The Weekly Dormouse. (aka Bike, est. 2007) Part 3453 by Angharad Copyright© 2024 Angharad

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This is a work of fiction any mention of real people, places or institutions is purely coincidental and does not imply that they are as suggested in the story.
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By the time I had returned to the hotel, James collected me in his Porsche. I was quite anxious as I didn't know how much the Chief Inspector was going to put in his report. I mean I hit him off his chair with a ball of light twice, and saved his son's life. I was sad the other lad didn't make it, I don't know what happened to the lorry driver. How do I get into these situations? Trish had emerged from the bath and was sitting with Danni and they were talking and eating crisps.

Trish immediately rose and gave me a monster hug, "I knew you would come so I tried to remain upbeat, but I was beginning to wonder," she said tears running down her face. "I kept sending the light and thinking of you, I even asked the goddess for help but she as good as told me I was doing all right."

"We asked her too," I replied, "and she pretty well told us the same. So I just sat quietly and your whereabouts, well roughly came into my consciousness. James did some more traditional research and found something that backed us up, and Michelle told us of the splinter lesbian group which she suspected may have TERF sympathies. She showed us where to go, I stated my case, threatened to call the police and all hell broke loose. They surrendered and produced you when I offered some more violence. So now you know."

We hugged again and then Trish told me she was starving, so we went down to the dining room and ordered a meal. "How come the copper left before you did?" James asked as we were waiting for our meal to be brought.

"I saw his son in a crash and pleaded with him to call his son and tell him to get out of the car. He waited until it was nearly too late, I hit him with ball of light twice to make him realise I wasn't messing. He rang his son and told him to leave the car, I saw the accident in my mind's eye, the car was hit by an articulated lorry, I don't think the driver made it, I don't know about the lorry driver. He rang his son back and the boy was hysterical, he'd witnessed the collision."

"Would it have happened if he hadn't stopped to let the boy out?"

"I don't know but I suspect it would. The blue light doesn't mess about."

"No it doesn't, but did someone have to die?" James asked me the question with which I had been wrestling.

"I don't know, and have been thinking about it. Usually, it does things to save or prolong life, so I suspect the collision was always going to happen. I'm sorry I couldn't save both of them, but I hoped it made my case more strongly."

"More strongly!" James looked at me, "The copper's gone off on sick leave, he was so shaken by all of it."

"So have we to start all over again with someone different?"

"Dunno, but it's likely."

"I have a job from which I'm currently absent, I have to go home and run my department again, I can't spend days up here." I complained that while my girls were so important to me, so was my job and it so happened to be at the beginning of a new term, or nearly.

"I'm sure Diane will be okay," Danni smirked.

"You know something I don't, don't you?" I challenged her.

"She spoke to her earlier and said you'd found me; she said things were hectic but that she was coping, so not to worry." Trish added to the conversation.

"I'll just have to sort out the mess when I get back," I shrugged having full confidence in my PA. But give her an inch and she'll take a few hectares.

"What happens if they don't believe you and go for you knowing something about it?" James asked another difficult question.

"I think I would be able to argue a strong case for it not being a publicity stunt and Trish will verify that." She was nodding vehemently. The meal came and the conversation lapsed as we ate.

"I think I frightened some of them, they thought I was a witch or something," Trish bragged, "It was pitch dark in the room where I was being held and I asked the blue light to keep me company and make things bearable. It illuminated the room for me until I fell asleep, they accused me of having a torch or another mobile phone. That reminds me, they still owe me an iPhone as they said they lost mine."

"You lot get more like the Addams Family every time I meet you," James chuckled.

"Thank you Lurch, that'll be all," I responded and Trish and Danni looked confused.

"A previous manifestation on the telly when we were kids. Lurch was the butler and he was about seven foot tall, the same actor appeared in a Bond film with Roger Moore, when they were less serious for a while.

"Why did they think you were a witch?" asked Danni.

