The Daily Dormouse. (aka Bike) Part 1583 by Angharad Copyright © 2011 Angharad All Rights Reserved.

At breakfast the next day Simon said, “I can’t believe that they let you turn up in school wearing the girl’s uniform–didn’t anyone say anything to the press?”

“If they had, I’d have been expelled for being weird, or they’d have made up some story about a girl coming for specific tuition, or lessons unavailable in the girl’s school. Anyway, I have a few more things to worry about than that today.”

“Like what?”

“Like Julie going for her op.”

“Oh yes, that’s tomorrow isn’t it?”

“She has to go in tonight for tomorrow. I have a list here–she’s not to eat anything much after lunch.”

“I’d have thought she’d be too scared to eat very much anyway,” he replied.

“Scared? Why would she be scared?”

“Well, I mean it’s...” he looked down at his groin, “It’s a very sensitive place.”

“It’s certainly a place about which she’s sensitive–but no longer after tomorrow.”

I’d allowed her to have Tash here overnight, so she didn’t show at breakfast, and by mid morning I was becoming worried that she wouldn’t be ready in time. I knocked on her bedroom door. Inside I could hear what sounded like cries of passion. Fearing what might be happening, I knocked again and entered. Tash was waxing Julie’s groin. So it wasn’t cries of passion but pain. I blushed and apologised and beat a hasty retreat. I hoped that she wouldn’t come out in too much of a rash and prevent the surgery being feasible–it wasn’t the cleverest of ideas.

They eventually came down for lunch, which, although it was a Sunday, I made a thin soup–it was on Julie’s list of permitted foods. I felt sorry for her watching everyone else eat loads while she had to keep to the strict diet. However, this was something she had wanted for a long time. I was loading the dishwasher when she came over with their dirty plates. “We’ll need to do a checklist to make sure you haven’t forgotten anything.”

“I’ve done it all already, Mummy.”

“Did you check the list they gave you?”

“Yes, and Tash did too.”

“Oh well, you’re technically an adult now, so I suppose I need to treat you like one occasionally.”

“Are you taking me into the hospital?”

“Yes–what time do they want you there?”

“After tea–six o’clock, I think.”

“Okay, I’ll run you in, but check the time just in case.”

“Okay, okay–um–Mummy, can Tash come with me?”

“As long as she appreciates they’ll have things to do–did you take the laxative they gave you?”

“Yes, I think it flushed out my Christmas dinner.” She smirked at me, unaware of what lay in-store for her when she got there–bowel washes and enemas–all good stuff.

“Can you take her home afterward?”

“If she’s ready to go when I leave you, yes.”

“I’ll tell her.” She suddenly stood up and hugged and kissed me. “I love you, Mummy, and tomorrow is so important–and it’s all down to you.”

“I love you too, sweetheart, and I think your father’s chequebook might have had some small part in it too.”

“I know, but I can’t face him at the moment–I’m sure he thinks I’m making a huge mistake.”

“He’s a man, so he’d fight to the death to keep his meat and two veg, but he knows you’re not, and d’you honestly think he’d pay out thousands for something if he wasn’t sure it was the right thing to do?”

“If you told him to he would.”

“I think you credit me with more influence than I have.”

“Go on, Mummy, you’re the boss round here, even Kiki does what you tell her.”

“If that was the case she’d stop crapping in my snowdrops.”

Julie giggled nervously.

“Everything is alright, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, course it is; and I’m scared to death.”

“Scared? Scared of what?”

“Scared I could die, Mummy–scared that the surgery might not work.”

“But O’Rourke has a wonderful reputation, he’s worked on me and your sister, and we’re both fine.”

“But what if it doesn’t work?”

“I’m not sure I understand what you mean.”

“I saw some things on the internet about failed vaginoplasties and they were truly horrific. It scared me–until I saw them I’d never have believed such a mess was possible.”

“Well, anything could happen, but it won’t–I expect the pictures you saw were of surgery done by unqualified surgeons.”

“Some of them died.”

“I’m afraid surgery always carries a risk, darling, but I survived and so did Trish. I have total conviction in Mr O’Rourke, so I expect you to be fine. I’ll come and see you as soon as you’re back from surgery.”

“Will you bring Tash?”

“I don’t know, sweetheart, they won’t always let boy or girlfriends in until you feel a bit stronger.”

“Will you try?”

“I’ll follow the advice of the hospital, if they say okay, then I will, if not I’ll let her know you’re okay.”

“I’m still scared shitless, Mummy.”

“That might mean an enema isn’t necessary.”

“Enema–they don’t do an enema, do they?”

“They have to check your bowel is empty to reduce the risk of infection.”

“Oh dear god, they don’t, do they?”

“I’ve had one, it’s nothing, really.”

“They always do them in porn stories.”

“Why are you reading porn stories?”

“I just did–for a year or two before I came here.”

“I can only guess why they do them in porn stories, but in a medical sense it’s to reduce the risk of coliforms getting into the wound.”

“Cauliflowers?” she looked aghast at me.

I couldn’t help laughing, and shook my head, “No, dear, coliforms–bugs from the gut, you know the colon.”

“Phew, I thought you said cauliflowers–I wondered what they did with cauliflowers.”

“Not a lot, I should think.”

We hugged and she told me she’d like me to check all her stuff. I removed the ipad from her bag and she grumbled. “I’ll bring it in with me when you’re capable of using it, which won’t be for a couple of days–it cost a lot of money, and I don’t want it stolen. Take your MP3 player in with you for now. I’ve got a small lockable metal box you can borrow with a chain, so you can keep your ipad and things in there and lock it round the leg of the bed, should be safe enough then. Right, I have to organise a meal for the rest of them, I suggest you take Tash and go out for a walk or upstairs out of the way.”

She kissed me, called Tash and they went upstairs again. I did my usual chore of making yet another meal and serving it, although I didn’t feel much like eating any, I was anxious for her as well. Finally, it moved towards six and she gave everyone a hug and a kiss and I took a tearful Julie and Tash in my car to the hospital.

The nurse told me they’d be busy with her for the next hour, so I excused myself–Tash went off to the restaurant to wait, she was going back to the ward. I felt guilty, but I was teaching tomorrow morning, and had some other things on my mind–like where I’d filed my lecture notes for the first series I was doing. Why is my life so complicated, I only want to do everything and be everything to everyone–not much to ask for is it?