The Weekly Dormouse. (aka Bike, est. 2007) Part 3472 by Angharad Copyright© 2024/2025 Angharad

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This is a work of fiction any mention of real people, places or institutions is purely coincidental and does not imply that they are as suggested in the story.
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I was actually back at home when Henry rang. He immediately asked after Meems and I told him she was conscious and on the mend and as soon as she could leave hospital, I'd have her home. Emily and her mum plus David would help to watch over her if I couldn't be there myself and Danni, Sarah and the younger girls would help. As a family, we stick together, except possibly Trish who although Meems and she decided they were sisters at a very young age, she couldn't be bothered to come to visit her sister. I mentioned to Henry who said he would have a word with her, he also said very clever people are often selfish, focusing on their own future and just forgetting everyone else. It wasn't usually spiteful more just lack of awareness as they often thought in very confined areas.

"Now, why did you really call?"

"I wanted to update you but also to ask for some advice. Meems seems to have been attacked by a county-lines gang because she spotted a staff member possibly supplying cocaine to a student, she had previously noticed his distraction and absence from some of his classes. She had reported all this to their line-manager. It was this colleague who ran her down, nearly killing her. Tonight Danni and I were chased by a thug who we managed to disable and the police found he was carrying a gun and a flick-knife. They arrested him but were considering charging me with GBH just because I slammed a door on his head."

Henry chuckled on the other end of the phone, "Obviously one of those who hasn't heard of your reputation for all-in dormouse wrestling." I laughed at this as well.

"So you're up against organised crime. Oh dear, they tend to have long memories and few scruples, the only way to beat them is to eradicate them completely. You need MI5 lass, get on to Sam and ask her."

"I already have, when Meems was first hurt."

"She tends to have more contacts these days than I do, most of those I knew have either retired or died. Have you spoken to James?"

"James is supervising her protection while she is in hospital with his ex SBS friends. The hospital have been quite helpful and this recent attack on Danni and I tonight, has freshened the memory that we are under threat and Meems who can't weight-bear, is especially vulnerable."

"Well, see what Sam can do and continue the guard around her, I'll pay something towards it, no one runs over my grandchildren without consequences, severe ones. I'll speak to anyone I can remember who can help, but it's a tough one, but at the end of the day, my money's on you girl. 'I'm a dormouse, hear me roar.'" He laughed again and rang off promising to do what he could, he would call me as soon as he could.

James turned up as we were heating up David's homemade pasties. I only ate one, James and Danni finished them off. Danni then went off to bed, sending off the younger girls in front of her. When I described the moment of realisation that we were being stalked and telling Danni to run for it, I became all trembly. Danni seemed unaffected by it, James was very interested and had heard via his plod contacts who the assailant was and with the evidence found in his possession, looked to be in prison for a long time.

I told him I spoken to Henry and disappointedly told him that Henry thought he was too out of it to be much help. I decided to speak with Sam. If you remember she is my daughter with another enormous brain, who manages the security for the bank and also does some occasional work for GCHQ, this is the security services listening HQ, where they monitor all sorts of communications around the world. They work with other interested parties like the US, Australia and New Zealand and the EU. They often tip off these other countries because they have fresh news through intercepted signals. Sadly, lone wolf attacks will always happen because they sometimes slip below the radar, but organised ones often are neutralised before we ever hear of it.

Sammi told me that MI5 were aware of all that was happening and were interested in acting with the plod to neutralise the particular gang who were threatening us, but they were slow, trying to cover every hitch as they went. I discussed this with James asking if we were able to mount a much speedier attack and take these guys out?

"You mean kill them?" he asked in a funny voice.

"If necessary, yes."

"I dunno, you don't pay me as an assassin."

" I pay you as a fixer. So fix it."

"I dunno Cathy, this is usually outside my usual contract. I'm happy to put as many of them away as we can, for as long as we can. These are not nice people."

"They are pests, an infestation, they need eradication."

"What does Henry say?"

"He's leaving this to us to solve."

"I still don't know, Cathy. Once you start killing people the law takes a very dim view of you."

"Don't these people have a central control?"

"No, they tend to run cells with minimal contact between the different ones. There is obviously a central controller but he's often unknown to the lower echelons."

"That could work in our favour."

"How?"

"If we take out the odd cell, there will be a time lapse before they realise it, so we may be able to strike two or three times before they realise we're after them. If my plan works it will cause the big boss to break cover and I want his head, metaphorically of course, but I want to feel he'll never cause anyone else such a nuisance and heartbreak. Meems could have died."

"Shiner did. They got him and dead men tell no tales."

"Did you get that from, 'Treasure Island?'"

"Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum."

"At least you knew what I was talking about. Today's kids don't. They can do amazing things on their smart phones but don't know who Mozart was. We are raising a generation of techi morons. No wonder they claim mental health issues as soon as they meet the real world. They are singularly ill equipped to deal with it, and they have all been told how precious and special they are but never educated in real life. The term snowflake comes to mind."

"Remember you're one of those in charge of their education."

"My courses expect them to deal with real life as well as small furry things. They have to show they can do it before they meet any small furries. Dormice and harvest mice are the icing on the cake, as are smooth snakes and sand lizards, we need to know that these animals are safe before our students see them, and I try to teach them that seeing these creatures is a privilege not an entitlement."

"Brava," he said, "you should be secretary of state for education."

"Not me, too much politics and politicians are all liars and crooks. Me I am Nemesis, for this gang. Help me to plan how we take them out so they can never practice their perfidy again."

We were drinking tea and snacking on biscuits when my phone rang. It was Sammi and she told me that someone would contact me tomorrow. She rang off before I could ask how or where. It was real James Bond stuff, a bit like how James and I first met.

I expressed my frustration and James told me that it sounded like a spook would be in touch, that probably meant MI5 or MI6 and they did take people out, in fact they could be more pragmatic than the villains and therefore more dangerous.

"Aren't these guys on our side?" I implored James.

"Nominally, but remember they work for government. They are called secret service because they operate in secret. Once they are after you, there is no escape."

"Tell that to Philby, he escaped."

"That was a long time ago, I doubt he would nowadays, and remember that scientist who was found having committed suicide in a way that a doctor said was impossible. He was on our side but was about to blow the whistle on the weapons of mass destruction that Iraq didn't have. It went against US and UK intention so he had to go. Probably MI6, they tend to do the eradication."

"Oh, will we have James Bond fighting for us then?"

"Bond is an assassin, you don't him anywhere near you."

"The franchise has been bought by Amazon, they're bigger bullies and brown-nosers than Bond, far more frightening."

"Sadly, I think that might be true, especially in a Trumpian America, which is reminiscent of Saturnalia, you know where everything was turned upside down."

"The only good thing there is that the Roman empire became extinct as all empires do, the British one did and that was the biggest ever seen, America is on the way out as China overtakes it, probably more quickly with Trump and Musk in charge. The line from Siegfried Sassoon's poem of the, 'Lions led by donkeys', seems rather apt of the American war machine and especially that of Russia, the latter seems to need help from China and Iran to keep up the war in Ukraine, but let's see what that genius of a deal maker, Trump does to end it."

"You're fired," he yelled at me, "Couldn't deal a pack of cards."

I agreed and we went to bed knowing that Chas and Dave were watching over Meems at Southampton and that we would hear from a spook tomorrow who may have ideas we hadn't thought of and information we didn't possess.

I went up to bed and found Danni asleep in my bed. I was getting into it when she woke and told me she was guarding me, then she turned over and zonked. Some bodyguard, but it was a nice thought and I slept much better that night.