"Well they did a search of the room and demanded where the light had come from, I went all Quantum on them and said, that all light comes from the sun. They demanded to know where it was and I told them that if I wanted light, I could make it shine, so they got all empirical on me and switched off the light and asked me to demonstrate. I just said, 'let there be light' and they all seemed to be on fire. No one was hurt but that freaked them out."

"Not surprised," said Danni, "It would freak me out too an' I know you're a right poseur."

"Glad you're so pleased to see me," was the retort.

"I'm here in I?" How much did we pay at that school? I'm beginning to think we may be due a refund.

"Girls, please," I said firmly and they both shut up.

"So how are you going to handle the police?" James wasn't going to give up.

"I don't know, I suppose I'll respond to what they ask me." It was the best I could think of for the moment, "Besides, your evidence will back me up, won't it and then there's Michelle as well."

"Well, it's like your blue light thing, it's not conclusive and has a few holes. Why not just get Trish to set fire to a few coppers and take it from there, they can't charge you with witchcraft anyway, it was taken off the statute book."

"They'd just call it assault likely to lead to serious injury or something."

"They can't use with a deadly weapon at any rate." He was such a comfort but the witchcraft and fraudulent mediums act was only abolished in the 1950s, it's not a hundred years yet and it was before the decriminalisation of homosexuality which speaks reams about how this country thinks, but then hasn't Trump accused Harris of witchcraft, which shows how disturbed he is and how bizarre America is. At the same time I read something about a film of a road trip with Will Ferrell and Harper Steele where the latter comes out as trans. Ferrell comes out of it as being caring and understanding of his friend after getting over the initial shock, showing that these people still exist in an increasingly polarised post Trump country. How many will still wish to reside there if Trump wins again. Talking of the Orange one, I read he is suing Google because he claims they are unfairly treating his campaign compared to Harris. They say not but it demonstrates that he is well into his dementia, which is rather scary as millions of his followers don't seem to have noticed and do they really want to be stuck with Vance as a president if it worsens? The world grows scarier with Israel out of control and talk of invading Lebanon again which might set Iran off and then wholesale war would result. Mind you as a born-again shithead, the Donald would be a supporter of Israel in such a conflict. Scary doesn't really describe it, it's a brown trousers situation.

The evening went on with all sorts of conversation and the girls noticed I was distracted, when I was contemplating the end of civilisation or possibly the world and nukes flying around the place would do nothing for biodiversity which is suffering all over the world, especially in the UK. We're already coping with wet springs and summers but nuclear winter would be something else. Better start stocking up on tins of tuna. I smiled to myself and Danni noticed. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing, I just ran with a thought and came to a silly conclusion." I then tried to distract her but she wasn't having it and I had to share my thoughts with them.

"How is all this gonna help us with the cops?"

"Well, I reckon if we can obfuscate for a week or so, it won't matter because the end of the world will have happened and the police will all be busy rushing about killing cockroaches and flies."

"Should the emphasis be on killing the enemy first?" asked Trish, which showed a little of her naïvete and why I was concerned about her being on her own and attending Cambridge. She may be megabright but she is still an ingénue and extremely gullible at times, but I know she won't reconsider, which is okay if they keep her locked up in a lab all the time but I worry about when she isn't and associating with people older and more streetwise that she.

By the time my head had returned to the present, the conversation had moved on to something else and I excused myself and went to bed while Danni and Trish were still talking. I think James was still there too but he might have gone to bed.

Had I made up my mind about what I would tell the police? I decided I would try to stay as close to the truth as I could but would take my lead from them. I knew it was going to be difficult but I could do nothing about it until they showed how they were dealing with it and that looked as though they may accuse me of setting up a hoax for publicity purposes. How wrong they could be doesn't bear thinking about. I don't know what time I fell asleep but it wasn't very early and I knew morning would be here before I was ready for it and so would the police. Oh poo.

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