the way to the airport in Albuquerque.

As we drove, we talked, and I let it slip that we were thinking of coming out here after we graduated. My grandmother looked at me, and asked, “What did you just say?”

Amy looked at me, and said, “I didn’t think we were going to say anything until we talked to our parents.”

Feeling a little sheepish, said, “Sorry. It slipped out.”

“So your thinking of coming out here after you graduate?”, my aunt asked.

“Yes, Aunt Ruth.”, Amy said. “We’ve talked about it and even stopped at the university to find out about their master’s degree program.”

“But please.”, I added. “Don’t say anything to my mother until we can talk to them about what we’re thinking?”

“We won’t.”, my aunt said.

I looked at my grandmother, and she said, “I’ll try not to.”

“Please?”

“Okay. We’ll make it our secret. But why out here?”

We explained how we felt about being out here and the people. And the three of them promised to keep our secret.

We arrived at the airport and checked in at the airline’s desk, gave them our suitcases and then the five of us went to the gate to wait for boarding. We were early, so we found some seats to sit and talk.

After we’d been sitting there for a few minutes, I looked over at the gate and saw something. I asked my uncle, “Uncle Paul. Am I a little paranoid or ...