finally have a new story up:

https://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/fiction/95250/when-paths-cross

so, just in case I didn't have enough going on right now, someone broke the driver's side window of my car again.

I am just shaking.

Writing prompt: A small child somehow ends up in the Greek Underworld, sees Cerberus, cries, "Puppy!" and cuddles the creature.

What does Hades do when he sees this?

Something strange happened last night.

just as Mom and I were headed for bed, we got a call from Sharon. When Sharon is angry, her accent and speed of speech make her hard to understand, but from what I could gather, she had a "feeling from God" about some kind of evil coming into the house, and went to check on Sam, who was playing with her cell phone

Sharon asked to see what she was doing, and Sam refused, and Sharon lost it, and she had called us to take Sam for the night because Sharon couldn't have "a dark spirit" around.

My sister-in-law Carol was taken to the hospital due to her back issues.

hugs and prayers appreciated.

I have had a really tough day.

It started with mom blowing a fuse making breakfast, and it took about 10 hours to get power back.

Then when we went to our car, we found that someone had smashed in my driver's side window looking for valuables
.
Mom is convinced they wanted our parking pass, as that is the only thing missing, and therefore its my fault for leaving it visible to people outside the car.

sighs . . .

I surrendered to Jaci's girl germs, and put on a skirt for my birthday yesterday.

Despite the fact I look like a dude in a dress, nobody said anything negative.

in fact, I got complimented on my outfit while in Walmart

I was getting a few things, and this lady had a little one in her shopping cart, who couldn't keep her eyes off me. I waved at the little one, and that's when the mom complimented me on my outfit

I think I blushed hard enough to drown out the lights.

well, I learned something about my manic phase today.

I never realized there is a path from my manic phase to Mr. Nasty, my negative self-talk.

But, there is.

Its because if I get angry while manic, that anger has more energy than when I'm depressed, and if the anger is caused by a sense of helplessness, and almost all my anger is, its really easy for that anger to shift focus to the helplessness itself, and then Mr. Nasty can start beating me up for being helpless.

Good to know, not fun to experience.

Here is a little writing prompt for anybody who wants it:

I walked up to the door, and knocked. A young man answered, and he asked, "Can I help you."

I replied "I'm here to kill you."

There was a pause, and then the young man opened the door, saying "Well, you better come in, then."

There you go, folks, have fun!

latest chapter of TTSD is up:

https://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/fiction/94317/ttsd-5-dot-hunting

Well, I am in the home stretch in terms of the move.

We get the keys today, and pay our rent, and then we'll have a week to move whatever Mom and I can carry before the movers come for the furniture.

I am not sure how often I'll be able to check in, but when I can, I will.

Wish me luck, folks.

Okay for some reason, this morning I was thinking about how when I was a kid I had a very specific routine when it came to being dressed.
It occurred to me the routine was what would be approprate for wearing some more feminine clothing - underwear, socks, then bottoms and then top being reasonable if you replace the socks with pantyhose.

It seems that I was pretending to dress more feminine as a way to cope with my dysphoria, which would make sense.

not sure what figuring that out now gets me, but knowledge is power, I guess.

okay so today I got a bottle run done, and then took a load to Goodwill and a load to the Eco Station (the dump).

I am totes burned out now.

so according to my account, I've been a member here for 13 years and 1 day.

I wish I could feel like celebrating, because I'm super grateful for this place, but I'm struggling with depression.

new chapter of Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Dot is up!

https://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/fiction/94023/tinker-tailor-s...